TheComputerGuy96

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Offline (the 05/11/2015 at 1:00am)

TheComputerGuy96

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 28 August 1986 (30 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 6715
  • Number of comments : 208
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 50 posted

About TheComputerGuy96 : In the desert you can remember your name.

TheComputerGuy96's page activity

Visits<b>zak111</b> - the 02/22/2016 at 3:00pm<b>_delusions_</b> - the 12/27/2015 at 8:44pm<b>jsb1426</b> - the 12/14/2015 at 4:22am<b>melons</b> - the 08/31/2015 at 5:25am<b>SandSammiches</b> - the 04/08/2015 at 12:55pm<b>CDT97</b> - the 01/15/2015 at 3:15am<b>Marine6297</b> - the 10/29/2014 at 3:08pm<b>lucifer_xox</b> - the 10/03/2014 at 9:22am<b>rocker_chick23</b> - the 09/21/2014 at 1:24am<b>Dr_Strange</b> - the 08/25/2014 at 9:57pm<b>Dany93</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 2:34am<b>SuperWhoMarvLock</b> - the 06/24/2014 at 8:30pm<b>freedomna</b> - the 03/20/2014 at 9:24pm<b>alexmac222</b> - the 12/29/2013 at 4:36am<b>andrea_poche</b> - the 11/25/2013 at 1:22pm<b>Rainhawk94</b> - the 10/21/2013 at 6:30pm<b>Ohthatsnasty</b> - the 09/22/2013 at 11:46pm<b>supertacowaffle</b> - the 08/15/2013 at 3:10pm

TheComputerGuy96's FML badges

Happy Ending

Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”

Back from a party

An FML submitted on a Saturday morning between 5 and 6am can't be a good FML.

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

See all of TheComputerGuy96's badges

TheComputerGuy96's favorite FMLs

Today, I finally worked up the nerve to text the girl I've had a crush on to ask her on a date. I got back the reply, "Error message 3265: Number No Longer In Swrvice." Not only can she not spell, when I looked it up, "error 3265" doesn't even exist. FML

by ZSL / 08/17/2009 at 5:41pm / United States (New York) / Love

Today, I was home alone and I started to sing Halo by Beyonce. I was starting to get into it and began singing with more passion until the phone rang. It was my neighbor begging me to please shut the hell up. FML

by Ricky / 08/16/2009 at 9:00pm / United States (Arkansas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was desperate to teach my 2-year old to use her potty. I had to pee, and thought maybe she would learn by watching me use it. Everything was going well, until I realized that I had a long pee. So long that it overfilled her potty all over. FML

by Overflow / 08/16/2009 at 5:05pm / United States (California) / Kids

Today, I was on the phone bragging to a friend about losing my virginity last night. When I went downstairs, my 6 year old sister was digging through my purse. She explained that she had overheard my conversation and wanted to help me find my virginity. My mom was in the kitchen with us. FML

by bubbalicious / 08/13/2009 at 4:57pm / Canada (Ontario) / Kids

Today, my cousin came over. I left my iPod on shuffle in the room we were in as I left to go to the bathroom. When I came back she was jamming out to "My Dick" by Mickey Avalon. She won't stop singing it and her mom is coming over to pick her up in an hour. She's 4. FML

by SomeDJ / 08/11/2009 at 11:34pm / United States (Arizona) / Kids

Today, I had a horrible breakup with my girlfriend of two years. Depressed, I changed my Facebook status to, "Hate me today, hate me tomorrow, hate me for all the things I didn't do for you." My ex commented, "Give me an orgasm?" Five of my friends, including my mom, liked this. FML

by JazzSpazz / 08/11/2009 at 2:40am / United States (California) / Love

Today, I picked up my daughter from the day care but before we left, the babysitter needed to have a talk with me. To fill you in, I got a brand new prius yesterday. Apparently my daughter told eveyone that her mommy got a new penis. FML

by Rae / 07/30/2009 at 9:56am / United States / Kids

Today, I discovered my 18 year old son has been peeing on the carpet when he is too lazy to get out of bed in the morning and blaming it on the cat. FML

by tony / 07/24/2009 at 3:04am / United States (California) / Kids

Today, I had an important powerpoint presentation for ALL the big execs at work. It seems that during my lunch break, my boyfriend IMed me on my mac saying "Feeling so horny right now, come home for a quicky like last week?" I didn't see it until the presentation. So did the executives. FML

by Anonymous / 07/20/2009 at 3:07am / United States (New Jersey) / Work

Today, my nine year old son went around telling everyone that me and my husband had a "foursome" last month. It turns out that some douchebag counselor at the camp he goes to thought it would be funny to tell him that a foursome was a divorce. All of his friend's parents think we're kinky freaks. FML

by campmom / 07/08/2009 at 1:02am / Kids

Today, I sent out my monthly curriculum list to the parents of the kids in my math class so they can see what their children will be learning. I usually end my e-mails with the phrase 'math is power'. Now, 154 parents got an e-mail saying 'meth is power'. FML

by shit... / 07/05/2009 at 2:16pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to my 7 year old son's school for a conference with his teacher. When I got there, the teacher said "she adored me for who and what I am". I was puzzled. Turns out my son told his class that I am a "lesbian American." Wrong. I'm Lebanese-American. FML

by lebanesewoman / 06/30/2009 at 12:17pm / Hong Kong / Kids

Today, my five year old daughter was watching cartoons on TV. Then a Barbie commercial came on. My daughter sang along with the theme song "Be who you want to be, B-A-R-B-I-E." She then turned to me and said "Mom, I want to be a hooker." FML

by ....... / 06/23/2009 at 1:56pm / United States (Colorado) / Kids

Today, I was down at Disney World. Me and my buddy decided to take our pictures in a photobooth. While in the tiny space, I thought it'd be funny to flash the camera. A women barged in as soon as I did so, screaming "You know there's an outside video feed, right!?" FML

by TheFlash / 06/21/2009 at 9:15pm / United States (Kentucky) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was cleaning out my fiancé's room while he was away so we could move into our new home. Not only did I find a few gay nudie mags, but also some interesting love letters from a nice man named Pablo. Apparently I need to do a lot more than cleaning his room to excite him. Like grow a penis. FML

by vickyxanne / 06/12/2009 at 8:10pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Love