About Vasir : "Don't lay a cloak of guilt around my shoulders because others are evil."
"those who have come here to hate should leave now, for in their hatred they only betray themselves"
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You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.
It’s in the can
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Today, my daughter turned 11. Since she LOVES Harry Potter, I decided to write her an acceptance letter to Hogwarts. When she saw the letter, she screamed and showed me. When she found out I wrote it, she told me she hated me, started crying, and stepped on my foot. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24393) - you deserved it (78049)
On 07/16/2009 at 6:16am - kids - by notawizard (woman) - Spain (Catalonia)
Today, at the end of a night of heavy drinking, I decided it was a good idea to go off into the park with a friend of mine. We ended up fooling around in the park, when a couple of kids stole our clothes. We had to walk back to town with no clothes on. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10510) - you deserved it (62338)
On 07/16/2009 at 2:15am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, I was cuddling with my boyfriend watching a movie, my boyfriend then leans in and says: "You know, you're my favourite girlfriend." I then jokingly responded by saying: "You say that like I'm not the only girlfriend you have right now." I hate being right. FML
I agree, your life sucks (49017) - you deserved it (3387)
On 07/14/2009 at 10:02am - misc - by dinapar (woman) - Canada (Manitoba)
Today, my friend posted my picture on Craigslist under the "men seeking men" section. I got 16 replies with 2 hours. He then decided to post another picture of me under "men seeking women" to compare results. The only reply I got was from a man. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38301) - you deserved it (2783)
On 07/13/2009 at 9:09am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I bought a CD off a man who always plays Spanish guitar in the subway. When I got to work and tried playing the CD, it was blank. I paid $15 for a blank CD. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29226) - you deserved it (14990)
On 07/12/2009 at 10:30pm - misc - by Raaaaaaarrrrrr (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I have to choose between one eyebrow or none because I'm a heavy sleeper and my brother is a moron. FML
I agree, your life sucks (51309) - you deserved it (3609)
On 07/11/2009 at 4:02pm - misc - by wow (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I worked up the courage to ask my crush out for coffee after work. She agreed and I confidently said "Alright, it's a date!" She replied, "Haha a date with you? I'm just going for the free coffee!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (43431) - you deserved it (2856)
On 07/10/2009 at 9:08pm - love - by negromancer - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I went to my friend's house for the first time. As I was pulling up, I called him and asked him if I could use his bathroom. He told me to just go in the back and use it, so i did. As i'm sitting on the toilet, someone knocks on the door and asks me who I am. It wasn't my friend's house. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44202) - you deserved it (8178)
On 07/10/2009 at 5:22pm - misc - by whitewater_al (man) - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, my little brother learned that breaking a glow stick and emptying it into someone's eyes does not help them see in the dark. It's a good lesson, I just wish he hadn't used my eyes to learn it. The doctor says the burning feeling should go away in 3 or 4 days. FML
I agree, your life sucks (43901) - you deserved it (3504)
On 07/05/2009 at 12:10pm - health - by blinded (man) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, at work, a woman came up to the counter and asked if we made sweet and sour chicken. Before I could answer, she told me a really long recipe and said "I expect to see this on the menu next time I come in, or I will complain to the manager about your lousy work ethic". I work at Starbucks. FML
I agree, your life sucks (59751) - you deserved it (2741)
On 07/05/2009 at 1:21am - work - by Barista (man) - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, my girlfriend left me. The reason? She's not actually a lesbian. She has been using our relationship to piss off her conservative parents. We've been together for over a year, and I've been in love with her for over five. FML
I agree, your life sucks (57475) - you deserved it (6154)
On 07/02/2009 at 9:33pm - love - by heart-broken (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, my daughter asked me what the youngest age you should start having sex is, being a good mom, I said that she shouldn't have sex until after she's been married. My daughter then said, "Oh... shoot," and walked away. My daughter is twelve. FML
I agree, your life sucks (62676) - you deserved it (9117)
On 06/29/2009 at 8:40pm - intimacy - by blazer - United States (Minnesota)
Today, I was riding the subway to work. Barely anyone was on because of how early it was. Me and this one guy in a trench coat were in the same cart. His stop came. He walked by me, flashed me, rubbed his penis on my arm, and then ran away really fast. FML
I agree, your life sucks (101351) - you deserved it (6284)
On 06/27/2009 at 4:20am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Japan
Today, I learned my 40 year old father is marrying a girl barely a year and a half older than me. She told me not to be afraid to call her mom. I was torn between punching her in the face and vomiting. FML
I agree, your life sucks (58182) - you deserved it (2087)
On 06/27/2009 at 1:32am - misc - by OfCourse (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, my friend told me that semen was inflammable. Later at night I jacked off into a sock and then, excitedly, tried to lit the sock on fire. Turns out, semen is very much not inflammable. Naked, I shook my sock in the air so it would extinguish while my semen splashed out all over my room. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6220) - you deserved it (87407)
On 06/27/2009 at 12:41am - intimacy - by notinflammable (man) - United States (Rhode Island)
Friday 24 May 2013
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