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Today, I told my family I'm going shopping with my friend "Emma". My sister's been teasing me about this saying, "Emma can't exist! She's not real! You don't have any friends." She's right. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38518) - you deserved it (11222)
On 05/08/2013 at 9:22pm - misc - by 19kwhatever (woman) - United States (Ohio)
Today, I let my dad put my dollar in the slot machine for me because I'm not old enough to gamble. I won $200 but he kept it because he "put the dollar in the slot machine." FML
I agree, your life sucks (43172) - you deserved it (8025)
On 05/08/2013 at 8:07pm - money - by anonymous - United States (Wyoming)
Today, it's my birthday. I worked late, so I was looking forward to spending a quiet evening with my husband. When he suggested we go grocery shopping, I got excited thinking he had organized a surprise party or something. He actually just took me grocery shopping. FML
I agree, your life sucks (43590) - you deserved it (7786)
On 05/07/2013 at 8:48am - love - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)
Today, after spending a week defending my marriage to everyone, I found out my husband has an addiction I never knew about. Hookers. FML
I agree, your life sucks (46344) - you deserved it (4750)
On 05/06/2013 at 11:27pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, my boyfriend forced me to do stretching exercises with him before and after sex as a "safety precaution". FML
I agree, your life sucks (42584) - you deserved it (6734)
On 05/06/2013 at 3:58pm - intimacy - by stretchy - United States (Maryland)
Today, my girlfriend found a letter I'd written to myself for moral support while we were broken up, in which I explained why we would never work out. Apparently I made a convincing argument. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31778) - you deserved it (31036)
On 05/06/2013 at 10:24am - love - by Alone (man) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I went to go see my granddad in the hospital and asked if he needed anything. He replied, "I need you to get out and send that hot nurse in, I may be old but I still got it." FML
I agree, your life sucks (41205) - you deserved it (5347)
On 05/06/2013 at 4:35am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, I woke up to the sound of my newborn screaming. I frantically hopped out of bed and stumbled into the nursery where I was met by the priceless sight of my five-year-old daughter attempting to breastfeed her understandably frustrated little brother. FML
I agree, your life sucks (57637) - you deserved it (4845)
On 05/06/2013 at 2:29am - kids - by SkeetinKeaton (man) - United States
Today, I ran into my ex-girlfriend. Being the mature one, I went up to her and said, "Hey, how's it going?" She maced me and kept walking. FML
I agree, your life sucks (41410) - you deserved it (9190)
Today, my 6-year-old daughter walked into the bathroom where I was grumbling about my weight. Seeing how upset I was, she took my hand and said, "Mom, you're not fat. You just look fat." FML
I agree, your life sucks (42025) - you deserved it (5346)
On 05/05/2013 at 8:56pm - kids - by me - United States (Texas)
Today, my 6-year-old daughter walked into the bathroom where I was grumbling about my weight. Seeing how upset I was, she took my hand and said, "Mom, you're not fat. You just look fat." FML
I agree, your life sucks (42025) - you deserved it (5346)
On 05/05/2013 at 8:56pm - kids - by me - United States (Texas)
Today, my girlfriend and I were at the river. She threw mud on me, so I playfully threw some on her, and we got into a mud fight. Apparently, she took the "fight" seriously, because I'm now single. FML
I agree, your life sucks (46893) - you deserved it (4652)
On 05/05/2013 at 3:35pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Nebraska)
Today, my dad called me a "deadbeat loser" after I came back from my first day of voluntary rehab for my meth problem. He's never had a job in his life and sits on the sofa all day, smoking weed and playing video games, all on my mom's salary. FML
I agree, your life sucks (49161) - you deserved it (6752)
On 05/05/2013 at 11:53am - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I tried to show my boyfriend's mom a picture of my prom dress on my phone. She scrolled to the right to find a picture of her son, naked. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34740) - you deserved it (64135)
On 05/05/2013 at 1:44am - intimacy - by beyondembarrassed - United States
Today, I learned that my mother counts my jeans as two pairs when she counts how many she's putting in for a load of wash. I've gotten that fat. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20570) - you deserved it (31345)
On 05/04/2013 at 8:41pm - misc - by Fatty Fatty Fatso (woman) - United States (New York)
Monday 17 June 2013
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