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ThePhantomGamer

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ThePhantomGamer
  • Town/Country : Cooper City, United States
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 9 August 1984 (29 years)
  • Number of visits : 2674
  • Number of comments : 32
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

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Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

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ThePhantomGamer's favorite FMLs

Today, my dad was in town for 1 day. We only had about 3 hours to do something so we left right away. Right as we were about to leave my dads slutty girlfriend came by for a "surprise visit". My dad told me he would be right back. They had sex for 2 hours and 45 minutes. we talked for 15 minutes. FML

#1933237
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (74048) - you deserved it (3219)

On 05/14/2009 at 3:43pm - intimacy - by MacBook (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I got a call from the Hollister manager yelling at me for not showing up for work that night. I was never informed I got the job. I missed my first day of work. FML

#1214347
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59854) - you deserved it (4950)

On 04/22/2009 at 1:22am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Alabama)

Today, my girlfriend left her phone on a bus. With no way to pick it up, I drove 40 miles through Friday night Boston traffic to get it from the bus company office. It took me four hours. Bored in traffic, I discovered the texts from her other boyfriend. FML

#1064641
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (76889) - you deserved it (4229)

On 04/17/2009 at 7:15pm - misc - by Safe - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I saw a spider in my bathtub, so instead of killing it, i decided to bring my dog inside the bathroom to kill the spider for me. Turns out that the spider was a black widow, and my dog was bit. The dog killed the spider. The spider killed my dog. FML

#674037
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68762) - you deserved it (148480)

On 03/29/2009 at 1:04am - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I decided to cheat on my math test by writing a couple of equations on my hand. Totally satisfied, I handed my test in feeling like I had aced it. As I was heading toward the door, I happily waved goodbye to my teacher. She saw everything. FML

#637114
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12481) - you deserved it (153060)

On 03/27/2009 at 12:39am - misc - by rutho (man) - United States (California)

Today, I signed up for an online dating site. After completing their personality quiz, I set the distance to a 60 mile radius of where I live. Then to the country. Then to the whole world. I got no matches for any of the settings. FML

#555846
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (105024) - you deserved it (14060)

On 03/23/2009 at 4:38pm - love - by Rajin (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I went for a jog in my neighborhood. While I was running I passed my girlfriend's parents who were out for a walk. Trying to make a good impression, I stopped to talk. When I got home I realized I was wearing a shirt that friends gave me as a joke. It said "Blow me, bitch. It's my b-day." FML

#343744
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16461) - you deserved it (70019)

On 03/15/2009 at 3:32pm - intimacy - by Noname (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was dumped by my boyfriend of almost a year because he was no longer sexually attracted to me because I'm "overweight," even though I only weigh 130 pounds. Afterward I went to my friend's house and sat in an old wooden chair. It broke into pieces as soon as I sat down. FML

#214714
252 comments

I agree, your life sucks (78681) - you deserved it (8212)

On 03/05/2009 at 1:38am - misc - by saltinawound (woman) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I was walking through Borders with my girlfriend, when we pass a girl scout cookies stand. I see a box of Samoas, my favorite, point at them, and shout, 'YEAH'. My girlfriend looks shocked. Behind the box of cookies was a five year old scout bending over, with her bottom pointed at me. FML

#170218
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52072) - you deserved it (13675)

On 03/01/2009 at 12:55pm - misc - by Scottrick (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. I cried and told him that I loved him. He gave me a quarter and told me to call someone who cared. I threw the quarter in his face and ran. I waited for the bus, but when I got on, I realized I was 25 cents short of the fare. I walked home in the rain. FML

#97632
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (239514) - you deserved it (43354)

On 02/21/2009 at 5:11pm - love - by GD (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I came to school late because I had to drop off my daughter at school. When I got on campus, the security told me I was late but I said, "Oh no, I work here." and he said, "Oh like I haven't heard that one before." And he took me to detention. My boss, the Principal, had to bail me out. FML

#94927
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42103) - you deserved it (2589)

On 02/21/2009 at 6:22am - work - by Lily (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I found some porn videos in my parents room. I put them in and began to toss off, but as the camera moved up I realized it was my mom and my step-dad. FML

#11602
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10045) - you deserved it (42452)

On 02/06/2009 at 1:25pm - misc - by Noname (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, while my 4 year old nephew was hugging me, he stepped back and declared, "Auntie, my Pee-do is hard, but it will go away." FML

#11033
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26685) - you deserved it (2437)

On 02/05/2009 at 8:30pm - misc - by Fag_Hag (woman) - United States (Maryland)



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