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Vegetarian27's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 04/18/2014 at 6:35pm / Canada (Ontario) / Kids
by Ow / 04/18/2014 at 7:09am / United States (Arizona) / Health
by pablito / 04/17/2014 at 6:37am / France (Rhone-Alpes) / Animals
by stupiddog / 04/15/2014 at 8:08am / United States (California) / Animals
by Motha / 04/09/2014 at 1:17am / United States (Utah) / Miscellaneous
Today, for our 25th anniversary, my husband and I had dinner on a cruise ship, a dinner we had been planning for months. Upon boarding, I realized the expensive dress that I had bought just for the occasion had exactly the same print as the chair covers and the carpet. The cruise lasted 8 hours. FML
by Why / 04/02/2014 at 4:13am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous
Today, I went on a trip to Cleveland. After getting lunch, my brother and I started walking back to my car. Halfway there, we were jumped, threatened with a knife, and yelled at to hand over our money. The only thing my brother could do was ask our mugger, "Uh, what gender are you?" FML
by Anonymous / 03/28/2014 at 10:00pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous
Today, a would-be customer practically kicked my store door in, then got pissed and started throwing around insults after I told him that we were still closed, hence the closed sign. He claimed the sign was "confusing". FML
by IDIOT / 03/28/2014 at 4:11pm / United States / Work
Today, I wanted to try seducing my boyfriend by having nothing but a t-shirt on for when he'd get back from work. He came home, saw me, apologized bashfully for failing to knock first, and went back outside. FML
by oops / 03/27/2014 at 7:10pm / United States (California) / Love
by athletiks / 03/26/2014 at 6:39pm / United States (Washington) / Health
Today, no matter how many toys and teddies she has, and no matter how much I punish her, I am most likely never going to be able to break my 10-week-old puppy's habit of stealing my underwear. She doesn't eat them or even chew on them. She steals them to sleep with. FML
by Punphmelch / 03/26/2014 at 4:45am / Australia (South Australia) / Animals
by Anonymous / 03/24/2014 at 4:28pm / United States (Illinois) / Love
by chocochoco / 03/23/2014 at 11:40pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
Today, a tiny worm was wriggling across the screen of my Mac laptop. I tried to wipe it away with my thumb, but it just kept crawling. Turns out the worm lives *inside* my screen, beneath the glass. FML
by Anonymous / 03/21/2014 at 1:14am / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous
by no / 03/20/2014 at 6:18pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Miscellaneous
- 1Today, my neighbor's 4-year-old daughter came up to me and asked if she could have my dog. When I… 2Today, after working for Uber for a few weeks I realized that my driver rating was dropping. After… 3Today, I received a phone call, angry at me for not calling my dad on Father's Day. When I told her…