Tektite

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Offline (the 08/19/2016 at 11:53pm)

Tektite

20Fucked!

TektiteTektite
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 12 February 1988 (28 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4745
  • Number of comments : 164
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 19 posted

About Tektite : *Waves*

Tektite's page activity

Visits<b>michaelm1290</b> - 8 hours ago<b>ruudseriesx</b> - the 08/17/2016 at 1:35am<b>tin_cup</b> - the 08/13/2016 at 3:07am<b>Arnoud</b> - the 08/10/2016 at 4:16pm<b>Mons</b> - the 08/04/2016 at 12:52pm<b>stryder9090</b> - the 08/04/2016 at 7:20am<b>Jayroc</b> - the 08/03/2016 at 2:25pm<b>oreowaffie</b> - the 08/03/2016 at 10:01am<b>LPac5295</b> - the 08/03/2016 at 9:45am<b>sdlr32787</b> - the 08/01/2016 at 10:43pm<b>hellobobismyname</b> - the 08/01/2016 at 4:15pm<b>rogerover</b> - the 08/01/2016 at 1:38pm<b>Zero_TAlent_</b> - the 08/01/2016 at 10:03am<b>welder26</b> - the 08/01/2016 at 8:57am<b>jbuckets_404</b> - the 08/01/2016 at 4:28am<b>thatannoyingdude</b> - the 08/01/2016 at 1:35am<b>delichick</b> - the 07/31/2016 at 2:33pm<b>littlebuck84</b> - the 07/30/2016 at 2:54am

Fucked!<b>Arnoud</b> - the 08/04/2016 at 10:10pm<b>tin_cup</b> - the 08/04/2016 at 7:48pm<b>Jayroc</b> - the 08/01/2016 at 5:38pm<b>delichick</b> - the 07/31/2016 at 8:33pm<b>sdlr32787</b> - the 07/29/2016 at 3:38pm<b>newzealand</b> - the 07/29/2016 at 1:57pm<b>arano</b> - the 07/29/2016 at 1:37pm<b>hussien</b> - the 07/29/2016 at 1:00am<b>mrlucky22</b> - the 07/27/2016 at 5:48pm<b>Zero_TAlent_</b> - the 07/25/2016 at 4:31pm<b>Mons</b> - the 07/25/2016 at 10:26am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 07/24/2016 at 3:17am<b>captain_hero89</b> - the 07/22/2016 at 9:54am<b>Toonice45</b> - the 04/07/2016 at 8:29pm<b>FusionPlacebo</b> - the 08/21/2015 at 4:21am<b>kittykat1501</b> - the 06/15/2015 at 2:40am<b>Shazra</b> - the 03/15/2015 at 5:28am<b>_powerslave666</b> - the 02/21/2015 at 7:00pm

Tektite's FML badges

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

See all of Tektite's badges

Tektite's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend was giving me a handjob in the shower. As I was reaching climax, my mom walked by the bathroom door and started talking to me. My girlfriend didn't stop, and in order to distract from the situation at hand, I had to carry on the conversation with my mom. FML

by Anonymous / 03/06/2011 at 1:15pm / Sweden (Vastra Gotaland) / Intimacy

Today, my dad got drunk and asked if I had inherited his "abnormally tiny penis." FML

by nick / 03/05/2011 at 8:42pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Health

Today, I found my mother in tears, so I asked her what was wrong. She told me, "It's your father, he wants a divorce..." I asked if he'd met another woman, and my mom replied "No, not a woman..." FML

by Anonymous / 03/05/2011 at 6:43am / France (Alsace) / Love

Today, as I was about to go in the bathroom, a girl walked out, shaking water off her hands. Some of it landed on my face, and I just wiped it off. Then she said to her friend who was waiting for her, "The sink's broken. Can I use your hand sanitizer?" So what landed on my face? FML

by anon / 03/05/2011 at 5:15am / United States (California) / Health

Today, as I was about to go in the bathroom, a girl walked out, shaking water off her hands. Some of it landed on my face, and I just wiped it off. Then she said to her friend who was waiting for her, "The sink's broken. Can I use your hand sanitizer?" So what landed on my face? FML

by anon / 03/05/2011 at 5:15am / United States (California) / Health

Today, I had to explain to my doctor and parents that I dislocated my shoulder while masturbating. FML

by kinky / 08/04/2010 at 8:24pm / United States (Virginia) / Intimacy

Today, the water in my shower wouldn't drain so I used a snake to unclog it. I pulled almost a full foot of nasty hair and gunk out of the drain. I just moved in, and the previous owner was an elderly woman. I just pulled a foot of old lady pubes out of my drain. FML

by please_no / 03/16/2010 at 10:40am / United States (Minnesota) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was looking at my wedding pictures I had just ordered and I tried to flick something off one of the pictures, but it wouldn't come off. In a panic I quickly looked through all of my pictures and realized that I had a booger sticking out of my nose. No one told me. FML

by boogerbrain / 12/09/2009 at 4:06pm / United States (South Carolina) / Love

Today, I was looking at my wedding pictures I had just ordered and I tried to flick something off one of the pictures, but it wouldn't come off. In a panic I quickly looked through all of my pictures and realized that I had a booger sticking out of my nose. No one told me. FML

by boogerbrain / 12/09/2009 at 4:06pm / United States (South Carolina) / Love

Today, I went on a blind date. We had agreed on meeting in front of a park. Thinking I was there first, I texted her "I'm already there, sitting next to the fat chick." I heard a beep. SHE was the "fat chick." FML

by sarahh38 / 09/16/2009 at 2:23pm / Canada (Quebec) / Love

Today, I was picking my daughter up at day care. She was outside playing kick ball. A red ball rolls over to me, and trying to impress the kids, I kicked it over the slide. I turn around to see three crying six year olds. It was their hamster ball. FML

by Anonymous / 08/05/2009 at 1:10pm / United States (New York) / Kids

Today, I was running on a soccer field and accidentally dropped my gum from my mouth. No one had noticed so I picked it up and started chewing again. It was a different flavor. FML

by FGum / 07/30/2009 at 1:56am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, a man held a door open for me while I fished my umbrella out of my very cluttered bag. As I was opening my umbrella, I turned to thank him for being such a gentleman. Instead, a tampon that had apparently wedged itself into the folds of my umbrella flew into his face. FML

by umbrella / 07/24/2009 at 7:39am / United States (District of Columbia) / Miscellaneous

Today, at work, as a camp counselor, I was discussing how stupid the idea of santa is to a co-worker, and how every parent should tell the truth to their kids. The intercom microphone was on. I single handily told a group of 100 six year olds that santa was not real. FML

by Anonymous / 07/16/2009 at 8:14pm / United States (New York) / Kids

Today, I went through the drive through at Dunkin Donuts and asked for an iced coffee. After no response I start frantically screaming about bad service. After a while, the woman comes out to my car and says, "Please pull up to the speaker." I yelled at a garbage bin for 5 minutes. FML

by Anonymous / 06/19/2009 at 1:26am / United States (Illinois) / Transportation