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TheGothGamerGirl's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 11/16/2011 at 9:24pm / United States (Texas) / Transportation
Today, I got home late to find my dad outside mowing the lawn in the dark. I told him the neighbors were going to think he lost his marbles for mowing it at that time. He then informed me he wasn't mowing it, he was vacuuming it. FML
by Anonymous / 11/13/2011 at 3:40am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
by KayleeXLoVe21 / 11/03/2011 at 7:48pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy
Today, I went over to my friend's house. We were teasing each other, when she stood up and began to jokingly walk away. Trying to be cute, I tried to pull her onto my knee. I miscalculated and she ended up sitting right on my boner. FML
by Anonymous / 10/28/2011 at 7:39pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Intimacy
Today, I was napping. I woke up to my pillow making some sounds. Thinking it was my head shifting my pillow, I went back to sleep. Later on I woke up to the sounds again, and a mouse staring at my face. FML
by pinkjade / 10/25/2011 at 3:17am / Canada (British Columbia) / Animals
Today, working as an EMT on an ambulance, we had a patient who refused to accept that he had a massive GI bleed, despite the fact that bloody stool was flowing from his anus all over my ambulance. To make things worse, my EMT ride-along student puked all over the patient. FML
by fire1 / 10/25/2011 at 12:30am / United States (California) / Work
Today, a neo-Nazi stopped me and commented on my blue eyes and blonde hair. He went on to explain that I could be "pure", and should follow him and other Aryans in the campaign to eliminate Jews, and other "abominations". Good thing he didn't see the Star of David necklace around my neck. FML
by KaySchrages92 / 10/24/2011 at 9:46pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous
by lonely / 10/24/2011 at 10:55am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 10/24/2011 at 6:07am / United States (Texas) / Love
by Mini-wanker / 10/18/2011 at 1:34pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy
by number2 / 10/17/2011 at 9:14pm / United States / Work
Today, I made a half-hour bike ride to the movie store, only to realize I'd forgotten my money. I made the ride back home, grabbed my money, went back to the store, paid, then made a second ride home. I got home exhausted, and opened the case. They gave me the wrong movie. FML
by CPD / 10/15/2011 at 12:12am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
Today, while at the beach, my little brother's hat blew off. I chased after it before I completely lost sight and realized I was no match for the wind. I get back and he's wearing the hat. I chased a fucking trash bag for a mile thinking it was his hat. FML
by justhereforlaughs / 09/12/2011 at 6:32pm / United States (Oregon) / Miscellaneous
Today, while on student exchange in Germany, I was making myself a cup of coffee. When I rummaged around in the fridge, my room-mates asked me what I was looking for. I said I wanted to put "samen" in my coffee. They laughed. Ah yes, "sahne" means "cream". "Samen" means "sperm". FML
by Hum / 07/02/2011 at 5:50pm / Switzerland (Ticino) / Intimacy
by Cowgirl_Up37 / 07/02/2011 at 4:54pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous