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How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, at work, my boss asked me why I wasn't adhering to proper dress code. I pointed out that skinny jeans are in the dress code, to which he replied, "Only if you're skinny." FML
I agree, your life sucks (16505) - you deserved it (8429)
On 10/05/2012 at 12:40pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)
Today, while at my job as a hairdresser, I was giving an elderly client a perm and I thought she'd fallen asleep. She'd died. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38800) - you deserved it (1327)
On 10/05/2012 at 1:49am - work - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my boss captured a huge spider and put it in a jar on the desk in our shop. He's named it Fluffy and is threatening to fire me if I harm it. I'm horribly arachnophobic and we share that desk. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13210) - you deserved it (1356)
On 10/04/2012 at 10:02pm - work - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I was babysitting a six year old girl, when I saw a huge spider on the wall. I screamed and told her to stay back. Instead, she walked up to the spider, squished it, and told me to stop being such a baby. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7038) - you deserved it (16897)
On 09/30/2012 at 1:57pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen)
Today, I bought my nephew some giant green Incredible Hulk fists for his birthday. He thanked me by Hulk-smashing me in the nuts. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13977) - you deserved it (4134)
On 09/24/2012 at 10:33am - kids - by smashed (man) - United States
Today, I got a mosquito bite inside my cast. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29951) - you deserved it (1324)
On 09/15/2012 at 7:36am - health - by Anonymous - United States (Delaware)
Today, I attended my 10-year high school reunion. My ex-husband's new wife showed up in the same dress as mine. I guess both the dress and my ex-husband look better on her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19773) - you deserved it (1446)
On 09/03/2012 at 4:17am - love - by ugly (woman) - United States
Today, I was showing my boyfriend some stuff I bought that day: a new thong and a bag of his favorite brand of peanuts. He was more excited about the peanuts. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11828) - you deserved it (2784)
On 09/02/2012 at 9:38am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Maryland)
Today, my dog, who has been specially trained to go for help when I'm having a seizure, went to alert my parents downstairs that I was having an emergency. The "emergency" was me masturbating. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24283) - you deserved it (7312)
On 09/01/2012 at 1:56pm - intimacy - by thewhompingwillow (man) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I discovered that when a cyclist tears down the street, slaps you across the face as he passes, looks back laughing and flips you off, then crashes into a lamppost, he'll still blame you and threaten to sue, even after you rush over to check his injuries. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24509) - you deserved it (1457)
On 08/10/2012 at 8:45pm - health - by dumbasdogshit (man) - Australia (Queensland)
Today, I finished my first two weeks as an ice cream truck driver. Now I can't get that annoying ice cream truck music out of my head. It's even in my dreams. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16393) - you deserved it (2721)
On 08/10/2012 at 9:58am - work - by ice cream dude - United States (Colorado)
Today, I was mugged. Not for a laptop, cell phone or money, but for the cupcake I was eating. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19193) - you deserved it (1509)
Today, my boyfriend and I were in bed making out. He then tried to unhook my bra. After a full minute of trying unsuccessfully, he shouted "Fuck you, bra!" before hiding his face in the pillows. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24726) - you deserved it (3440)
Today, I tripped on the way back from collecting a prize in front of 600 students and their parents. I got more applause than I did when collecting the prize. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12813) - you deserved it (1191)
On 07/01/2012 at 7:03pm - misc - by plzdontclapme -
Today, I was entering a guy's number into my phone, and I couldn't remember his name. Embarrassed, I tried to be sneaky and asked, "Can you spell your name for me, please?" His name is Bob. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6900) - you deserved it (17519) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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