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SweetGreyChaos's favorite FMLs
Today, I planned a surprise birthday party for my boyfriend. I invited all his friend and made all his favorite food. He was running very late, so I called to ask what was taking so long. His response? He said he was at his house, with the very friends I was standing next to. FML
by Anonymous / 08/01/2009 at 9:29pm / United States (New Jersey) / Love
Today, I learned that the four girls who I assumed were my girlfriends' good friends and whom she was always talking about were actually characters from the television show, "Sex and the City." My girlfriend has fictional friends. FML
by tubedout / 07/23/2009 at 3:16pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Love
Today, I was woken up by a funky smell. My dog had eaten a dead bird and thrown up all over my bed and floor. At 4 o'clock in the morning I had to clean up regurgitated bits of bird, feathers, blood and dog food. The smell still hasn't gone away. FML
by Tom / 06/15/2009 at 6:07am / Israel (Tel Aviv) / Animals
Today, I was at a fancy restaurant. I was drinking some water when I noticed a hot guy eating alone at another table waving at me. I smiled back, but had forgotten to swallow the water so it dribbled out of my mouth all over my shirt. FML
by Droolgirl / 05/25/2009 at 9:25pm / United States (Virginia) / Love
Today, I got into a huge fight with my boyfriend. I called him and started yelling at him over the phone. He told me that if I wanted to end the relationship I should just hang up the phone right then. Before I could say I still love him and don't want to break up, my phone battery died. FML
by noboyfriend / 05/24/2009 at 12:14am / United States (Missouri) / Love
by Anonymous / 05/10/2009 at 2:37pm / United States (Hawaii) / Miscellaneous
Today, I went to see my gynecologist. She was writing my symptoms up in my chart on her computer. After a little while, I noticed that she had a confused look on her face and was reading something instead. When I took a peek at the computer screen, I saw that she was Googling my symptoms. FML
by blehhh / 04/03/2009 at 11:10pm / United States (California) / Health
Today, is my 18th birthday. I call my parents and they tell me they found weed in the guest house and so they called my boarding school to drug test me. It wasn't my weed. They didn't even say "Happy Birthday." FML
by alrightsheryl / 03/28/2009 at 12:40pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous
by Noname / 01/28/2009 at 6:03am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
- Today, I went to get the Apple store, my Mac had been making a grinding noise from the fan. The guy… Today, my girlfriend and I were going to have sex. To set the mood, she suggested we watch a porno… Today, after getting a pat of appreciation from my girlfriend's father for taking it slow, he found…