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Vamphyre73

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Vamphyre73
  • Town/Country : collingwood, canada
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 12 November 1973 (40 years)
  • Number of visits : 2302
  • Number of comments : 20
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Vamphyre73 : I am weird, and will rarely comment, only if I think I should get in on an arguement of something I have experience with. I love messages so feel free, although I mostly use my iPod so may not respond. For anyone who actually looked at my profile I am actually only 17, and that will probably automatically make me seem immature and simple-minded to you. But I'll try not to be, stalker ^ ~ ^

Vamphyre73's last visitors

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Vamphyre73's FML badges

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

See all of Vamphyre73's badges

Vamphyre73's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to a library to return a book that I've had for years. After a heated discussion with the librarian, not only did she charge me over a hundred dollars for the book, she also called the cops to escort me out. FML

#20595392
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20405) - you deserved it (37765)

On 04/16/2013 at 12:01am - money - by LoLWut?? nd Why?? - United States

Today, I had a friend "dump" me over Facebook. She apparently thought we were dating. I'm a gay man who's lived with his partner for 5 years. She says I have commitment issues. FML

#20583902
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41869) - you deserved it (4302)

On 04/10/2013 at 6:17pm - love - by drama king? (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I shaved my pubic area for my fiancé. He told me it looked "like Frodo tried to hack off Gandalf's beard with Gimli's ax." FML

Today, I went to visit some family out of state for my niece's birthday. I couldn't think of what to get an 8-year-old so I got her a Barbie doll. Everyone else got her money, iPods, game consoles, etc. When she got to mine she asked "how do I turn it on?" Then threw it away when she couldn't. FML

#20568124
310 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39649) - you deserved it (3305)

On 03/31/2013 at 9:32am - kids - by The_Black_Jesus - United States

Today, after I had changed my number to get away from my abusive ex, my mom decided to give him my new one. She insists that I need to give him another chance. FML

#20556707
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44966) - you deserved it (2134)

On 03/23/2013 at 4:15pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, I was taking a patient's blood pressure, and listening for his pulse with my stethoscope. I couldn't hear anything, so I adjusted the cuff and tried again. Still no pulse. He pointed out that my stethoscope was the wrong way around and sneered, "You been smokin' the reefer, boy?" FML

#20535043
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11635) - you deserved it (29749)

On 03/07/2013 at 7:35pm - work - by no sir I have not (man) - United States

Today, it's my boyfriend's birthday. He really likes Legend of Zelda, so I put on a Link hat, took my clothes off, and waited for him at his place. He came home with a hooker. FML

#20502217
172 comments

Today, I went on another date with a guy I've had a crush on for a long time. Afterwards, we went back to my place for the first time and things got heated. While taking my pants off, he recoiled and asked if I thought it was still No Shave November. FML

#20479641
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24554) - you deserved it (41552)

On 01/26/2013 at 12:20pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, trying to be sweet, I told my girlfriend that I'm so happy we met one another. She muttered, "Well, that makes one of us." FML

#20453944
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27744) - you deserved it (2668)

On 01/11/2013 at 5:22pm - misc - by wtf did i do?? (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I woke up after sleeping with my boyfriend for the first time. I rolled over and smiled at him, and the first thing he said was, "You farted. A lot." FML

#20446049
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25498) - you deserved it (5488)

On 01/07/2013 at 10:40am - love - by gassy - United States (Texas)

Today, after sharing my first night in bed with my boyfriend, I woke up early, and decided to rouse him with some surprise oral. It didn't go so well; he woke up screaming and gasped, "OH MY GOD! I thought you were my cat!" before telling me to continue. FML

#20412240
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32458) - you deserved it (5454)

On 12/21/2012 at 8:16pm - intimacy - by anonymaiacciu (woman) - France

Today, at a Christmas party, my crush came up to me and cutely pointed out that I was standing under mistletoe. The only response my stupid brain could think of was, "Probably full of nargles though." He gave me a confused look and walked away. FML

#20402533
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24703) - you deserved it (11922)

On 12/16/2012 at 6:51pm - love - by Rhine (woman) - Barbados (Saint Michael)

Today, my daughter finally gave birth to twin boys. She informed me that she named them Peregrin Took and Meriadoc Brandybuck. My grandsons are named after Hobbits. FML

#20194616
251 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24741) - you deserved it (4861)

On 12/06/2012 at 11:49pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I was reading a book in public. Some bastard stranger came over and started spoiling the plot for me. FML

#20148752
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18991) - you deserved it (1755)

On 11/05/2012 at 10:58am - misc - by Spoilicious - Singapore

Today, I received another death threat for teaching evolution in college. I'm a geology teacher. FML

#20121974
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23044) - you deserved it (2148)

On 10/18/2012 at 12:58am - work - by satanworshipper - United States (Florida)



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