TheComputerGuy96

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Offline (the 05/11/2015 at 1:00am)

TheComputerGuy96

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 28 August 1986 (29 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 6552
  • Number of comments : 208
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 50 posted

About TheComputerGuy96 : In the desert you can remember your name.

TheComputerGuy96's page activity

Visits<b>zak111</b> - the 02/22/2016 at 3:00pm<b>_delusions_</b> - the 12/27/2015 at 8:44pm<b>jsb1426</b> - the 12/14/2015 at 4:22am<b>melons</b> - the 08/31/2015 at 5:25am<b>SandSammiches</b> - the 04/08/2015 at 12:55pm<b>CDT97</b> - the 01/15/2015 at 3:15am<b>Marine6297</b> - the 10/29/2014 at 3:08pm<b>lucifer_xox</b> - the 10/03/2014 at 9:22am<b>rocker_chick23</b> - the 09/21/2014 at 1:24am<b>Dr_Strange</b> - the 08/25/2014 at 9:57pm<b>Dany93</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 2:34am<b>SuperWhoMarvLock</b> - the 06/24/2014 at 8:30pm<b>freedomna</b> - the 03/20/2014 at 9:24pm<b>alexmac222</b> - the 12/29/2013 at 4:36am<b>andrea_poche</b> - the 11/25/2013 at 1:22pm<b>Rainhawk94</b> - the 10/21/2013 at 6:30pm<b>Ohthatsnasty</b> - the 09/22/2013 at 11:46pm<b>supertacowaffle</b> - the 08/15/2013 at 3:10pm

TheComputerGuy96's FML badges

Happy Ending

Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”

Back from a party

An FML submitted on a Saturday morning between 5 and 6am can't be a good FML.

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

See all of TheComputerGuy96's badges

TheComputerGuy96's favorite FMLs

Today, I was volunteering at the hospital. This lady was calling the Nurses' Station, and I had to go see what she wanted. When I asked her what she needed, she mumbled something. As I leaned in closer to hear what she was saying, she threw up all over my face. Apparently, she was nauseous. FML

by Anonymous / 04/12/2009 at 3:41pm / United States (New Jersey) / Work

Today, my mom asked me to look through old VHS tapes to throw away, I found one that said "Ashley's kindergarten Play-'95", I put the tape in, it begins to play, only to see "Days of our lives", "Melrose Place", and "ER". My childhood memories are ranked lower than tv shows. FML

by 4gottenmemories / 04/07/2009 at 10:53pm / United States (Arizona) / Love

Today, I ran over a squirrel. I saw it twitching, so I backed over it to end its suffering. It wasn't a squirrel; it was a kitten. The children it belonged to watched as I ran over their kitten. Twice. FML

by Anonymous / 04/07/2009 at 8:11pm / United States (Virginia) / Animals

Today, I was going to have sex with my Hispanic boyfriend. I wanted to turn him on, so I asked my friend how to say "fuck me" in Spanish. She claimed it was 'pollo frito'. I then had sex, constantly screaming 'pollo frito' for an hour. I later realized I was screaming "fried chicken." FML

by FML.. / 04/06/2009 at 3:51pm / China (Hebei) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend of 3 months and I were in the middle of a heavy make-out session when his cell rang. Normally, he'd ignore it. This time however he pushed me off of him and said "Shit! It's probably my girlfriend!" I thought I was his girlfriend. FML

by Anonymous / 04/05/2009 at 5:43am / Canada (British Columbia) / Love

Today, I set my AIM status to be the currently-playing file on my iTunes. I've downloaded a lot of porn to my iTunes, and I wanted to watch some. My status changed to "Girl in Latex gets fucked in the ass." FML

by ohshittttttt / 04/04/2009 at 12:15pm / United States (New York) / Geek

Today, I logged onto my computer to access a video from my porn stash. However, the folder was empty except for my favourite file. Thinking that a virus deleted everything, I was thankful my favourite file remained. When I opened it, I saw a video of my parents telling me not to masturbate. FML

by Anonymous / 04/04/2009 at 10:44am / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, my cell phone broke. It wouldn't even turn on. I went online to access my account so that I could order a new phone. I couldn't remember my password. The phone company had an option of "forgot my password". Upon clicking I get a message saying "Your password will be sent to your phone". FML

by nhanley1 / 04/02/2009 at 1:07pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Geek

Today, I got my long hair cut in a short pixie cut. When my five year old daughter saw me she laughed and proclaimed 'You look just like a man!'. That afternoon I got a concerned call from the school. My daughter has told everyone 'mummy has gone away, I now have two daddies!' FML

by Anonymous / 04/02/2009 at 12:14pm / United Kingdom (Edinburgh) / Kids

Today, my friend was saying how her "nano" died. I quickly responded by saying, "So? Recharge it." Turns out she didn't say "nano"; she'd said "nana." FML

by Anonymous / 04/02/2009 at 12:36am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to log in to my computer on a projector in front of business associates at my dad's architecture firm. I typed in my username and apparently didn't hit the tab key hard enough, so I typed my password in the username box. The entire firm now knows my password is "tits123". FML

by Anonymous / 03/27/2009 at 12:46pm / United States (North Carolina) / Work

Today, I realized my friends and I should be more careful what we say around my younger brother. I never thought he was paying attention until today. My stepmom told him it was time to go to bed. He responded, "I think it's time for you to suck one." My brother is 4. FML

by Alex / 03/26/2009 at 12:42am / United States (Georgia) / Kids

Today, I got my laptop back after sending it to Dell to repair water damage after a night of partying. Dell returned my computer unrepaired, saying it was unfixable. When I called to ask why they couldn't fix it, they told me it was a biohazard. Someone got drunk and pissed on my laptop. FML

by Anonymous / 03/22/2009 at 12:39pm / United States (New York) / Geek

Today, my son said, "Mommy, sometimes my pee-pee goes up like a stick." I replied, "Well, honey, that's normal and okay." I then asked when it happens, to which he said, "Well, sometimes when watching Scooby Doo and Shaggy comes out dressed in lady clothes." FML

by ScoobieDoo / 03/20/2009 at 12:15am / United States (Washington) / Kids

Today, I received an e-mail from the girls at work. It was an invite to lunch but it said, "Lunch today at Camber's, PLEASE don't tell Francoise, I don't think any of us can take any more of her!" I'm Francoise. FML

by Francoise3 / 03/18/2009 at 9:02am / United Kingdom (London) / Work