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Tektite

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Tektite

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 12 February 1988 (26 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2341
  • Number of comments : 162
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 19 posted

About Tektite : HIYA!! I like.. Love the sun and listening to music. I love tattoos and piercings too! I have 3 tattoos and the one on my back is newest (Those shorts make my ass look nice- Yes that is really me). I don't actually like.. Live in McDonald's but I didn't want to like.. Say where I actually lived LOL !

Oh! And, My name is May and I don't usually check messages because I use the FML app.. But I'll start checking just incase! Thanks for visiting *MUAH!!!!!!* *KISSES!!!*

Tektite's page activity

Visits<b>totallytaco</b> - the 07/16/2014 at 9:08am<b>C0LDST33L</b> - the 07/11/2014 at 1:12am<b>gracie123890</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 11:28pm<b>sythe511</b> - the 06/29/2014 at 3:09am<b>Getty95</b> - the 06/28/2014 at 4:01pm<b>powelale0000</b> - the 06/23/2014 at 11:57pm<b>itsdav</b> - the 06/22/2014 at 6:13pm<b>ilikeirony</b> - the 06/17/2014 at 10:30am<b>hi57o</b> - the 06/15/2014 at 6:23pm<b>rainbowsandshit1</b> - the 06/13/2014 at 12:25pm<b>Snicket</b> - the 06/04/2014 at 10:52pm<b>cookycoconut</b> - the 05/31/2014 at 9:31am<b>Jamesps</b> - the 05/27/2014 at 8:13am<b>Lahariim</b> - the 05/19/2014 at 9:58am<b>bellles</b> - the 05/13/2014 at 7:26pm<b>jonnyBgoode</b> - the 05/04/2014 at 3:26pm<b>PAsurvivor</b> - the 05/04/2014 at 12:12pm<b>levodkamartini</b> - the 05/02/2014 at 11:44am

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Tektite's favorite FMLs

Today, I faced down the Godzilla of all spiders. I smashed the goddamned holy shit out of it. Trying to impress my cute new roommate, I scooped up the remains and showed him. It was his pet tarantula. FML

#19214836
245 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21048) - you deserved it (26534)

On 03/04/2012 at 3:46pm - misc - by Hannah (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend why having sex with him was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty Pringles can. FML

#18772275
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13509) - you deserved it (31934)

On 01/11/2012 at 12:42am - intimacy - by bunnyluver4545 - United States (Texas)

Today, I received a letter from the state saying my 14-year-old daughter is now legally recognized as a male. I have no idea what happened. FML

#18766108
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42858) - you deserved it (4394)

On 01/10/2012 at 12:43pm - kids - by Anonymous - India

Today, I was boarding a plane and an elderly woman asked if I could put her carry on into the overhead bin. Eager to help, I energetically lifted her bag up, and smacked her in the face with it. FML

#18722642
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27726) - you deserved it (5573)

On 01/06/2012 at 12:47am - misc - by plantfood - United States

Today, my mom came home from surgery. Upon arriving home, she flashed a paper in my face and said, "Want to see pictures of my colon?" My eyes are still burning. FML

#18703060
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21115) - you deserved it (2685)

On 01/04/2012 at 1:15am - health - by emsbuffalo - United States

Today, as an important meeting with clients was drawing to a close, we all stood up and they bid their farewells. My response was to blurt out, "Hello!" FML

#18701372
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17908) - you deserved it (6822)

On 01/03/2012 at 10:30pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my daughter brought her new boyfriend over for dinner. I realize now why she said we would get along great: we graduated high school together. FML

#18689614
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43568) - you deserved it (3167)

On 01/02/2012 at 8:10pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my boyfriend came over for the first time to meet my family. The night consisted of my sisters hiding in a tent and chasing us around in it, my parents singing songs from 'The Lion King' opera-style and throwing cheese at him. Pretty sure he's freaked out. FML

#18650275
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27102) - you deserved it (3846)

On 12/30/2011 at 1:35am - love - by wellthatsawkward (woman) - United States (Utah)

Today, I caught my mother attempting to write a $1400 cheque. To whom? The proprietor of a "Christian charity fund" with whom she had been having Internet conversations. The proprietor's name, and that on the cheque, was "Herp McDerpington". FML

#18540980
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30845) - you deserved it (2395)

On 12/18/2011 at 12:18am - misc - by scammed - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I found a condom on my bed with a note written by my girlfriend that said, "Since you started acting like a dick, you might as well dress like one." FML

#18345679
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11864) - you deserved it (56173)

On 11/25/2011 at 10:02am - intimacy - by Dickhead - Lebanon

Today, I rubbed my face in my armpit stubble because it felt like my ex-boyfriend's face. FML

#18342381
226 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12903) - you deserved it (45389)

On 11/24/2011 at 10:51pm - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, while I was in the shower, my very drunken mother came home. She then barged into the shower with me, still completely clothed, and gave me the longest, most awkward hug of a lifetime. After she left me still in shock, she came back and did it again. FML

#18342108
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27692) - you deserved it (2380)

On 11/24/2011 at 10:12pm - misc - by hannahlorraine - United States

Today, I met my girlfriend's family. Her mother wants us to stay in separate bedrooms, and I was happy to oblige since I'm staying at their house. But because there isn't an extra room, we have to stay together. Upon entering the house, her mom searched our bags for condoms and birth-control pills. FML

#18341424
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30777) - you deserved it (2825)

On 11/24/2011 at 9:09pm - intimacy - by vistingherfamily (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was walking to the kitchen in the dark. Something caught my eye and I turned to see a man standing in the corner, clear as day. I jumped and closed my eyes for a split second. When I opened them, he was nowhere to be seen. I'm now terrified to live in my own home. FML

#18338481
490 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45209) - you deserved it (4264)

On 11/24/2011 at 3:30pm - misc - by haunted (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I was walking to the kitchen in the dark. Something caught my eye and I turned to see a man standing in the corner, clear as day. I jumped and closed my eyes for a split second. When I opened them, he was nowhere to be seen. I'm now terrified to live in my own home. FML

#18338481
490 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45209) - you deserved it (4264)

On 11/24/2011 at 3:30pm - misc - by haunted (woman) - United Kingdom (London)



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