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Offline (the 02/13/2016 at 9:07pm)



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 22 July 1984 (32 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1288
  • Number of comments : 6
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Toxictears : to party..addicted to tatts..

Toxictears's page activity

Visits<b>frankmz</b> - the 07/21/2016 at 9:59pm<b>tjg8885</b> - the 07/15/2016 at 3:42am<b>dno79</b> - the 07/02/2016 at 12:18pm<b>chewsef</b> - the 06/18/2016 at 9:02pm<b>luvkink</b> - the 06/18/2016 at 2:50am<b>Zero_TAlent_</b> - the 06/18/2016 at 12:18am<b>pred8885</b> - the 05/24/2016 at 8:55am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 05/12/2016 at 8:41pm<b>HarleyBlues</b> - the 05/03/2016 at 7:53pm<b>duduv2</b> - the 05/02/2016 at 7:32pm<b>thomas5915</b> - the 05/02/2016 at 3:12pm<b>silentj46290</b> - the 04/20/2016 at 7:26am<b>rwal0912</b> - the 04/08/2016 at 8:23am<b>onlytimewilltell</b> - the 03/18/2016 at 11:51pm<b>stuckintime</b> - the 03/15/2016 at 2:25pm<b>MissCobra</b> - the 02/25/2016 at 3:01am<b>samrompain</b> - the 02/18/2016 at 5:46pm<b>Theokholes</b> - the 01/09/2016 at 7:40pm

Fucked!<b>dno79</b> - the 07/02/2016 at 6:19pm<b>luvkink</b> - the 06/18/2016 at 8:51am<b>HarleyBlues</b> - the 05/04/2016 at 1:52am<b>airassault</b> - the 12/21/2015 at 7:50pm<b>NodakN8V</b> - the 08/18/2015 at 9:19pm<b>dk1991</b> - the 07/22/2015 at 4:24am

Toxictears's FML badges


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Toxictears's favorite FMLs

Today, at work, I decided to make things more interesting, so when I called people I used a fake accent. As I was using an Australian accent, the person I was talking to asked me where in Australia I was from. I desperately replied, "Where the kangaroos are..." I'm now jobless. FML

by sincerely depressed. / 08/09/2012 at 5:42pm / United States (California) / Work

Today, in the middle of sex, my boyfriend asked me what he should get his mother for her birthday. FML

by Badkitty14 / 08/09/2012 at 4:16pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, I was at the mall, when a guy started screaming at his buddy for sleeping with his sister. It was pretty hilarious, so when he stormed off, I mockingly yelled, "Pussy!" He then whirled around and beat the absolute hell out of his friend. Now I feel like I'm going to reincarnate as a turd. FML

by feelsterrible / 08/09/2012 at 3:51pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous

Today, some guy asked me if he could borrow my lighter. I said "of course," reached into my handbag, and gave him the lighter. He stared at me for a few seconds until I realised I'd given him a tampax. FML

by mary / 08/09/2012 at 2:10pm / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous

Today, I discovered that the only thing more disgusting than watching a little kid shove their finger up their nose and eat their fresh green mucus is watching your grandmother do the same. FML

by MsConfusedd / 08/09/2012 at 10:51am / United States (New York) / Health

Today, my dog farted so loud in his sleep that he scared himself and woke up barking. This afternoon I achieved the same feat. FML

by Anonymous / 08/09/2012 at 10:26am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I went out with a friend to grab some food and we were served by this really cute and fun waiter. Stepping out of my comfort zone and deciding to do something crazy, I left my phone number on the bill. I got home only to realize that I forgot to pay the bill. FML

by Anonymous / 08/09/2012 at 7:39am / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, as I was cashing a customer out, he stopped me in the middle of the transaction just to tell me that the condoms he was buying are too big for him. FML

by rxcrs3 / 08/09/2012 at 2:44am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I found one of my mom's old diaries that dated back to my infant days. I couldn't help but read a little. I'm now in great concern over how many times my mom wrote that she wanted to dunk me in the toilet or throw me against a wall. FML

by Anonymous / 08/09/2012 at 12:19am / United States (Wisconsin) / Miscellaneous

Today, my wife yelled at me for admitting I take my wedding ring off at work. I explained that I work in a chemistry lab and don't want to damage it. She laughed and said, "Oh please, that chemistry stuff is nonsense anyway." All while reading her horoscope. FML

by Dumbfounded / 08/08/2012 at 7:03pm / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, out of habit, after scratching my balls, I then smelt my hand. It was at that moment I realized most of my gym was staring at me. FML

by FutureMarine3658 / 08/08/2012 at 10:00am / United States (Utah) / Miscellaneous

Today, my insane boss decided I poop too much. Now, every time I go to the bathroom, he follows me in and tries to get me to hurry up by reading passages from 50 Shades of Grey. FML

by blakeintheoffice / 08/08/2012 at 9:53am / United States / Work

Today, I learned that my son goes on online chat rooms and has sexual fantasy role-play. To make matters worse, the characters he uses are from My Little Pony. FML

by FMLMom / 08/08/2012 at 4:02am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I was driving down a dark country road with the windows down. Suddenly, a giant barn owl flew through my side-window and smacked into my head, causing me to drive into a ditch. FML

by Anonymous / 08/08/2012 at 1:59am / United States / Animals

Today, I was bagging my groceries when I accidentally smacked myself in the face with a box of popsicles, giving myself a nose bleed. I found out that the cashier hates the sight of blood when she passed out behind the register. They called security on me. FML