Search for a member



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 24 September 1991 (25 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1552
  • Number of comments : 29
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About TK1279 : Forever and Always, Amber Michelle :D

TK1279's page activity

Visits<b>ArcticDragon</b> - the 12/11/2015 at 9:59am<b>paskievitchjack</b> - the 11/22/2015 at 2:42pm<b>rocker_chick23</b> - the 02/25/2015 at 5:20pm<b>LiiaaBee</b> - the 10/15/2014 at 2:18am<b>teezy34</b> - the 09/02/2014 at 11:25am<b>Npinzon1994</b> - the 03/06/2014 at 12:04pm<b>levodkamartini</b> - the 02/25/2014 at 10:45am<b>alexmac222</b> - the 12/30/2013 at 10:40pm<b>_abigailtaylor</b> - the 11/05/2013 at 11:05pm<b>ysosad</b> - the 08/22/2013 at 11:00pm<b>elwoods</b> - the 04/06/2011 at 4:44pm<b></b> - the 10/23/2010 at 8:01pm<b>youngbutwise15</b> - the 10/23/2010 at 10:05am

TK1279's FML badges

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

TK1279's favorite FMLs

Today, a grasshopper jumped into my car. As my boyfriend swiped at it, the grasshopper jumped onto my chest and into my shirt. Instead of helping me get it out, my boyfriend leaned back and said, "It got to second base faster than I did." FML

by tickyette / 09/14/2010 at 3:27am / United States / Love

Today, I gave blood. He sneezed while he stuck the needle in my arm. FML

by gorey / 08/18/2010 at 9:26pm / Canada (Alberta) / Health

Today, I was helping my friend create an online dating profile. When she got her search results, her #1 match was a blonde guy only 10 miles from her. His description: genuine, laid back, and ready for fun. He left off something kind of important. He's already married. To me. FML

by betrayed / 07/19/2010 at 1:36pm / United States (Missouri) / Love

Today, after ten minutes of squishing my boobs together for my boyfriend, trying to get him to stare, he glanced at them then blankly said "I've seen better tits on my mom, so baby just stop that" and smiled. FML

by oboy / 03/01/2010 at 12:13am / United States / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend of two years called me, drunk, telling me how much anal sex hurts with some other guy. FML

by VahnSeiro / 02/20/2010 at 1:04am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, my daughter told me she wanted to be a stripper when she grew up, just like daddy's girlfriend. We're still married. FML

by ShayisPay101 / 02/15/2010 at 1:58pm / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, I returned home to my girlfriend after being away for 6 weeks of work. I decided to take a shower and change before having a nice dinner with her. Without looking I grabbed a random pair of jeans from my closet to put on. They were Levis. I don't own or wear any Levis. FML

by safariboo / 02/09/2010 at 10:43am / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, I was making out with this guy I had been seeing, and things start to get pretty steamy. As he paused for a second, I thought he was going to get up and find a condom, but instead he turns to me and says, "I think I'm going to go to the library." I wasn't invited. FML

by Anonymous / 12/29/2009 at 12:02am / United States (Washington) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend told me he likes having sex during my period because it makes him feel like he stabbed a small animal to death. FML

by Michelle / 12/27/2009 at 2:13am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I had two surprises for my boyfriend who was at work. One was a dessert and the other was sexy lingerie. He chose the dessert. Then told me I was an idiot. FML

by boyfriendisatoss / 12/26/2009 at 2:22am / Australia (Victoria) / Intimacy

Today, I rejected my wife for sex. She then started to masturbate next to me. I got an erection. She then rejected me for sex. FML

by paidback / 12/24/2009 at 8:10pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I fainted for the first time in my life. I was in the shower. With my girlfriend. Apparently, my brain and my erection had a battle for who got the most blood, and my erection won. FML

by Silent / 12/03/2009 at 12:50pm / United Kingdom (Hampshire) / Intimacy

Today, I would rather pound to porn than have sex with my wife, because trying to get her in the mood is too much hassle. FML

by Anonymous / 12/02/2009 at 9:37pm / United States (Virginia) / Intimacy

Today, I got an invitation to my "going away lunch" the company is throwing for me. I didn't know I was leaving. FML

by jobless / 11/10/2009 at 2:16pm / United States (District of Columbia) / Work

Today, while walking to work, I accidentally dropped my $400 cell phone on the sidewalk. The screen shattered into a million pieces. A woman passing by looked at the ruined phone and said, "Now that's what you call a dropped call!" She laughed and kept walking. FML

by Cellismasher / 11/04/2009 at 5:37pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous