TheSwampFaerie

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TheSwampFaerie

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 29 September 1993 (22 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 971
  • Number of comments : 4
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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TheSwampFaerie's page activity

Visits<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 10:31pm<b>perdix</b> - the 09/28/2010 at 8:42am

TheSwampFaerie's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

TheSwampFaerie's favorite FMLs

Today, I was having the most wonderful bath. The water was steaming, the bubbles were bubbly, and I was reading a really good book. I put my book down to yawn and looked to my right. My gaze was met by the lovely face of my brother's pet tarantula. FML

by mzgabbster / 10/24/2010 at 8:21am / United States (Utah) / Animals

Today, a woman got out of a car to scream at me as I was walking with the kids I babysit, demanding to know where I was taking her children. Apparently the woman who pays me is also a babysitter, who I have been "covering" for on her party nights. The mother doesn't believe I didn't know this. FML

by Anonymous / 10/23/2010 at 8:52pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Kids

Today, after a heated debate with my friend on whether blondes are naturally stupid, I convinced her that I'm actually quite intelligent, and poured myself a glass of juice in victory. After finishing the glass, instead of returning the bottle back to the refrigerator, I put it in the cupboard. FML

by Blondie / 10/22/2010 at 4:37pm / United States (Maryland) / Love

Today, I teach English in Taiwan. I got two new students, brothers named Harry and Potter. People, they're children, not pets. FML

by Anonymous / 10/21/2010 at 9:03pm / Miscellaneous

Today, I was on Skype with a guy I really like, in the living room. My dad saw that I was on video chat, got undressed, right down to his bright green y-fronts, and then started dancing behind me. My crush saw it all. FML

by maddiee. / 10/21/2010 at 11:20am / Indonesia (Jakarta Raya) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was walking down my very steep basement stairs when I fell and rolled all the way down but luckily I didn't hurt anything. While walking back up around the very last stair, my cat jumped out on me, causing me to roll all the way back down. FML

by catattack78 / 10/21/2010 at 10:48am / United States (Maryland) / Health

Today, my doctor confirmed that the extreme pain I've been experiencing is due to a kidney stone. My friend decided this was the time to tell me that passing a kidney stone is the male equivalent of child birth. Hello even more pain. FML

by bjevilcat2 / 10/18/2010 at 2:02pm / United States / Health

Today, my car door and window were broken when a thief broke into my car. Cost to repair the damage? $600. Increase to my car insurance premiums? $40 a month. What'd they steal from my car? A $0.98 chocolate chip cookie. FML

by Anonymous / 10/16/2010 at 5:54pm / United States (Florida) / Transportation

Today, I found out the man I'm getting a ride from drives a windowless van and is "excited to see me". My friends had encouraged me to sign up for the cheap-ride program because it was less expensive than taking a train. If I never come back, look for a windowless van somewhere in Europe. FML

by deadinavan / 10/13/2010 at 8:57am / Germany (Bayern) / Transportation

Today, I fainted because of a condition I have. My husband, who was standing right there, failed to catch me because he didn't want to drop his yogurt. FML

by anon / 10/12/2010 at 5:52pm / United States (California) / Health

Today, I picked up my four year old son from daycare. As I was putting him in his car seat, I asked him if he had fun. He yelled, "Shut it, bitch!" FML

by blah blah daddy / 10/02/2010 at 7:08pm / United States (California) / Kids

Today, I took a girl I like to the movies. Everything went great until I went in to kiss her. She didn't object, but my mother, who apparently followed me to the theater and was now pulling me away by my shirt while saying, "We're leaving!" certainly did. FML

by Jake / 09/28/2010 at 1:35pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Love

Today, there were a few loud and annoying kids running around my store. My coworker and I started talking and I jokingly stated "Yeah, kids ruin everything." But before I could get out "God knows I'm not ready to be a dad," my phone rang. It was my one night stand. I'm going to be a daddy. FML

by Anonymous / 09/24/2010 at 7:25am / United States (Ohio) / Kids

Today, I dropped my iPod Touch underneath concrete slab steps, and it's physically impossible to get it back. If you stand above where the iPod is, you can still hear it play music. It's like it's mocking me. FML

by Anonymous / 09/20/2010 at 7:38pm / Canada (Ontario) / Geek

Today, I was singing and playing keyboards with my band on stage at a club. A drunken chick from the crowd tried to climb up onto the stage in her heels, fell, and grabbed the back of my mic stand to catch herself. And busted me in the mouth with my own microphone. Then she requested a song. FML

by northernlass / 09/20/2010 at 12:47am / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous