UndeadMongrel

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Offline (the 03/01/2015 at 6:49pm)

UndeadMongrel

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 8 December 1993 (22 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3904
  • Number of comments : 5
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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UndeadMongrel's page activity

Visits<b>jill97</b> - the 01/21/2016 at 2:23am<b>Meriwether</b> - the 11/08/2015 at 10:05pm<b>dusthar</b> - the 02/14/2015 at 6:32am<b>54MU31</b> - the 01/10/2015 at 8:41pm<b>simplysarcastics</b> - the 09/07/2014 at 11:28pm<b>Yogibob</b> - the 03/22/2014 at 5:31pm<b>goldengirlsfan</b> - the 12/30/2013 at 9:25pm<b>ellllea</b> - the 11/28/2013 at 11:15pm<b>jaffvis</b> - the 08/03/2013 at 12:46am<b>IHATEFMYLIFE</b> - the 07/29/2013 at 5:01am<b>Mornai</b> - the 06/02/2013 at 4:00pm<b>meaganmb</b> - the 04/17/2013 at 7:52pm<b>BestOfAll</b> - the 03/17/2013 at 8:24pm<b>vantha</b> - the 03/12/2013 at 10:51am<b>crazycatbitch</b> - the 03/11/2013 at 10:17pm<b>OnlyAvailableID</b> - the 03/11/2013 at 3:49pm<b>JennaShock</b> - the 03/11/2013 at 2:25pm

Fucked!<b>dusthar</b> - the 02/14/2015 at 12:32pm

UndeadMongrel's FML badges

Consolation prize

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Keen reader – Level: student ninja

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Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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UndeadMongrel's favorite FMLs

Today, I was at the supermarket checkout. I handed over my items, which included some tampons, tissues, and toilet roll. The security guard standing beside the cashier remarked loudly, "I'll be damned; she's flowing from every hole!" FML

by lafinesse / 05/14/2012 at 6:23pm / Miscellaneous

Today, after several years of having her help me out by doing household chores, I bought my fifteen-year-old daughter a new pair of jeans. Her reaction was to squeal, "Master has presented Dobby with clothes. Dobby is free!" FML

by Anonymous / 04/13/2012 at 10:06pm / France / Miscellaneous

Today, I watched my cat walk to her litter box, look at it, then walk across the room to pee on a backpack. FML

by tessamarque / 04/05/2012 at 11:07am / United States (Oklahoma) / Animals

Today, I watched my cat walk to her litter box, look at it, then walk across the room to pee on a backpack. FML

by tessamarque / 04/05/2012 at 11:07am / United States (Oklahoma) / Animals

Today, I felt manly. I spent almost the entire day peeling paint, power sanding, and applying Spackle for my grandma. Strutting with masculinity, I headed for the shower, only to let out a womanly yelp at a spider hanging at eye level around a corner. Manliness gone. FML

by Anonymous / 03/29/2012 at 9:54pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, I gave in and let my friend give me a makeover. She couldn't find my eyelash curler, but decided that if she used scissors lightly, it would work just the same. Needless to say, it did not work. FML

by neveragain / 03/16/2012 at 1:11am / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend and I decided it was time to lose our virginity. After our clothes were removed, we spent 30 minutes trying to figure out how to actually have sex, and eventually gave up. FML

by Anonymous / 03/10/2012 at 2:23am / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

Today, I was humming the Star Wars theme song while on the bus. When my stop came I walked down the aisle only to hear a girl mutter, "The virginity is strong in this one." She's right. FML

by starboy / 03/10/2012 at 1:50am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I learned that lemonade and urine look very similar to one another. I also learned that they taste very different. FML

by iVaughtTV / 02/28/2012 at 5:44pm / United States (Indiana) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. He let me know by shaving "CYA" into my dog's fur and then moving out before I got home from work. FML

by Anonymous / 02/15/2012 at 2:26pm / United States (South Carolina) / Love

Today, while I was at work, my boyfriend decided to give my Cocker Spaniel a haircut. I now have the equivalent of an over-sized naked mole rat running around my house. FML

by workaholic / 02/15/2012 at 6:09am / United States (Florida) / Animals

Today, my girlfriend openly mocked me, calling me an idiot for thinking seahorses are real. She insists that they're like unicorns, and only exist in fiction. FML

by BoringFucker / 02/06/2012 at 4:52pm / United Kingdom (Lancashire) / Animals

Today, my mom was freaking out about me handling a CD-ROM with my bare hands. When I asked her what all the commotion was about, she said she was worried that I would catch "one of those computer viruses" she'd heard about on the news. FML

Today, I sold my Xbox and Kinect to a guy. I forgot that sometimes I'd play Dance Central naked, and the Kinect would make videos. This guy now has videos of me, naked, badly dancing. FML

by anonymous / 01/13/2012 at 12:05am / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous

Today, my mother came home from the grocery store with a 20kg bag of carrots, and nothing else. She then informed me that, for as long as my girlfriend and I keep 'going at it like rabbits', she would be feeding me like one. FML

by Danny / 01/07/2012 at 5:27am / Australia / Intimacy