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Tektite

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Tektite

1Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 12 February 1988 (26 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2933
  • Number of comments : 162
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 19 posted

About Tektite : HIYA!! I like.. Love the sun and listening to music. I love tattoos and piercings too! I have 3 tattoos and the one on my back is newest (Those shorts make my ass look nice- Yes that is really me). I don't actually like.. Live in McDonald's but I didn't want to like.. Say where I actually lived LOL !

Oh! And, My name is May and I don't usually check messages because I use the FML app.. But I'll start checking just incase! Thanks for visiting *MUAH!!!!!!* *KISSES!!!*

Tektite's page activity

Visits<b>deusetnatura</b> - 14 hours ago<b>garage</b> - the 12/13/2014 at 5:00am<b>vaxc</b> - the 12/02/2014 at 8:59pm<b>lumisokaisi</b> - the 11/30/2014 at 1:31pm<b>Gwen4var</b> - the 11/23/2014 at 10:19am<b>morlogg</b> - the 11/20/2014 at 5:10pm<b>shady914</b> - the 11/14/2014 at 6:09pm<b>noahg45</b> - the 11/14/2014 at 7:40am<b>frozenlover218</b> - the 11/09/2014 at 4:25am<b>andrew1012</b> - the 11/05/2014 at 1:32am<b>Skydiver2001</b> - the 10/15/2014 at 2:41pm<b>OrchestraMaster</b> - the 10/08/2014 at 7:55pm<b>paskievitchjack</b> - the 09/29/2014 at 9:58pm<b>Raleaf</b> - the 09/29/2014 at 9:45pm<b>oreodog</b> - the 09/07/2014 at 9:26pm<b>MrsWinchester</b> - the 09/04/2014 at 9:36pm<b>mimibear10</b> - the 08/21/2014 at 3:56pm<b>Gemma_Mansonite</b> - the 08/18/2014 at 5:15am

Liked!<b>noahg45</b> - the 11/14/2014 at 1:41pm

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Tektite's favorite FMLs

Today, I was at work laminating a large photo. While I was doing this, I had a sudden itch on my nut sack. So I quickly scratched it away. When the customer came to pick up the print, I noticed that one of my pubic hairs had laminated itself on the cheek of the woman in the photograph. FML

#869023
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16084) - you deserved it (90405)

On 04/08/2009 at 10:48am - work - by StevieMe (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, while showering, my 3 year old son comes to the bathroom and puts on all my makeup. Once I got out of the shower, I got a camera I had and took a few adorable shots. Afterward, I sent the images to all my friends and family. Then I realized the reflection on the mirror was me fully naked. FML

#807564
217 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37986) - you deserved it (86027)

On 04/04/2009 at 10:10pm - kids - by heytherexo (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was at the doctor's office and the doctor asked me "have you been having any intimate relations?" and the first thing that I blurted out was, "you mean with other people?" FML

#722108
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20810) - you deserved it (67362)

On 03/31/2009 at 10:46am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was texting two people at once. Trying to respond to my friend's text, I accidentally clicked on this guy's name instead, who I've never met. He just told me about his grandma's funeral he went to that was an open casket. I responded with, "Haha wow you slut, I'm sure you were aroused." FML

Today, I was taking the bus home from work. As I was getting off an old man whistled at me, I told him to go to hell and got off the bus. When the bus drove away the old man stood in the back of the bus, holding up the wallet I left that he was trying to give to me. FML

#551399
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13483) - you deserved it (121663)

On 03/23/2009 at 11:46am - misc - by lily (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was at a sandwich shop and couldn't help but secretly remove a loose hair from a girl standing in front of me. I yanked it and she instantly began screaming and crying. It was in fact a very long mole hair. The thing started bleeding like a gunshot wound. My apologies went unnoticed. FML

#532942
337 comments

Today, I was enjoying my last day of Spring Break in Panama City. I got up to dance on the stage at the Holiday Inn in front of hundreds of college kids. I tried to be sexy by turning around and bending over. My friends took pictures and my bloody tampon string was hanging out the whole time. FML

#470055
288 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33485) - you deserved it (88007)

On 03/19/2009 at 5:10pm - intimacy - by LindseyS (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was out on a date with a guy. His hot co-worker came to have a beer with us, and I knew my best friend would think he was gorgeous. I wanted to take a picture of him without knowing, so i tried to hold up my phone and pretend to be texting. The flash went off. FML

#385410
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18428) - you deserved it (113699)

On 03/16/2009 at 4:41pm - misc - by Noname (woman) - United States

Today, I was masturbating into a sock when I felt something on my cock. I quickly ripped the sock off and threw it on the floor... and watched a huge spider come scurrying out. I just inadvertently fucked a spider. FML

#278783
318 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52397) - you deserved it (98264)

On 03/11/2009 at 8:23pm - intimacy - by SpiderMan (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I tried to prove to my dad that he snores by secretly putting a tape recorder under his bed. I soon found out my parents had sex that night. Apparently, my mom likes to talk dirty. FML

#272262
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34022) - you deserved it (90509)

On 03/11/2009 at 2:57pm - intimacy - by Zack (woman) - Israel (Tel Aviv)

Today, I went to the movies with some girlfriends. The guy behind us was making these pervy, heavy breathing noises, so we threw some popcorn at him. When the movie finished, we saw him in a wheelchair - with a breathing tube sticking out of his neck. FML

#210718
308 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28511) - you deserved it (280893)

On 03/04/2009 at 8:13pm - health - by sheyo (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was typing up a love letter on my computer. A sexual love letter. I was in a classroom, I'm the teacher, I'm gay, and my love letter showed up on the tv screen while my 7th grade students were taking a test. It was up on the screen for 15 minutes. FML

#168595
20 comments

I agree, your life sucks (71100) - you deserved it (282571)

On 03/01/2009 at 4:08am - intimacy - by Sad (man) - United States (California)

Today, my teacher confiscated my cell phone for text messaging. He said he would give it back if the next text that I would receive was important. I prayed the guy I've been texting didn't send the dick pic he said he was going to. He did. FML

#160435
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27707) - you deserved it (95969)

On 02/28/2009 at 12:03pm - intimacy - by textfail (woman) - United States (New Jersey)



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