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TheAtomicBomb

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TheAtomicBomb

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 10 October 1994 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 4396
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

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TheAtomicBomb's page activity

Visits<b>slayer447</b> - the 06/03/2014 at 2:44pm<b>Wizardo</b> - the 02/22/2014 at 11:41am<b>PhotoSmith</b> - the 01/24/2014 at 1:08am<b>MrConcise</b> - the 01/19/2014 at 10:16am<b>icandothecancan</b> - the 01/15/2014 at 4:07am<b>fast60ed</b> - the 08/19/2013 at 3:49am<b>GetKayotic</b> - the 08/16/2013 at 3:29am<b>rawr_ily96</b> - the 04/24/2013 at 12:53am

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TheAtomicBomb's favorite FMLs

Today, my college did a fire drill, and instructions were given by intercom in English and Spanish. The guy beside me mused: "If they say it in English and Mexican, why not say it in Black too?" That guy is my idiot brother, and he was dead serious. Sometimes I think our parents are related. FML

#21257016
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32792) - you deserved it (2684)

On 09/12/2014 at 4:47pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I complimented a guy on his beard. His response? "Thanks. Wanna sit on it?" FML

Today, my younger sister ran into my room, telling me someone was trying to break in. We were home alone, so she went to hide as I took a crowbar and followed the intruder. Just as I was about to swing, he turned around: it was my dad. I had to explain to my sister that burglars don't have keys. FML

#21251987
60 comments

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She just grabbed the ring and said in a raspy voice, "My precious..." FML

#21250558
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40399) - you deserved it (7719)

On 09/02/2014 at 2:58pm - love - by anonymous - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my boyfriend was stroking my stomach and looking into my eyes. It was very romantic, until he grabbed my love handles and said, "Mmmm... bacon..." FML

#21247445
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35309) - you deserved it (4670)

On 08/28/2014 at 9:47pm - love - by ch4nny (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I wore a sexy nurse's outfit for a little roleplay with my boyfriend. After the main event, he said the sex was actually pretty bad and that he should file a medical malpractice lawsuit. Then he laughed at his own joke, got dressed, and went out for drinks. FML

#21245913
80 comments

Today, I was fixing the plumbing at my father-in-law's house. I told him to shut off the water and yell to me when he did. A few minutes later, I heard a yell and removed the pipe. I was met with a face full of water. Turns out he was just very excited when the Rangers beat the Mariners. FML

#21245661
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35183) - you deserved it (3236)

On 08/26/2014 at 7:27am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, while my teacher was demonstrating how to use the ultrasound equipment, we all figured out that I'm pregnant. FML

#21245451
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50366) - you deserved it (9705)

On 08/25/2014 at 10:37pm - health - by whotouchedyou1 - United States (Texas)

Today, at my father's funeral, they were playing the song from Phantom of the Opera where she sings about her lost father. Apparently the song organizer forgot to edit out the part where her romantic interest runs toward her and yells, "That... That THING is not your father!" FML

#21245330
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35498) - you deserved it (2599)

On 08/25/2014 at 7:55pm - misc - by NotThePhantom - United States (California)

Today, I was watching the movie Frozen with my 8 year old daughter. I had seen it before, so I sung along with some of the songs. My daughter put a finger over my lips, said "Shhhhhhhhut the fuck up," then turned back to the TV, giggling. FML

#21245090
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36424) - you deserved it (13669)

On 08/25/2014 at 2:05pm - kids - by JackieD (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was sitting in a boring lecture. Out of bordom, I made a fish-faces with my mouth. Somehow, I made the most realistic fart noise I've ever heard in the process. The whole room stared at me. FML

Today, my sister felt guilty and told me about the changes she secretly made to my résumé months ago. She'd put "doing your mom" and "corporate espionage" as my hobbies, and "Justin Bieber's pussy waxer" as a previous job. No wonder I'm still unemployed. FML

#21244565
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39835) - you deserved it (7245)

On 08/24/2014 at 5:50pm - work - by fuck you, tasha (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my boss slapped me across the face with a raw chicken breast. FML

#21243022
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40339) - you deserved it (4644)

On 08/22/2014 at 8:05am - work - by haileelouxxx (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, some random bloke introduced himself at a bar by asking to fuck me. I got tongue-tied trying to say both "fuck off" and "please go away". I ended up telling him to "Please fuck away." FML

#21242424
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37482) - you deserved it (6736)

On 08/21/2014 at 12:36pm - misc - by royallymessedup -

Today, my girlfriend took our prank war way too far and had a package sent to me at home. Confused, I opened it. It contained a dildo and a bottle of lube. I didn't know my dad was watching over my shoulder until I heard him choke on his coffee and felt it splash over my neck. FML

#21241836
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44235) - you deserved it (7525)

On 08/20/2014 at 5:03pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)



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