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Toxictears

Offline (the 06/25/2015 at 11:12pm) | Search for a member

Toxictears

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 22 July 1984 (31 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 775
  • Number of comments : 6
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Toxictears : outgoing..like to party..addicted to tatts..

Toxictears's page activity

Visits<b>pred8885</b> - the 07/22/2015 at 4:19pm<b>the_rude_dude</b> - the 07/22/2015 at 1:35am<b>dk1991</b> - the 07/21/2015 at 10:24pm<b>Tomfire9</b> - the 07/19/2015 at 8:38am<b>jjmack34</b> - the 06/08/2015 at 12:42am<b>MeanBeagle</b> - the 11/07/2014 at 2:04pm<b>reggie_k_dwight</b> - the 10/06/2014 at 6:59pm<b>buckdharma</b> - the 09/22/2014 at 1:33pm<b>CoGhostRider</b> - the 09/13/2014 at 9:50am<b>tj4234</b> - the 09/12/2014 at 11:12am<b>RoseWithThorns</b> - the 08/11/2014 at 2:34am<b>meb123hazel</b> - the 02/13/2014 at 4:28pm<b>rob_loves_scuba</b> - the 01/17/2014 at 6:23am<b>claire_schmidt</b> - the 06/29/2013 at 12:27pm<b>neoinlove</b> - the 08/12/2012 at 11:22am<b>qBAMFp</b> - the 08/10/2012 at 11:18pm

Fucked!<b>dk1991</b> - the 07/22/2015 at 4:24am

Toxictears's FML badges

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Who’s the fairest of them all?

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Toxictears's favorite FMLs

Today, I visited my mother's new apartment, and found a picture of yours truly hanging above her toilet, and I asked why it was there. She shrugged and said, "Because the thought of you makes me want to take a shit?" FML

#20007765
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21278) - you deserved it (2104)

On 08/07/2012 at 2:04pm - misc - by Alisha - United States (Virginia)

Today, I discovered that I sometimes talk in my sleep. After spending an amazing, perfectly romantic night with my boyfriend, I woke up to him telling me to leave. I have no idea what I could have said. He still won't talk to me. FML

#20007517
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27852) - you deserved it (2801)

On 08/07/2012 at 10:49am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I surprisingly found two empty seats on the subway. Before anyone could get to them, I rushed and triumphantly sat down, enjoying my victory, until I noticed why they were empty. I had just sat down next to a guy vigorously trying to fellate himself. FML

#20007431
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21848) - you deserved it (5760)

On 08/07/2012 at 9:19am - intimacy - by Nightmares - United States

Today, I had an upset stomach. I decided to quickly take out the trash before heading to the bathroom. As I opened the trash can lid, a raccoon jumped out. I learned the literal meaning of being scared shitless. FML

#20007279
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22287) - you deserved it (2323)

On 08/07/2012 at 5:19am - health - by TheCerealKiller - United States (California)

Today, I went to visit a friend I hadn't seen in ages who lives alone out in the country. I arrived and found the front door unlocked but no one was home. I went in anyway and helped myself to some food. Then a family I had never seen before came in, and I realized it wasn't my friend's house. FML

#20007202
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10472) - you deserved it (32016)

On 08/07/2012 at 3:48am - misc - by Embarrassed - Australia (South Australia)

Today, I was at a gas station when the cash register made a sound effect similar to one from Sonic the Hedgehog, and I pointed this out. The cashier then saw fit to go on a rant about how I need to stop focusing on video games, and get a life and a girlfriend. FML

#20006832
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20819) - you deserved it (6490)

On 08/07/2012 at 12:16am - misc - by Marcowalker95 - United States (California)

Today, my mom called me screaming and cussing because she found pot in my room. I come home and my dad says, "I hid some pot in your room and I'm not letting you go to that concert if you rat me out." My dad is apparently a blackmailing 52-year-old stoner. FML

#20006521
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29598) - you deserved it (1888)

On 08/06/2012 at 9:40pm - misc - by Joe Lizen - United States (Illinois)

Today, I had to scream for my dad to come help me, after I got my hair caught in a fan while trying to make the Darth Vader voice. FML

#20006198
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8102) - you deserved it (30173)

On 08/06/2012 at 6:08pm - misc - by :$ - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was at the store with my grandpa. When we were rung up, he started to pay for our myriad groceries in coins, and the guy behind us groaned. My grandpa said, "shut your mouth," and started ranting about how stupid people are to leave paper trails for "government spooks." FML

#20006151
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19170) - you deserved it (1923)

On 08/06/2012 at 5:37pm - money - by for fucks sake gramps (woman) - United States (Hawaii)

Today, I called in to my girlfriend's favorite radio station to propose. After spending what seemed like an eternity telling her how much I love her and I want to spend the rest of my life with her, she took a deep breath, said, "How about no?" and hung up. FML

#20005989
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30664) - you deserved it (3766)

On 08/06/2012 at 3:50pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, my boyfriend told me he was a vampire. I burst out in laughter and said he was ridiculous. He looked at me in disgust and said he couldn't be with someone who didn't trust and believe in him. I'm now single. FML

#20005230
281 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26235) - you deserved it (5200)

On 08/06/2012 at 2:37am - love - by shastadoe (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I discovered how pathetically introverted I am when during a car ride with my family, I said, "I really like this song" and my parents gasped because they didn't realize I was in the back seat. And I'm their only child. FML

#20005160
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27657) - you deserved it (2273)

On 08/06/2012 at 1:41am - misc - by mississippi123 - United States (California)

Today, I was changing my son's diaper when he said "Momma." Astonished that he'd finally spoken, I clapped and smiled proudly. My clap scared the crap out of him. Literally. FML

#20004599
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22034) - you deserved it (4523)

On 08/05/2012 at 9:10pm - kids - by milf - United States (Indiana)

Today, one of the human turds that I stupidly added on Facebook posted how terrible her life is after her dad refused to arrange yet another holiday for her this year, so I bitched her out for being such a spoiled little brat. A few hours later, her boyfriend came over and beat the shit out of me. FML

#19996782
305 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29416) - you deserved it (32501)

On 08/01/2012 at 4:59pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Bedfordshire)

Today, I continued my habit of saying, "It smells like lung cancer over here" any time I see a smoker. This guy turned out to be an amateur MMA fighter, and I was his "workout" for the day. I guess his lungs are doing fine. FML



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