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About Twaffle : Ah!
How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I discovered that my girlfriend can only orgasm when we have sex to gospel music. FML
I agree, your life sucks (41428) - you deserved it (4436)
On 04/03/2011 at 12:10am - intimacy - by cantgetup (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I got a call from my 8 year old son's teacher. Apparently, my kid has been charging girls a quarter to touch his "special area." FML
I agree, your life sucks (39959) - you deserved it (6220)
Today, my girlfriend haltingly dumped me over the phone. Faint splashes punctuated her grunting, straining sounds. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24753) - you deserved it (2551)
On 03/10/2011 at 4:42pm - love - by dumped (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I dreamed I was getting married. I was wearing a white dress, had incredible cleavage and perfectly done makeup. Just one problem. I'm a guy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37734) - you deserved it (7269)
On 02/14/2011 at 1:24am - misc - by bride (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I found my electric globe. It asks you where a state, country or city is and you would have to find it and click on it with the pen. I also found out that my parents would sneak into my room at night, take it and play 'strip-globe'. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16916) - you deserved it (1795)
On 01/25/2011 at 9:10am - intimacy - by Charlotte -
Today, my uncle had a flashback to Vietnam. I'm now missing a tooth and have a cracked rib. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28102) - you deserved it (2200)
On 01/25/2011 at 2:28am - misc - by Randall (man) - United States (California)
Today, I figured out why my name is Ashley. In order to tell my older sister about getting a new little sister, my parents thought it would be a good idea to make her imaginary friend "Ashley" real. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19388) - you deserved it (1897)
On 12/18/2010 at 4:03am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Indiana)
Today, I was making out with this guy, and I ask him if he wants to take my bra off. He has some trouble getting it off and says, "This is strange, I do it for my sister all the time." FML
I agree, your life sucks (38145) - you deserved it (4101)
On 12/08/2010 at 9:34am - intimacy - by fme (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, my grandma was leaning over in front of me, vacuuming, while wearing a v-neck shirt. Out of instinct, I glanced at her chest. She's 75. I checked out my 75 year old grandma. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7160) - you deserved it (39165)
On 12/01/2010 at 8:14pm - love - by agentile (man) - United States
Today, my family and I argued whether getting a period or boner in the middle of class was worse. At the dinner table. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19829) - you deserved it (9531)
On 09/10/2010 at 1:30am - intimacy - by Me - United States (Washington)
Today, I drew a face on a balloon and pretended to make out with it. The balloon popped and shot to the back of my throat, where it got caught. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8938) - you deserved it (47909)
On 07/12/2010 at 3:42pm - health - by jazthefish (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I found out that my best friend kisses me while I sleep. We're both guys. FML
I agree, your life sucks (54100) - you deserved it (6045)
On 06/04/2010 at 10:03pm - love - by weirdesout - United States (Texas)
Today, I found a $100 bill on the ground and was thinking, "I'm so lucky!!" I opened my wallet to find that $300 was missing. I looked back and saw some random guy picking up $300. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16192) - you deserved it (4279)
On 03/01/2010 at 4:55pm - money - by sdauner - United States (Minnesota)
Today, I was bored at work looking at a sex offender list of my area. After a couple pages, I saw my uncle. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31370) - you deserved it (1584)
On 02/25/2010 at 12:44pm - intimacy - by grossuncle (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I was sent to the hospital for being knocked out with a potato. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20351) - you deserved it (2601)
On 01/11/2010 at 10:40pm - health - by brileyyyy - United States (Missouri)
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