Vasir

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Vasir

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 25 February 1992 (24 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 97264
  • Number of comments : 127
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Vasir : "Don't lay a cloak of guilt around my shoulders because others are evil."
"those who have come here to hate should leave now, for in their hatred they only betray themselves"

Vasir's page activity

Visits<b>28actress</b> - the 09/11/2016 at 6:32am<b>ItsUhUnicorn</b> - the 06/29/2016 at 9:52am<b>Sansational_</b> - the 04/14/2016 at 10:43am<b>bolee997</b> - the 04/05/2016 at 1:25pm<b>awishadahbau5</b> - the 03/27/2016 at 1:24am<b>pixierara</b> - the 03/18/2016 at 7:16pm<b>ThatOtherPug</b> - the 01/21/2016 at 6:59pm<b>karacakal2</b> - the 01/08/2016 at 8:07am<b>Aukrenchi</b> - the 01/03/2016 at 4:02am<b>sjb_2015</b> - the 12/14/2015 at 9:13am<b>Baron_Kaz</b> - the 12/11/2015 at 7:19pm<b>sarika</b> - the 12/08/2015 at 9:59am<b>thefmlman2011</b> - the 12/08/2015 at 12:47am<b>chronicB</b> - the 10/20/2015 at 12:23am<b>storm_silver</b> - the 09/29/2015 at 4:43am<b>ratman775</b> - the 09/02/2015 at 6:32am<b>neonvortex</b> - the 08/23/2015 at 9:52pm<b>StrangeNigga</b> - the 05/22/2015 at 2:35pm

Vasir's FML badges

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

Vasir's favorite FMLs

Today, while walking down the street, a homeless man walked up to me. He opened his mouth to say something and I immediately said that I didn't have any spare change because I was late for work. He then said "I was gonna ask you for the time, dickwad". Apparently he wasn't homeless. FML

by NoNaMe / 06/04/2009 at 4:07am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, my dad asked me to move a potted plant from one side of the yard to the other. It looked like a very heavy pot, so I heaved it up with all my might. Turns out it was one of those heavy-looking ones that are actually light plastic. I fell over backwards and dumped dirt into my mouth. FML

by ether10 / 06/04/2009 at 2:27am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I meant to express to my friends that I was enamored with a young saleswoman I had encountered at a store. I wanted to tell them that she was quite petite and that I am, in general, attracted to petite women. Instead I said "You know? I like little girls." FML

by boinger / 06/03/2009 at 1:23am / United States (California) / Love

Today, I was taking a nap. Apparently, my two year old daughter decided to crawl on top of the covers on my bed because she was scared since there was a thunder storm. I thought she was one of our cats so I kicked her off. She hit the wall. FML

by fmlfmlfml / 06/02/2009 at 2:03pm / United States (California) / Animals

Today, I had to give a presentation about Adolf Hitler. I wanted to point out he was a very good speaker, and could incite a crowd. Instead, what came out was 'Hitler's oral skills made everyone go wild with excitement" FML

by Cail / 06/01/2009 at 7:12pm / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, while shopping in the FML store I bought the "Retro Sport Tee," I didn't notice you are supposed to put your own "FML" on the shirt. Mine says "Today, Your Text Here. FML." FML

by deucelututi / 05/31/2009 at 8:03am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up with a hangover after an intense night out. I decided to look at my camera to figure out what happened the night before. All my pictures were deleted except one video of me dancing to Lollipop by Lil Wayne, and giving a lapdance and head to my giant plush rat. FML

by crunkdrunk / 05/31/2009 at 1:48am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I tried to imitate Mary Poppins by jumping off a shed with an umbrella. I spent the next 3 hours in the emergency room. My leg is broken. FML

by Anonymous / 05/29/2009 at 11:04pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, I tried to imitate Mary Poppins by jumping off a shed with an umbrella. I spent the next 3 hours in the emergency room. My leg is broken. FML

by Anonymous / 05/29/2009 at 11:04pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to the store to buy groceries. I didn't care how I looked, so I wore an old shirt that said, "Thousands of my potential children died on your daughter's face last night." I ran into my girlfriend's parents at the store. FML

by helloitsbrian6969 / 05/24/2009 at 3:50pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was straightening my hair when I heard this crunching, sizzling sound. Taking the flat iron away, I realized that I had just fused a spider to my hair with the heat. FML

by beatricesank / 05/23/2009 at 10:03am / Canada (British Columbia) / Animals

Today, I was straightening my hair when I heard this crunching, sizzling sound. Taking the flat iron away, I realized that I had just fused a spider to my hair with the heat. FML

by beatricesank / 05/23/2009 at 10:03am / Canada (British Columbia) / Animals

Today, I woke up to a hand rubbing my very erect penis, and a woman's peppermint breath in my ear. "Mom?" I called out instinctively, recalling how she always smells like peppermint. The hand stopped rubbing, and I turned to face my very disgusted looking girlfriend of three years. FML

by Ohshit / 05/17/2009 at 2:42am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend and I were "fooling around." It started to get hot and he took out his penis for the first time. This was the first one I've seen in real life so I decided I'd complimented it. I had no idea what to say so I said, "It's pretty." FML

by madzlovesgee / 05/16/2009 at 1:44pm / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

Today, I took a call. Wrong number. A few seconds later, they called back and I told her that she had the wrong number. She said she just hit redial and didn't understand how she got me again. I tried to explain how redial works. She called me a moron and hung up. Then my phone rang again. FML

by Anonymous / 05/12/2009 at 1:39pm / United States (Minnesota) / Work