TokiW117

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Offline (the 12/30/2014 at 5:17am)

TokiW117

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 1 March 1992 (24 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 858
  • Number of comments : 7
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 9 posted

About TokiW117 : And in the end, the love you take is equal to the love you make.

TokiW117's page activity

Visits<b>areid2000</b> - the 11/04/2014 at 7:57pm<b>brittanyehanes</b> - the 05/14/2014 at 5:31pm<b>Imjustfloyd</b> - the 05/13/2014 at 12:35am<b>BunchieRules</b> - the 05/12/2014 at 7:51pm<b>feeshcake</b> - the 05/12/2014 at 7:30pm<b>wilburhp</b> - the 05/12/2014 at 5:15pm<b>shorty6823</b> - the 05/12/2014 at 4:21pm<b>tuckit</b> - the 05/12/2014 at 1:44pm<b>TragedyThrillsMe</b> - the 03/25/2014 at 10:24am<b>blueacez</b> - the 03/24/2014 at 3:38pm<b>danielley0205</b> - the 03/21/2014 at 3:57pm<b>chaoss10</b> - the 03/21/2014 at 6:26am<b>Taytochill23</b> - the 03/20/2014 at 9:01pm<b>blakelastovica</b> - the 03/20/2014 at 6:17pm<b>minnersent</b> - the 03/20/2014 at 6:12pm<b>SadMansSandwich</b> - the 09/14/2013 at 4:57pm<b>MGITSWFTC</b> - the 09/14/2013 at 12:04pm<b>DFresh503</b> - the 08/31/2013 at 1:37pm

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TokiW117's favorite FMLs

Today, my daughter was scared to go to the bathroom because she thought there was a person behind the shower curtain. There actually was a person behind the shower curtain. FML

by kids / 05/12/2014 at 1:17am / Kids

Today, after finishing an essay at the library, I fell asleep and had a dream about the essay crawling out through my laptop screen and trying to kill me. I woke by the librarian shaking me and telling me to stop screaming. I was mortified. FML

by systematicpanic / 03/20/2014 at 12:48pm / United Kingdom (Leicester) / Work

Today, my boyfriend of 2 weeks said that he was going to cook me dinner. After waiting for the frozen pizza that he decided to make for me to be completely cooked, he said, "Oh I hate this part", reached into the oven with his bare hands and took out the pizza, all while screaming. He is 24. FML

by Anonymous / 04/11/2013 at 11:42am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I was driving home from a friend's house after a night of partying. Suddenly, I had to poop worse than I ever had to in my entire life. The pain was so bad I had to pull over and pretend to be checking my tires while I let out the entire contents of my bowels onto the road. FML

by poopy pants / 04/07/2013 at 9:47pm / United States (Minnesota) / Health

Today, my boyfriend discovered that if he pulls out during doggy-style and rubs my clit with the tip of his penis, he will be rewarded with a queef. He found it hilarious and tested it out 5 more times. FML

by SoSexy / 10/07/2012 at 6:25am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend thought it would be funny to spank the ferret in bed and spray me while singing the Spiderman theme song. FML

by BabyG2222 / 09/29/2012 at 5:14am / United States (Wisconsin) / Intimacy

Today, my dog farted so loud in his sleep that he scared himself and woke up barking. This afternoon I achieved the same feat. FML

by Anonymous / 08/09/2012 at 10:26am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my husband and I agreed that he would name our first born and I would name our second. He's dead-set on naming our child "Raindropp" no matter whether it's a boy or girl. FML

by trisha / 07/16/2012 at 4:57pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Kids

Today, I was on a date with a great guy, and we were really hitting it off. While we were walking in the park, a woman who smelled like the devil's toenails and looked as if she hadn't bathed in a year passed us. I whispered to my date, "Look at that disgusting woman." It was his mother. FML

by r4inb0wbrit3 / 07/13/2012 at 3:37am / United States (Delaware) / Love

Today, I heard a blood-curdling scream from the bathroom. I discovered my husband, naked and with his pants around his ankles, standing in the bathtub and pointing at a cockroach on the ground. After disposing of the body, I had to stay and comfort him while he wiped his ass. FML

by I_Has_A_Fishy / 07/10/2012 at 3:33pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, while making my daily offering of turd to the porcelain throne, I took out my phone and started playing a game. I suddenly felt a tickling sensation on my leg, and I freaked out as I saw hundreds of ants had emerged from behind the toilet. FML

by Anonymous / 03/04/2012 at 5:20pm / Canada (Quebec) / Miscellaneous

Today, I faced down the Godzilla of all spiders. I smashed the goddamned holy shit out of it. Trying to impress my cute new roommate, I scooped up the remains and showed him. It was his pet tarantula. FML

by Hannah / 03/04/2012 at 3:46pm / United States (Oregon) / Miscellaneous

Today, while I was on the toilet, my cat managed to climb up behind me, slip and then grip itself to my bare ass. In my haste to get away from the cat, I pooped on the toilet without noticing. Until I sat back down. FML

by Anonymous / 02/01/2012 at 1:13am / Canada / Animals

Today, I got to listen while my grandma, who has dementia and therefore a poor memory, explained to me why the old man on TV was a sex god. She forgot everything once she said it. I got to listen to her explanation five times over. FML

by scared for life / 01/29/2012 at 11:23am / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, as I was crossing the slush covered street to catch the bus, I slipped and fell right in the middle of the road. A woman in a car rolled down her window. She didn't ask if I was okay but just laughed and took a picture of me covered in cold, wet slush. FML

by hopeless cluts / 01/29/2012 at 2:36am / Canada (Ontario) / Transportation