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TimeDisposalEngi

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TimeDisposalEngi

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 2 February 1991 (23 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1080
  • Number of comments : 74
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About TimeDisposalEngi : As an airplane is about to crash, a female passenger jumps up frantically and announces, “If I’m going to die, I want to die feeling like a woman.”

She removes all her clothing and asks, “Is there someone on this plane who is man enough to make me feel like a woman?”

A man stands up, removes his shirt and says, “Here, iron this!”.

TimeDisposalEngi's page activity

Visits<b>kantalita_claire</b> - the 09/16/2014 at 8:48pm<b>klune</b> - the 09/02/2014 at 1:28pm<b>simplysarcastics</b> - the 08/31/2014 at 6:41pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 08/28/2014 at 11:20pm<b>Hellraiser2083</b> - the 08/18/2014 at 10:56pm<b>yonahd18</b> - the 05/15/2014 at 8:31pm<b>Floby</b> - the 05/15/2014 at 1:09pm<b>Helldemon</b> - the 05/15/2014 at 6:24am<b>FreshDonuts</b> - the 05/14/2014 at 8:09pm<b>Daaaan</b> - the 05/14/2014 at 7:14pm<b>soccerforlife_27</b> - the 05/14/2014 at 2:45pm<b>Alexeon</b> - the 05/14/2014 at 1:30pm<b>sarabrown13</b> - the 05/14/2014 at 1:25pm<b>bmmondi95</b> - the 05/14/2014 at 10:46am<b>Lebeaugars95</b> - the 05/14/2014 at 9:46am<b>wanted_2_want</b> - the 05/14/2014 at 9:36am<b>thatsawkward7</b> - the 05/14/2014 at 9:04am<b>reallynow1910</b> - the 05/14/2014 at 8:00am

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TimeDisposalEngi's favorite FMLs

Today, while teaching juniors about black holes, I said, "Imagine everything being sucked into a black hole." An African-American student shouted, "I'd better start clenching!" Nobody took the lesson seriously after that. FML

#20946225
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43281) - you deserved it (5253)

On 11/05/2013 at 8:22am - work - by regretsteachinghighschool - United States (Minnesota)

Today, at work, I had to explain to my co-manager at work what a period was, after he refused to let an employee go change her tampon. Afterwards, he panicked, saying he thought women made that up so they didn't have to have sex, before trying to send her to the hospital and fainting. We're 24. FML

#20944786
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62039) - you deserved it (4041)

On 11/04/2013 at 12:45am - intimacy - by TheTruthofWomen (woman) - United States

Today, at work, I had to explain to my co-manager at work what a period was, after he refused to let an employee go change her tampon. Afterwards, he panicked, saying he thought women made that up so they didn't have to have sex, before trying to send her to the hospital and fainting. We're 24. FML

#20944786
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62039) - you deserved it (4041)

On 11/04/2013 at 12:45am - intimacy - by TheTruthofWomen (woman) - United States

Today, my 8-year-old came home from school crying. Apparently her teacher told the whole class to write about how they felt when they learned that Santa Claus and the Tooth Fairy weren't real. FML

#20942077
279 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52821) - you deserved it (5237)

On 11/02/2013 at 12:19am - kids - by SantaClaus - United States (California)

Today, I rushed to a dentist's appointment. Once in the chair, I apologized for not having had the time to brush my teeth beforehand. He responded with, "Ah that's alright, I just took a piss and forgot to wash my hands." FML

#20937985
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45756) - you deserved it (12415)

On 10/29/2013 at 2:57pm - health - by Anonymous - Zimbabwe

Today, while I was pet-sitting for my boyfriend's parents, one of their dogs killed one of their kittens. FML

#20901891
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47271) - you deserved it (4908)

On 09/30/2013 at 12:23pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, it's my birthday. I don't mind crappy gifts, but I have to wonder why the hell my boyfriend bought me a home enema kit. FML

#20890231
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38330) - you deserved it (3702)

On 09/21/2013 at 2:10pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I went to the movies with my husband and our 6-year-old son. My husband kept stealing popcorn from the guy next to him, to the point where the guy punched him in the face. The movie was stopped, the police were called, and my son is now inconsolable. FML

#20881087
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45208) - you deserved it (5133)

On 09/14/2013 at 3:32pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Iceland (Gullbringusysla)

Today, my wife appropriated our savings to finance her crazy, midlife crisis idea of designing and marketing Cheez Whiz dildos. FML

#20860571
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36878) - you deserved it (3018)

On 08/30/2013 at 5:05pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I got home from work a little late due to bad traffic. My wife kissed me, then flew into a rage and swore that I had the taste of penis on my lips, accusing me of cheating on her with a guy. Apparently she got this insane "test your man" idea from some Cosmo-type magazine. FML

#20860284
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43656) - you deserved it (2820)

On 08/30/2013 at 12:14pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, my dog decided to poop while inside a revolving door. Before I could do anything, the door swung around and smeared it everywhere. My dog excels at timing. FML

#20770214
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43649) - you deserved it (4152)

On 07/08/2013 at 7:19am - animals - by PerfectTiming - Netherlands (Noord-Brabant)

Today, my husband finally returned from his 18-month deployment. Sexually starved, we wasted no time getting busy. Later as we finally cooled off, I got a message from my Aunt. She was hiding in our closet the whole time to surprise us with cake for his safe return. FML

#20743795
214 comments

I agree, your life sucks (78181) - you deserved it (7093)

On 06/24/2013 at 12:37am - intimacy - by jgtrflynn (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, my husband finally returned from his 18-month deployment. Sexually starved, we wasted no time getting busy. Later as we finally cooled off, I got a message from my Aunt. She was hiding in our closet the whole time to surprise us with cake for his safe return. FML

#20743795
214 comments

I agree, your life sucks (78181) - you deserved it (7093)

On 06/24/2013 at 12:37am - intimacy - by jgtrflynn (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, my boyfriend asked if I could grow out my pubic hair since I usually wax it. He said his mom has a full bush and he always thought it looks better that way. FML

#20719191
273 comments

I agree, your life sucks (83659) - you deserved it (6890)

On 06/11/2013 at 8:00am - intimacy - by notyourmom (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I listened to my elderly bachelor neighbor moan, "Oh, kitty, kitty, kitty! Oh kitty!" for over half-an-hour before he wandered out on his balcony in wet, tight white underwear to water his plant. This is the fifth time this week, and I still don't know what on earth he's doing. FML

#20675279
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39522) - you deserved it (2987)

On 05/20/2013 at 11:56am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States



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