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Vamphyre73

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Vamphyre73
  • Town/Country : collingwood, canada
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 12 November 1973 (39 years)
  • Number of visits : 1252
  • Number of comments : 15
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Vamphyre73 : I am weird, and will rarely comment, only if I think I should get in on an arguement of something I have experience with. I love messages so feel free, although I mostly use my iPod so may not respond. For anyone who actually looked at my profile I am actually only 17, and that will probably automatically make me seem immature and simple-minded to you. But I'll try not to be, stalker ^ ~ ^

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Vamphyre73's favorite FMLs

Today, I was called by my son's school to pick him up. Apparently, he snorted baking soda, crushed aspirin, and flour because he thought it was coke. Where did I go wrong raising this twerp? FML

#16154478
224 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27390) - you deserved it (11197)

On 05/13/2011 at 3:20am - kids - by eenkoekje -

Today, I finally mustered the courage to tell my crush how I feel. He's a straight-A student and very nice in general. After I finished pouring my heart out, he stared at me for a bit and then said: "Nice rack." FML

#16114978
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30552) - you deserved it (8870)

On 05/10/2011 at 4:36am - intimacy - by Dana (woman) - Netherlands (Utrecht)

Today, after being out of the closet for over three years, I learned that some of my friends still don't believe me that I am really a lesbian. They still think I made the whole thing up because I can't get a man. FML

#16099797
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29498) - you deserved it (5839)

On 05/09/2011 at 12:03am - love - by Just_do_it_17 (woman) - United States

Today, I was sword fighting in a play when I accidentally hit the other person in the head. He called me a bitch and stormed off stage, leaving me alone with an audience of 50. FML

#15985252
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22026) - you deserved it (3550)

On 04/30/2011 at 12:25am - misc - by me - United States

Today, my football coach thought it would be a good idea to get drunk, run to the other sideline, and scream, "WELCOME TO SPARTA, BITCH!" This would've been funny if he weren't also my dad. FML

#15960632
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29068) - you deserved it (2841)

On 04/28/2011 at 6:28am - misc - by spartanson -

Today, it is both my birthday and Easter. My whole family came into town and my mom made a big dinner with all of my favorite foods. After church, I took a nap. When I woke up, all the food, including my cake, was gone. No one thought to wake me up. FML

#15910570
222 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28930) - you deserved it (4873)

On 04/24/2011 at 4:55pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, my girlfriend told me she is only going out with me because I look like the person she really wants to go out with. FML

#15881696
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30848) - you deserved it (2479)

On 04/22/2011 at 1:53am - love - by AngryBirdman -

Today, I watched a YouTube video at work because I was bored. I forgot I was on a conference call and my computer's desktop was shared with 15 other people. No one said anything till it ended. FML

#15881339
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6090) - you deserved it (28455)

On 04/22/2011 at 1:20am - work - by anonymous -

Today, while having sex with my girlfriend, she tells me that the flab on my stomach does not turn her on, and stops in the middle of it. Therefore, until my diet is over, guess who doesn't get any. FML

#15881226
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26001) - you deserved it (16471)

On 04/22/2011 at 1:08am - intimacy - by HotACE -

Today, I had to console my drunk dad over his girlfriend breaking up with him. When he said, "You know why we broke up don't you?" I replied, "Yeah, you were fighting a lot, right?" Wrong. I then had to explain to him that his erectile dysfunction wasn't something to be embarrassed about. FML

#15879930
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26230) - you deserved it (2295)

On 04/21/2011 at 10:55pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Belfast)

Today, I was walking along when I saw this girl kissing her boyfriend. I thought to myself "I wish I had a boyfriend like that". I'm a guy, and straight. At least I thought I was. FML

#15678976
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28158) - you deserved it (10023)

On 04/07/2011 at 11:15am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, while discussing having sex for the first time with my boyfriend, I asked what method of birth control we should use. He replied, "Anal." FML

#15627116
288 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40476) - you deserved it (10807)

On 04/03/2011 at 9:46pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, on my 21st birthday, a relative asked me if I was still engaged to the love of my life. The man I spent several years with, gave my virginity to, moved across the country for, who promised to marry me before my 21st, and who swore he was over his ex for good. No, but thanks for asking. FML

#15565101
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29142) - you deserved it (6671)

On 03/30/2011 at 7:53pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, my friends sat me down and said they were concerned I was self-harming. I don't self-harm, I'm just a massive klutz. They don't believe me, and want me to get professional help. And now, because I found it all so funny, they think I'm mentally unhinged. FML

#15560826
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22592) - you deserved it (3243)

On 03/30/2011 at 1:28pm - misc - by Alisha (woman) - United Kingdom (Stirling)

Today, I got a call from my 8 year old son's teacher. Apparently, my kid has been charging girls a quarter to touch his "special area." FML

#15472026
401 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41739) - you deserved it (6420)

On 03/24/2011 at 8:43pm - misc - by omg - Canada (Alberta)



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