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About VinoVeritas : Single Dad, FML sometimes, but for the most part it's great.
YDI master
That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
50 favourites
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
Today, for the first time, I beat my brother in a game of CoD. Not being a gamer, I was ecstatic. Later, when I was in the shower, my brother snuck in the bathroom, yelled "Napalm strike!" and threw our cat over the shower curtain like a furry grenade from hell. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35449) - you deserved it (3521)
On 10/14/2011 at 12:11pm - kids - by MLGreco - United States
Today, I'd just finished feeding my parrot and sweeping all the seeds under the cage. As I was walking away, my parrot whistled. I turned around to see him get up onto the food dish, pick up a clawful of food and toss it on the floor. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18081) - you deserved it (2856)
On 10/06/2011 at 6:20am - misc - by kemando - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I was in class and really needed to pee. My teacher has chosen to replace our hall pass with a copy of War and Peace. She picks out a page for us to memorise on the shitter, and repeat by heart later. If we can't remember, we get locked out of class, and then get detention for being absent. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24674) - you deserved it (1978)
On 09/20/2011 at 5:25pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my five year old ran down the street wearing nothing but flip flops, Star Wars underwear, and a baseball helmet. He was swinging a badminton racket while screaming "THIS IS SPARTA!" My neighbors watched laughing as I had to run after him down the street in my pajamas. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21875) - you deserved it (6138)
On 09/17/2011 at 9:20pm - kids - by awesomekidsmum - Canada (Ontario)
Today, after falling on my way out the door, hitting a bird with my car, and sitting in an hour and a half of traffic, I remembered I had the day off work. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9021) - you deserved it (3580)
On 09/07/2011 at 1:37pm - work - by seriously? - United States
Today, I gave my boyfriend a blowjob. It gave him a panic attack. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22772) - you deserved it (3279)
On 09/07/2011 at 12:10am - intimacy - by Nublet (woman) - United States
Today, I awoke to my cat with micro pellets all over him. He'd destroyed a pillow containing them, and now there are thousands of these pellets throughout the entire house. My vacuum is broken. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16524) - you deserved it (2713)
On 09/02/2011 at 10:56am - animals - by PghSportsNation - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, at work, my boss stared at me from behind while I was making hand gestures and noises at a toaster. I was pretending to be Magneto. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6487) - you deserved it (18683)
On 09/02/2011 at 3:48am - work - by dragos_dgt (man) - Romania (Bucuresti)
Today, I asked my Dad if it was true that my mother had a C-section at my birth. He replied "Yeah, so technically you weren't even born, you were surgically removed, like a tumor." FML
I agree, your life sucks (26678) - you deserved it (3158)
On 09/01/2011 at 7:40pm - misc - by mannydanny (woman) - United Kingdom (Coventry)
Today, I walked into my shed to find my daughter's boyfriend asleep. He was also completely duct-taped to the ceiling, with his face painted like a clown. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23031) - you deserved it (2046)
On 08/31/2011 at 10:00am - kids - by piece of shed - United States (New York)
Today, I visited my son at work. He's an interpreter for the government. As I watched him converse with a group of men, I was overcome with pride. Then the woman next to me said "I can't believe they're talking about that in public." They were discussing masturbation techniques. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22962) - you deserved it (2232)
On 08/30/2011 at 11:30pm - intimacy - by mystupidson (woman) - United States (Colorado)
Today, I tried to impress the guy I like. He breeds reptiles, and I happen to have a snake and a lizard. I went over to his house to show them off. He opened the door just as my lizard fell between my boobs. He had to help me get it out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15021) - you deserved it (8026)
On 08/30/2011 at 1:35pm - animals - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I learned that I have the balls to base jump and skydive, but I still can't ask out the hot girl working at the pub. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15738) - you deserved it (5446)
On 08/30/2011 at 10:12am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, while at my boyfriend's cousin's birthday party, I was hanging around with his sister as I didn't know anyone. She was talking to some friends when one of them asked her, "So, is your brother still going out with that crazy chick?" Her answer was to introduce me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19399) - you deserved it (2690)
On 08/29/2011 at 1:15am - love - by Anonymous - United States
Today, after a long discussion, my dad still doesn't understand how evolution works, and thinks it's a myth that was debunked a long time ago. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13656) - you deserved it (5006)
On 08/28/2011 at 4:10pm - misc - by Ryan (man) - United States (Georgia)
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