TimeTruthHearts

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TimeTruthHearts

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 14396
  • Number of comments : 15
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

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TimeTruthHearts's page activity

Visits<b>urluckyurnotme</b> - the 01/05/2014 at 7:01am<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 11:24pm<b></b> - the 01/10/2011 at 11:39pm<b>kayla_f_babyyy</b> - the 08/20/2009 at 8:19pm<b>sdouaji</b> - the 05/18/2009 at 9:20pm<b>xstaticdelta</b> - the 05/10/2009 at 6:55pm<b>markjbon</b> - the 05/08/2009 at 1:34pm<b>depinaariana</b> - the 05/07/2009 at 10:59pm<b>PsycoJester</b> - the 05/07/2009 at 9:12pm<b>mother_green7</b> - the 05/07/2009 at 8:10pm<b>skinywiteboy805</b> - the 04/23/2009 at 12:02am<b>Dip_Fartson</b> - the 04/21/2009 at 12:27pm

TimeTruthHearts's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

TimeTruthHearts's favorite FMLs

Today, it was my wedding day. I had my butt clenched during the ceremony. I was giving my husband the ring, but dropped it. When I went to retrieve it, I let a huge one ripe. My husband yelled "she likes to eat beans." FML

by 1234 / 07/11/2009 at 12:41pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was going to have sex with my Hispanic boyfriend. I wanted to turn him on, so I asked my friend how to say "fuck me" in Spanish. She claimed it was 'pollo frito'. I then had sex, constantly screaming 'pollo frito' for an hour. I later realized I was screaming "fried chicken." FML

by FML.. / 04/06/2009 at 3:51pm / China (Hebei) / Intimacy

Today, I got hypnotized in front of my entire school. Once I was hypnotized the guy told me that the hottest celebrity in the world was in the audience and then he told me to point out who I saw. I said I saw Mick Jagger. I'm a guy. FML

by Anonymous / 03/20/2009 at 11:10pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, my son said, "Mommy, sometimes my pee-pee goes up like a stick." I replied, "Well, honey, that's normal and okay." I then asked when it happens, to which he said, "Well, sometimes when watching Scooby Doo and Shaggy comes out dressed in lady clothes." FML

by ScoobieDoo / 03/20/2009 at 12:15am / United States (Washington) / Kids

Today, my mom bought me a t-shirt from the store. It has the U.S. Marines logo on it and says "Marines' Girlfriend". I'm a straight 16 year old boy and my mom only reads and speaks Spanish. FML

by Elis / 03/01/2009 at 3:49am / United States (Oregon) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was watching a documentary on The World's Fattest Man. Half way through the show the reported started talking about his girlfriend. The Fattest Man in the world has a girlfriend. I'm 21 an have never had a girlfriend. FML

by Skido / 02/19/2009 at 8:39pm / United States (California) / Love

Today, while waiting for class, I let out a huge fart in front of everyone thinking no one would hear it over the music. I was wearing headphones. FML

by Gob / 01/16/2009 at 9:36am / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous