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I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
Today, my boyfriend showed me a YouTube video of him popping a huge blackhead on his forehead. He told me he had been "growing" it for more than 2 years now. I have been caressing and kissing that thing for almost 2 years because I thought it was a beauty mark. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25334) - you deserved it (10754)
On 09/26/2011 at 12:58pm - misc - by Yuuucky (woman) - Canada (Quebec)
Today, I found out that my neighbors took it upon themselves to knock down the fence we shared, and putting up a new one. Thus fencing my pool into their yard. When I asked them why, he replied, "We thought you weren't coming back." I was gone for 4 months tending to my sister with breast cancer. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32909) - you deserved it (1387)
On 09/04/2011 at 2:09am - misc - by Pool-less - United States (Missouri)
Today, while riding in the car with my mother, we got into an argument, at which point she pulled the vehicle over, took the key out of the ignition and used it to turn off the passenger airbag. She then continued driving in silence. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27063) - you deserved it (3321)
On 08/20/2011 at 2:23am - misc - by W1D0 - United States (Illinois)
Today, I woke up to my roommate sniffing my underwear. He said he was checking if they were clean, so he could borrow them later. Which may have been reasonable, if I weren't still sleeping in them. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35046) - you deserved it (2072)
On 08/19/2011 at 2:32am - intimacy - by leftwardfoil (man) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, my girlfriend woke me up at 5 am because she thought someone was watching her from the park. It was a trash can. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20430) - you deserved it (2223)
On 08/18/2011 at 6:02am - misc - by boyfriend123 - United States
Today, a man with a face like a corpse's shoe started talking to me in the long queue at the Post Office. Apparently, his mother invented the banana, and he's first in line for the throne in France if ever Prince Harry dies. And his breath smelled like Satan's ass gas. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21973) - you deserved it (2345)
On 08/17/2011 at 12:48am - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, the police were canvassing my neighbourhood about a recent robbery. When I answered the door, my brother saw badges, panicked, and jumped out our apartment's third-storey window in an attempt to escape. He thought they were after him for using a bong two weeks ago. I'm related to this twit. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25517) - you deserved it (2256)
On 07/25/2011 at 10:10am - misc - by Bec (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I received a $50 iTunes card for my birthday. I immediately sat down at my computer and starting buying all my newest favorites. Then I realized I never redeemed my card so the $50 was all charged to my account. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7939) - you deserved it (33880)
On 07/11/2011 at 3:09pm - money - by brokeaf - United States
Today, it's my birthday. I got a phone call from my high school bully, to remind me that he'll always be able to find me and do whatever he wants to me. He does this every year. I turn 34 today. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36296) - you deserved it (5824)
On 07/07/2011 at 8:19am - misc - by Snurkles (man) - Canada (Alberta)
Today, while working as a cashier at McDonald's, a man came in telling me that he had not received his hamburger. I looked at his receipt and the date said 11/17/09. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26552) - you deserved it (2575)
On 07/04/2011 at 5:42am - work - by crudofalife - United States (Illinois)
Today, I had the most exciting dream of my life. I was dreaming about catching a shiny charmander. I'm 15, and instead of dreaming of girls, I'm dreaming of Pokémon. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24463) - you deserved it (12485)
On 06/29/2011 at 1:47pm - misc - by wispywee - Canada (Ontario)
Today, on the bus, a delusional old man had an extremely long conversation with me, referring to me as "Leslie" and talking about "our childhood together". Not wanting to hurt his feelings I played along. At his stop he got up and grinned at me, saying "I'm kidding. I never knew a Leslie in my life. Nice rack." FML
I agree, your life sucks (32659) - you deserved it (11855)
On 06/26/2011 at 2:12am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Indiana)
Today, I thought it would be hot if I sent my boyfriend kinky message. He didn't reply so I sent a few more. 10 minutes later I got a reply saying, "Honey, this is his mom and you should be a little less desperate." FML
I agree, your life sucks (16605) - you deserved it (38825)
On 06/05/2011 at 3:23am - intimacy - by yup - United States (Washington)
Today, my daughter turned 18. She decided to use this day to tell me everywhere her and her boyfriends have had sex in my house to get revenge for being overprotective. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17492) - you deserved it (44237)
On 06/01/2011 at 2:06pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, my girlfriend of 1 month came over and told me she wanted to talk to me. We sat down on the couch and she told me she was pregnant and that it was mine. I reminded her that we've never slept together. FML
I agree, your life sucks (56337) - you deserved it (3356)
On 05/18/2011 at 3:57am - intimacy - by Jackedup (man) - United States (Florida)
Friday 24 May 2013
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