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Twaffle

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Twaffle
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 741
  • Number of comments : 9
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Twaffle : Ah!

Twaffle's last visitors

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Twaffle's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

Twaffle's favorite FMLs

Today, I discovered that my girlfriend can only orgasm when we have sex to gospel music. FML

#15613942
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45780) - you deserved it (5511)

On 04/03/2011 at 12:10am - intimacy - by cantgetup (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I got a call from my 8 year old son's teacher. Apparently, my kid has been charging girls a quarter to touch his "special area." FML

#15472026
402 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42540) - you deserved it (6477)

On 03/24/2011 at 8:43pm - misc - by omg - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my girlfriend haltingly dumped me over the phone. Faint splashes punctuated her grunting, straining sounds. FML

#15264127
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28100) - you deserved it (2813)

On 03/10/2011 at 4:42pm - love - by dumped (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I dreamed I was getting married. I was wearing a white dress, had incredible cleavage and perfectly done makeup. Just one problem. I'm a guy. FML

#14968643
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44127) - you deserved it (8911)

On 02/14/2011 at 1:24am - misc - by bride (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I found my electric globe. It asks you where a state, country or city is and you would have to find it and click on it with the pen. I also found out that my parents would sneak into my room at night, take it and play 'strip-globe'. FML

#14708119
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19669) - you deserved it (2228)

On 01/25/2011 at 9:10am - intimacy - by Charlotte -

Today, my uncle had a flashback to Vietnam. I'm now missing a tooth and have a cracked rib. FML

#14706011
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34356) - you deserved it (2892)

On 01/25/2011 at 2:28am - misc - by Randall (man) - United States (California)

Today, I figured out why my name is Ashley. In order to tell my older sister about getting a new little sister, my parents thought it would be a good idea to make her imaginary friend "Ashley" real. FML

#14244337
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22056) - you deserved it (2089)

On 12/18/2010 at 4:03am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I was making out with this guy, and I ask him if he wants to take my bra off. He has some trouble getting it off and says, "This is strange, I do it for my sister all the time." FML

#14129951
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45868) - you deserved it (5373)

On 12/08/2010 at 9:34am - intimacy - by fme (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my grandma was leaning over in front of me, vacuuming, while wearing a v-neck shirt. Out of instinct, I glanced at her chest. She's 75. I checked out my 75 year old grandma. FML

#14051903
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8681) - you deserved it (50861)

On 12/01/2010 at 8:14pm - love - by agentile (man) - United States

Today, my family and I argued whether getting a period or boner in the middle of class was worse. At the dinner table. FML

#12986098
378 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25294) - you deserved it (11784)

On 09/10/2010 at 1:30am - intimacy - by Me - United States (Washington)

Today, I drew a face on a balloon and pretended to make out with it. The balloon popped and shot to the back of my throat, where it got caught. FML

#11831310
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9694) - you deserved it (51587)

On 07/12/2010 at 3:42pm - health - by jazthefish (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I found out that my best friend kisses me while I sleep. We're both guys. FML

#10975690
311 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60941) - you deserved it (7587)

On 06/04/2010 at 10:03pm - love - by weirdesout - United States (Texas)

Today, I found a $100 bill on the ground and was thinking, "I'm so lucky!!" I opened my wallet to find that $300 was missing. I looked back and saw some guy picking up $300. FML

#8750988
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20014) - you deserved it (5627)

On 03/01/2010 at 4:55pm - money - by sdauner - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I was bored at work looking at a sex offender list of my area. After a couple pages, I saw my uncle. FML

#8638968
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36850) - you deserved it (2149)

On 02/25/2010 at 12:44pm - intimacy - by grossuncle (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was sent to the hospital for being knocked out with a potato. FML

#7290118
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24884) - you deserved it (3442)

On 01/11/2010 at 10:40pm - health - by brileyyyy - United States (Missouri)



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