Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Vamphyre73

Online | Search for a member

Vamphyre73

0Fucked!

Vamphyre73
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 12 November 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 6699
  • Number of comments : 20
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Vamphyre73 : I am weird, and will rarely comment, only if I think I should get in on an arguement of something I have experience with. I love messages so feel free, although I mostly use my iPod so may not respond. Thanks for visiting!
^ ~ ^

Vamphyre73's page activity

Visits<b>vividpictures</b> - the 08/04/2014 at 2:00pm<b>Saub</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 12:37am<b>GuyNoOneKnows</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 11:35am<b>andy594328</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 1:46am<b>ariastyles12</b> - the 04/23/2014 at 4:19pm<b>LilTiki559</b> - the 03/13/2014 at 5:20pm<b>BEASTSLAYER2474</b> - the 03/02/2014 at 8:04pm<b>TrackGirl19</b> - the 02/20/2014 at 11:36pm<b>windell</b> - the 02/16/2014 at 11:15pm<b>shivamtrivedi</b> - the 02/15/2014 at 8:18am<b>Kyuzomi</b> - the 02/10/2014 at 8:58am<b>DementedOtaku</b> - the 12/11/2013 at 9:07pm<b>TheImaginarySong</b> - the 11/30/2013 at 11:21pm<b>ChenEighty</b> - the 11/28/2013 at 6:31pm<b>hannah213</b> - the 11/15/2013 at 12:34am<b>sarcasticlover</b> - the 10/18/2013 at 6:48am<b>TEZZ</b> - the 10/01/2013 at 9:52am<b>27BronxBombers</b> - the 07/13/2013 at 12:30am

Vamphyre73's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

See all of Vamphyre73's badges

Vamphyre73's favorite FMLs

Today, I discovered that when my professor had said "For every A there will be an F," he was deadly serious. I earned a 94% mark, which in this class is known as a D. FML

#19684129
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26862) - you deserved it (1956)

On 05/26/2012 at 3:34pm - misc - by dany - United States (Ohio)

Today, I woke up to a really cold feeling down below. I opened my eyes and saw my girlfriend grinning like a maniac and holding my crotch-sausage between two scissor blades. I screamed in terror like a little bitch, and she says I'm never gonna live this down. FML

#19506149
430 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45050) - you deserved it (4124)

On 04/21/2012 at 1:38pm - intimacy - by Hakimstah (man) - Lebanon

Today, I was stopped and searched by a cop, and he quickly found the bag of weed in my pocket. He didn't arrest or fine me, but he did confiscate my weed and told me to "get lost." Pretty sure I just got legally mugged. FML

#19449472
467 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15110) - you deserved it (38511)

On 04/11/2012 at 12:25pm - misc - by erockinthesuburb (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I choked on a gummy bear and ended up in the emergency room. The first thing the doctor said to me was, "Well, that must have been 'beary' uncomfortable." The entire room burst into laughter. FML

#19222956
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25502) - you deserved it (7748)

On 03/05/2012 at 7:43pm - health - by Kayla - United States

Today, I was talking to a guy I really liked, hoping that he would ask me out. Eventually he asked for my number. I was so excited that I couldn't remember it. FML

#19091459
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23262) - you deserved it (7770)

On 02/16/2012 at 2:32am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my bra burst apart in the middle of class. I then had the privilege of asking my male teacher if I could borrow his stapler to put it back together. FML

#19067640
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28724) - you deserved it (4094)

On 02/13/2012 at 7:28pm - misc - by chlolivia (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was looking through some old family photos. I don't know what the hell was going on in my head, but I idly double-tapped on one to zoom in. They were prints. FML

#19042625
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8462) - you deserved it (25006)

On 02/10/2012 at 5:17pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I finally got up the courage to tell my boyfriend of a year and a half that I love him. His response was to start to snore, pretending to be asleep. FML

#19028650
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24958) - you deserved it (3513)

On 02/08/2012 at 7:07pm - love - by c -

Today, the girl I have a crush on texted me to go out tonight. When I got to her house, she peered at me quizzically and asked, "What do you want? Did I text you?" FML

#19007190
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28914) - you deserved it (2051)

On 02/06/2012 at 12:35am - love - by hudd357mag (man) - United States

Today, the man of my dreams kissed me. It was everything I had imagined it would be until in the middle of the kiss, he burped. FML

#18991007
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30073) - you deserved it (3598)

On 02/04/2012 at 9:52am - love - by ac-hoo (woman) - India (Delhi)

Today, I was on a date with a guy I've been crushing on. In the middle of the dinner, he said he had to go get something from his car. When I asked what it was, he smiled and said it was a surprise. I waited for my surprise for half an hour. Then I decided to pay the bill and go home and cry. FML

#18976256
246 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55186) - you deserved it (3414)

On 02/02/2012 at 1:00pm - love - by kingpig (woman) - Sweden (Skane Lan)

Today, I flew to England to visit my boyfriend, who has been working there for the past three months. I went to his hotel and waited for him; he never showed up. I called one of his colleagues to ask him what was going on. He had no idea what I was talking about. FML

#18968998
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33485) - you deserved it (3349)

On 02/01/2012 at 2:31pm - love - by mareda (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I was texting the guy I like. He's really smart, funny, athletic, and cute. This all changed when he told me he was jacking off. FML

#18956321
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26211) - you deserved it (8318)

On 01/30/2012 at 9:50pm - intimacy - by idrathernotgiveoutmyname (woman) - Canada

Today, my boyfriend and I shared our first kiss. When I leaned in on him, he fell over backwards and smashed his head against the floor. FML

#18880094
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24835) - you deserved it (3621)

On 01/22/2012 at 1:06pm - love - by Anonymous - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I was texting a guy that one of my friends told me about. She gave me his number and told me about how he was deaf. Three hours into great conversation I forgot and asked him what his favorite music was. FML

#18875593
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25883) - you deserved it (10667)

On 01/21/2012 at 11:17pm - love - by Scumbagmemory (woman) - United States (Maryland)



FML's blog

  • FML with pics? That's FML Pics
  • They say that a picture is worth a thousand words. We reckoned pictures could be worth 300 characters, which is why we launched FML Pics. The name says it all, really: it's an FML app, only with…

Monday 3 August 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: