I come to this site every day now
always funny to see ppl with crappier lives
*evil grin*
Today, I realized that I lie to my friends online and go "offline" for hours at a time so it appears that I have a life outside of the internet. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7314) - you totally deserved it (18143)
On 10/22/2009 at 8:26am - misc - by Kimberly - France (Nord-Pas-de-Calais)
Today, I went to the bar to celebrate my friend's birthday party. I gave the bouncer my ID and he kicked me out, saying that I should at least use an ID card with the correct gender. I'm 22 and female, he thought I was an underage boy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24016) - you totally deserved it (1854)
On 09/27/2009 at 12:10am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Manitoba)
Today, I was helping my dad move into his new house. It's a 4-bedroom house and he has three kids so it's perfect. I was wandering around and noticed that the first bedroom is his, the second is my older brother's, the third is my younger sister's, and the fourth is an office. I have no room. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32014) - you totally deserved it (1307)
On 09/13/2009 at 5:23pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, whilst on a date I recieved my sixth missed call from my mother. I excused myself and went outside and called her, she and my father wanted to know why I was having dinner and holding hands with another man. It turns out they were also on a date. At the same place. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30322) - you totally deserved it (6917)
On 08/31/2009 at 9:54am - love - by crawfo (man) - Australia (Queensland)
Today, my grandma went to get my twin sister and I a birthday gift. She returned with 2 shirts that read "I see you've met the twins" in big letters across the chest. She gave them to us and said, "Isn't this cute, cause you're twins!" I then had to explain to her what the shirt was actually referring to. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32281) - you totally deserved it (1987)
On 08/14/2009 at 5:57pm - misc - by twingirl (woman) - United States (Delaware)
Today, as a joke, my friends and I decided to put me in a dress and makeup, to creep out a friend. I'm a guy. I'm not sure which is worse, the fact that I so willingly volunteered to wear the dress and the makeup, or the fact that I thought it was comfy and made me look slim. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7101) - you totally deserved it (32611)
On 08/09/2009 at 3:31am - misc - by twitch01 (man) - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, my mom went snooping through my art bin to "clean out my old drawings". She found numerous nude pieces and accused me of selling porn. My mom mistook and threw out 57 anatomy practice sketches that I worked very very hard on, and ripped up the remainder of my drawings. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35971) - you totally deserved it (1517)
On 08/08/2009 at 8:02pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New York)
Today, I saw my girlfriend going into my best friend's dorm room and suspected her to cheat on me so I placed a camera in his room to spy on them. In the end, I discovered that my girlfriend has problems in math and both my best friend and brother are gay. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9535) - you totally deserved it (47364)
On 08/08/2009 at 3:18am - love - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Quebec)
Today, my 250 lb ex-Marine dad announced he was going to start randomly punching me in the crotch, without warning, to "improve my reflexes." FML
I agree, your life sucks (43066) - you totally deserved it (2876)
On 08/02/2009 at 6:45pm - health - by theregoesmyspermcount (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, this guy I have been hanging out with for a while came over and we were about to do it. He pulled off my clothes and once I was naked I reached for his zipper. He just backed up and said he was a virgin and simply wanted to see me naked. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39024) - you totally deserved it (6736)
On 07/31/2009 at 8:56pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, my son decided to come out of the closet by wearing a shirt that said "Mom, I'm gay" to the family reunion. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27266) - you totally deserved it (13540)
On 07/25/2009 at 5:14pm - kids - by Mom (woman) - United States (Kentucky)
Today, I spent the day in jail. Apparently there was a warrant out for my arrest for ignoring a ticket I got in December. The guys in the holding area were talking about what they were arrested for: Grand theft auto, burglary, and assault. "What are you in for?" they asked. "Littering." FML
I agree, your life sucks (30404) - you totally deserved it (13053)
On 05/11/2009 at 2:52am - misc - by Jerkoff_roommate (woman) - United States (Arizona)
Today, I took a bath with what I thought was my waterproof vibrator. It wasn't. Apparently my boyfriend found me passed out in the tub from an electric shock with my vibrator floating next to me. He refused to call a doctor and insisted on interrogating me about what he's doing wrong in bed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38054) - you totally deserved it (29845)
On 05/01/2009 at 5:46am - misc - by uhoh (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)
Today, brand new cocktail dress: $300. Matching peep toe heels: $100. Getting my hair done at the salon: $80. Treating myself to a mani/pedi: $50. When finally meeting the guy I have been chatting online with for 2 months, I find out hes my cousin: priceless. FML
I agree, your life sucks (67187) - you totally deserved it (21358)
On 04/10/2009 at 2:42pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)
Today, I came home to find a sock I previously used to whack off on my bed with googly eyes and a mouth drawn on it with a note that read "Because you can't find a real girl, I made your current one prettier, Love Mom." FML
I agree, your life sucks (95958) - you totally deserved it (22433)
On 04/02/2009 at 1:13am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oregon)
