Twaffle

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Twaffle

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1123
  • Number of comments : 9
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Twaffle : Ah!

Twaffle's page activity

Visits<b>HeyHeyFishFillet</b> - the 08/30/2013 at 11:23am<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 10:16pm<b></b> - the 01/11/2011 at 12:30pm<b>QTp13</b> - the 01/25/2010 at 11:57am<b>cb4_89</b> - the 01/13/2010 at 11:34pm

Twaffle's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

Twaffle's favorite FMLs

Today, I discovered that my girlfriend can only orgasm when we have sex to gospel music. FML

by cantgetup / 04/03/2011 at 12:10am / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, I got a call from my 8 year old son's teacher. Apparently, my kid has been charging girls a quarter to touch his "special area." FML

by omg / 03/24/2011 at 8:43pm / Canada (Alberta) / Kids

Today, my girlfriend haltingly dumped me over the phone. Faint splashes punctuated her grunting, straining sounds. FML

by dumped / 03/10/2011 at 4:42pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, I dreamed I was getting married. I was wearing a white dress, had incredible cleavage and perfectly done makeup. Just one problem. I'm a guy. FML

by bride / 02/14/2011 at 1:24am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found my electric globe. It asks you where a state, country or city is and you would have to find it and click on it with the pen. I also found out that my parents would sneak into my room at night, take it and play 'strip-globe'. FML

by Charlotte / 01/25/2011 at 9:10am / Intimacy

Today, my uncle had a flashback to Vietnam. I'm now missing a tooth and have a cracked rib. FML

by Randall / 01/25/2011 at 2:28am / United States (California) / Health

Today, I figured out why my name is Ashley. In order to tell my older sister about getting a new little sister, my parents thought it would be a good idea to make her imaginary friend "Ashley" real. FML

by Anonymous / 12/18/2010 at 4:03am / United States (Indiana) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was making out with this guy, and I ask him if he wants to take my bra off. He has some trouble getting it off and says, "This is strange, I do it for my sister all the time." FML

by fme / 12/08/2010 at 9:34am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, my grandma was leaning over in front of me, vacuuming, while wearing a v-neck shirt. Out of instinct, I glanced at her chest. She's 75. I checked out my 75 year old grandma. FML

by agentile / 12/01/2010 at 8:14pm / United States / Love

Today, my family and I argued whether getting a period or boner in the middle of class was worse. At the dinner table. FML

by Me / 09/10/2010 at 1:30am / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

Today, I drew a face on a balloon and pretended to make out with it. The balloon popped and shot to the back of my throat, where it got caught. FML

by jazthefish / 07/12/2010 at 3:42pm / United States (Illinois) / Health

Today, I found out that my best friend kisses me while I sleep. We're both guys. FML

by weirdesout / 06/04/2010 at 10:03pm / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, I found a $100 bill on the ground and was thinking, "I'm so lucky!!" I opened my wallet to find that $300 was missing. I looked back and saw some guy picking up $300. FML

by sdauner / 03/01/2010 at 4:55pm / United States (Minnesota) / Money

Today, I was bored at work looking at a sex offender list of my area. After a couple pages, I saw my uncle. FML

by grossuncle / 02/25/2010 at 12:44pm / United States (Virginia) / Intimacy

Today, I was sent to the hospital for being knocked out with a potato. FML

by brileyyyy / 01/11/2010 at 10:40pm / United States (Missouri) / Health