Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

TheFuckerofShit

Offline (the 09/04/2014 at 7:53pm) | Search for a member

TheFuckerofShit

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 28 February 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 4008
  • Number of comments : 70
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 9 posted

About TheFuckerofShit : Well, I'm kind of lazy and clumsy (unless I'm on coffee, lol), and a bit shy at first, then I'm a (good) monster once someone gets to know me. I love Heavy Metal music, more specifically Thrash Metal. Older music is something I enjoy also, such as Classic Rock or the Blues. I tend to be more level headed and sane than most of my friends. I love sitcoms and some older cartoons, too. My hobbies are playing games (Doom, Flight Simulator, BF3, CoD, GTA: SA, old NFSs, etc.), watching my favorite TV shows, eating delicious food, and sleeping.

I barely ever comment on FMLs since my thoughts wouldn't add much to the comments.

TheFuckerofShit's page activity

Visits<b>Toughsky</b> - the 07/06/2014 at 3:59am<b>swick25</b> - the 05/16/2014 at 10:13pm<b>foog19</b> - the 03/05/2014 at 7:05am<b>sleeplessjimmy</b> - the 11/16/2013 at 9:52pm<b>CaptFappingtons</b> - the 11/11/2013 at 4:50pm<b>guitar_shredder</b> - the 10/17/2013 at 6:33pm<b>pootispancakeman</b> - the 09/23/2013 at 11:58pm<b>DeafGirl124</b> - the 08/15/2013 at 3:53pm<b>haylburg</b> - the 08/06/2013 at 6:38pm<b>chadwj</b> - the 07/30/2013 at 9:03pm<b>iheartLA</b> - the 07/13/2013 at 3:01am<b>neeni88</b> - the 07/09/2013 at 8:43am<b>hunteryager</b> - the 04/05/2013 at 7:46pm<b>Naivx00</b> - the 03/08/2013 at 1:51am<b>naners_clark</b> - the 02/14/2013 at 6:54pm<b>FinJage</b> - the 02/14/2013 at 12:20am<b>MikeM27</b> - the 12/31/2012 at 1:36pm<b>Epikouros</b> - the 12/26/2012 at 7:36pm

TheFuckerofShit's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

A new Thumb

You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of TheFuckerofShit's badges

TheFuckerofShit's favorite FMLs

Today, my dad walked into my room, threw some magazines on my bed, and calmly said "You left your porn in the bathroom again." FML

#18624814
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10160) - you deserved it (44495)

On 12/27/2011 at 12:58pm - intimacy - by ;)loganberry(; - United States (Montana)

Today, I walked in on my boyfriend trying to put his penis in a hole in our bedroom wall. FML

#18609988
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31343) - you deserved it (4848)

On 12/25/2011 at 7:07pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Southampton)

Today, my boyfriend started freaking out about how his penis floats in water. Baths with him will never be the same again. FML

#18566485
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25485) - you deserved it (3629)

On 12/20/2011 at 11:32pm - intimacy - by bathtime (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, the cute guy in my class asked if I wanted to come over to his house to "study" on Saturday for our finals. I went to his house expecting a good time. He actually wanted to study. FML

#18534413
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11285) - you deserved it (48435)

On 12/17/2011 at 8:30am - love - by SuperCoolGurl (woman) - Australia

Today, my husband called me to the bedroom to show me something. This "something" was him demonstrating his seemingly well-trained ability to accurately type out a sentence on my phone using nothing but his erect penis. FML

#18531722
290 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30337) - you deserved it (5365)

On 12/16/2011 at 10:46pm - intimacy - by anne (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I saw a quarter in my poop. My friends say I do stupid things when I get drunk. Apparently, eating change is one of them. FML

#18500551
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8508) - you deserved it (32233)

On 12/13/2011 at 1:32am - health - by photomark - United States

Today, I drank a fifth of vodka before I took my political science final. My professor later called me to tell me that I had written "Obama is a beautiful chocolate man" to every essay question. FML

#18465913
0 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11016) - you deserved it (87474)

On 12/09/2011 at 1:11am - misc - by blondie101 - United States

Today, I cleaned my toilet. I had forgotten it was white. FML

#18430180
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6517) - you deserved it (42662)

On 12/04/2011 at 7:40pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I sat on Santa's lap. He got an erection. FML

#18404973
238 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39986) - you deserved it (9437)

On 12/01/2011 at 5:25pm - intimacy - by pops up - United States (Missouri)

Today, I saw Santa. He gave me the finger. FML

#18378519
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24155) - you deserved it (5023)

On 11/28/2011 at 7:44pm - misc - by moopymoplady - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I gave my boyfriend the silent treatment. He put his Facebook status as "When your girlfriend finally shuts up for once". FML

#18287242
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15988) - you deserved it (41391)

On 11/19/2011 at 6:42am - love - by kaybax - South Africa (KwaZulu-Natal)

Today, my son asked me where babies come from. I told him, "From god." He came back with, "Daddy said it was from fucking." FML

#18255063
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35880) - you deserved it (18851)

On 11/15/2011 at 12:20pm - intimacy - by lababy (woman) - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. The lights kept on going on and off. Why? The lights are activated by "clap on, clap off." It killed the mood. FML

#18150434
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33050) - you deserved it (8882)

On 11/03/2011 at 7:48pm - intimacy - by KayleeXLoVe21 - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend admitted that the only reason he remembers my eye color is because it's the same shade of his shit after he's had a salad. FML

#18121591
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32699) - you deserved it (3230)

On 10/31/2011 at 4:06pm - love - by poopcoloredeyes (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my dad walked in on me masturbating. All I could say was, "Uh I had an itch..." FML

#18100630
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16947) - you deserved it (30866)

On 10/29/2011 at 12:43am - intimacy - by me - United States (New Jersey)



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Zach's illustrated FML
  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: