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Talbo2

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Talbo2

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  • Number of visits : 977
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  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Talbo2's favorite FMLs

Today, I convinced my best friend to talk to the guy I like at work to find out if he was interested in me. She came back ten minutes later, and told me he said he'd never be able to date me. Apparently, kissing me "would be like making out with Mother Teresa's corpse." FML

#18084228
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24902) - you deserved it (3253)

On 10/26/2011 at 9:38pm - love - by nekogirl15 (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my son got really high and shaved the dog with my electric shaver. Not only does the dog look really bad, I didn't know my son used drugs. I now have to buy the dog a sweater and get my son some help. FML

#18078195
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30581) - you deserved it (4896)

On 10/26/2011 at 1:43am - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I went shopping with my mom. I went into my department and tried on some clothes. After a few minutes, there is an announcement that a child has gone missing. Staff are searching the store. I see my mom and she hugs me in tears and yells, "I found her!" I'm almost 17. FML

#17986846
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37010) - you deserved it (3120)

On 10/15/2011 at 1:13am - misc - by Ania (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I went on a date with a respectable, successful, polite, and attractive guy. Ten minutes into the conversation, I find out he's a neo-Nazi and earned a swastika tattoo in prison for "something shady." FML

#17949951
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28244) - you deserved it (3088)

On 10/10/2011 at 3:16am - love - by thatgirl - United States (Texas)

Today, while I was waiting in line at McDonalds, I found out I can sneeze, pee, and poop all at the same time. FML

#17934817
281 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46825) - you deserved it (7243)

On 10/08/2011 at 12:00pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I was using the toilet and decided to check out some FMLs. One made me laugh out loud as my room-mate was passing by the bathroom. He now tells everyone my penis is so small it makes even me laugh every time I see it. FML

#17919622
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38736) - you deserved it (9991)

On 10/06/2011 at 12:17pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada

Today, I had a job interview. The only moment I impressed the interviewer was when I talked about drama. He started to talk about a play I hadn't seen, but I decided to agree on everything he was saying. Suddenly he said, "the play doesn't actually exist." I silently left the room. FML

#17912138
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8343) - you deserved it (33093)

On 10/05/2011 at 4:33pm - work - by Lyingg (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I drove to the liquor store completely naked except for my dressing gown, with a carload of idiot stoners who ran in and stole vodka, tequila and whiskey. We drank in a bush. Last week I was a good citizen, and now I'm white trash. I'm not quite sure what happened in between. FML

#17908235
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7363) - you deserved it (57391)

On 10/04/2011 at 11:28pm - misc - by danii - Reserved

Today, I woke up after a few friends came over last night. There are eggs, coins and Oreos glued to the ceiling, 10 broken jars, no food left, and most of the contents of my house are in the garden. And I'm naked and covered in permanent marker drawings of Pokémon. My parents return in an hour. FML

#17899100
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11733) - you deserved it (48082)

On 10/03/2011 at 9:19pm - misc - by danii - Reserved

Today, I tried to have sex with my boyfriend three times, but every time he insisted that he wasn't in the mood. I left to get food and when I came home he was masturbating. FML

#17880810
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39326) - you deserved it (5065)

On 10/01/2011 at 7:30pm - intimacy - by Patricia - United States (Texas)

Today, my friends and I were having a conversation about which mythical creature would be the most unlikely to exist in the real world. They all collectively agreed that it would be a girl who is attracted to me. FML

#17856112
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33017) - you deserved it (4450)

On 09/28/2011 at 3:26pm - love - by Unluckiest Guy of the group (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I found out that my ex-girlfriend, the girl I completely love, is now dating my father. She tried giving me the "I know I'm not your mother..." speech. FML

#17823429
256 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51917) - you deserved it (2605)

On 09/24/2011 at 7:01pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, like every day, I walked into my office and was greeted by the smell of shit wafting through the air. My lactose intolerant, diabetic coworker won't stop eating Whataburger and milkshakes for breakfast, no matter what his body tells him. FML

#17822826
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27443) - you deserved it (2192)

On 09/24/2011 at 5:34pm - work - by lpspann87 - United States (Florida)

Today, at my job serving, I went to clear the plates when the guy said, "Hold on a second." Thinking he wasn't quite finished, I went to put the plate back. He then reached in to his mouth, pulled out a dark brown object and threw it on the plate. It was a rotten tooth. I almost puked. FML

#17749628
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29659) - you deserved it (1737)

On 09/15/2011 at 3:36am - work - by Tancred (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my girlfriend told me that if my penis was on any other body it would be considered small, but on me it's "cute." FML

#17744252
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36909) - you deserved it (3918)

On 09/14/2011 at 2:11pm - intimacy - by wf - United States



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