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Timbits93

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Timbits93

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2301
  • Number of comments : 11
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Timbits93's page activity

Visits<b>Impelido86</b> - the 06/06/2014 at 3:01pm<b>Standoff</b> - the 07/29/2013 at 4:00pm<b>Haydn202020</b> - the 06/29/2013 at 8:39pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 02/13/2010 at 4:26pm<b>wantsomejewinu</b> - the 02/07/2010 at 10:54pm

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Timbits93's favorite FMLs

Today, I got pulled over for a traffic violation. Thinking I could get away with it, I spoke with a French accent. The officer then asked me a question in perfect French. I got a ticket. FML

#14705471
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6764) - you deserved it (49177)

On 01/25/2011 at 1:13am - misc - by nmaidkieavg -

Today, I found out that my wife was having sex with my friend. It turned out that my genius cat realized it wasn't me there and attacked his balls, severely cutting them. I now have to kill my cat and pay for his medical bills to sew his balls back. FML

#14512160
458 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68516) - you deserved it (3648)

On 01/08/2011 at 8:11pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, as the clock struck twelve for the new year, I was in the bathroom having a nosebleed. FML

#14423827
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23302) - you deserved it (3632)

On 01/01/2011 at 10:37am - health - by cauteriseme (woman) - United Kingdom (Warwickshire)

Today, a woman slipped on the ice in front of me. Instinctively, I caught her before she fell. Instead of thanking me, she whirled around and asked me if my *expletive* mother had taught me to grope women inappropriately. FML

#14070923
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27721) - you deserved it (2297)

On 12/03/2010 at 11:29am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, a car hit me. I didn't get hurt, but someone called 911. The old woman who had hit me got out of the car with no problem to look at me, and gets back into the car. When the police arrive, she pulls out crutches and said I made strange faces and made her hit me. I got blamed. FML

#13972453
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32168) - you deserved it (2170)

On 11/25/2010 at 8:28am - misc - by Tom -

Today, my parents asked me if I had a nice time with my girlfriend at the amusement park I took her to yesterday. She was pretty freaked out by some of the rides so without thinking I said, "Yeah, but she sure is a screamer." My parents then exchange a look and say, "Oh trust us, we know." FML

#13836763
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12649) - you deserved it (27466)

On 11/14/2010 at 2:36am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Reserved

Today, I learned I was adopted and that my parents had died in a car accident when I was really young. My girlfriend was sitting next to me when I got the news, and several hours later broke up with me in a text stating, "I don't want to be with someone who doesn't have real parents." FML

#13506620
303 comments

I agree, your life sucks (75146) - you deserved it (3321)

On 10/19/2010 at 12:30am - misc - by losingit (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was woken by the news that my car had been found, but was completely destroyed due to a fire. I didn't even know my car was missing. FML

#13498140
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26593) - you deserved it (2513)

On 10/18/2010 at 11:52am - misc - by Username - Sent from mobile version

Today, I went to see Jackass 3 in 3D. While the previews were playing, some guy sitting next to me leaned over and began telling me what happens in every scene, completely ruining the movie for me. He tried to get my number afterwards. FML

#13470194
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29260) - you deserved it (3878)

On 10/16/2010 at 9:14am - misc - by dcait_1196 - Sent from mobile version

Today, I went to see Jackass 3 in 3D. While the previews were playing, some guy sitting next to me leaned over and began telling me what happens in every scene, completely ruining the movie for me. He tried to get my number afterwards. FML

#13470194
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29260) - you deserved it (3878)

On 10/16/2010 at 9:14am - misc - by dcait_1196 - Sent from mobile version

Today, I learned that making an illegal U-turn right after you see a cop doing one will not stop said cop from ticketing you. FML

Today, my sister and I got into an argument at a tennis court which ended up with her trying to run me over in the parking lot. I stepped to the side and hit her door, denting it. My parents expect me to pay for the damage caused by my sister trying to kill me. FML

#13357466
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27878) - you deserved it (3065)

On 10/07/2010 at 7:37pm - misc - by toyotasmash - United States

Today, while working the cash register at my job, a little kid was running around with products while his mom was checking out. She told him she was going to give me his PSP if he didn't stop. He responded by throwing a bag of coffee beans at my face. I didn't even get to keep his PSP. FML

#13347486
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26486) - you deserved it (3712)

On 10/06/2010 at 9:15pm - kids - by BagelShmear - United States (Florida)

Today, I was giving my boyfriend road head. He closed his eyes when he came, and crashed into a pole. I have whiplash, and a very very angry father. FML

#13321339
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9323) - you deserved it (54118)

On 10/04/2010 at 8:47pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was on an airplane, riding in first class for the first time in my life. The man next to me turned to me just before takeoff, stared at my chest, and said that he hoped there would be severe turbulence. FML

#13198134
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33005) - you deserved it (3827)

On 09/25/2010 at 5:49pm - misc - by huj - United States (Texas)



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