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You see, sonny boy, moderating FMLs is a bit like running a marathon.
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
YDI master
That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.
Today, my husband came home with a bunch of realistic-looking wigs for women. When I asked them what they were for, he said he wanted to spice up our sex life with them. When I told him I refused to wear a wig, he said in a very serious tone that I wasn't going to be the one wearing them, he was. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32463) - you deserved it (5360)
On 01/02/2013 at 5:34am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, my wife and I had a fight, which I thought we resolved. Later, while painting the kitchen, I told her to change into an old shirt she didn't care about. She made a huge show of putting her wedding gown on, veil and all. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33909) - you deserved it (3972)
On 01/01/2013 at 4:33pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)
Today, I had a proper look at myself in the mirror. I have recently lost 5 lbs. Turns out that it mainly shows on my boob. Not boobs. Boob. Right one only. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28322) - you deserved it (1873)
On 12/29/2012 at 10:23am - health - by Amathiel (woman) - Norway (Sogn og Fjordane)
Today, I realized something: when other people are drunk, they dance around and make out with people. When I'm drunk, I apparently think it's a great idea to chew on electrical cords. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13400) - you deserved it (19470)
On 12/29/2012 at 2:30am - misc - by almostkilledmyself - Canada (Manitoba)
Today, I set up a spy cam in my room to find out which one of my pervy brothers has been using my computer to watch porn. Turns out it was actually my father. I now have a video of him sitting in my chair masturbating, and I can't get it out of my head. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36720) - you deserved it (8089)
On 12/28/2012 at 2:05pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Malaysia (Selangor)
Today, I went shopping. At the counter, the cashier started flirting with me and asked me for my number. He was cute, so I gave it to him. After walking out of the store, I got a text that said, "I didn't want to say it out loud, but your pants are unzipped." FML
I agree, your life sucks (29839) - you deserved it (3590)
On 12/28/2012 at 2:49am - misc - by Ren - United States (Ohio)
Today, my mother-in-law purchased matching Christmas presents for myself and my sister-in-law to open together in front of everyone. Guess who are now the proud owners of matching metal tampon cases. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24730) - you deserved it (1718)
On 12/26/2012 at 3:53am - misc - by Shelle (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I walked in on my sister plucking her nipples. A shame I didn't get a big fuck-off bottle of brain bleach for Christmas. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19447) - you deserved it (5213)
On 12/25/2012 at 8:49pm - intimacy - by FuckMyEyes (man) - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. I felt down, so I laid in bed and told my parents I needed some alone time. A couple of minutes later, one of them started blasting "All by Myself" so loud that I felt the floorboards vibrate. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28710) - you deserved it (3218)
On 12/25/2012 at 12:00am - love - by all by myself - United States (Alaska)
Today, a woman at work was complaining about her weight. She looked pretty thin, so to make her feel better, I said that she looked small. She said "Well, you haven't seen me naked." For some reason, I replied, "Not that you know of." FML
I agree, your life sucks (11355) - you deserved it (24368)
On 12/24/2012 at 1:37am - work - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)
Today, while at the airport waiting for my flight, I sat down next to a mother and her son. As I pulled out a water bottle, she leaned over to her son and said, "Promise me you will never do what the man next to you just did." I have no idea what the hell I did wrong. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30611) - you deserved it (2777)
Today, my drunk girlfriend maxed out my credit card, on an "authentic" Jesus Christ autograph on eBay. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21985) - you deserved it (3549)
On 12/12/2012 at 9:14pm - misc - by maxedoutidiot - United States
Today, my crazy psychopath of a neighbor sent me an email with the subject, "So, about your sex life." I've been sitting here for 20 minutes staring at it because I'm too scared to open it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24338) - you deserved it (2612)
On 12/03/2012 at 7:53pm - intimacy - by schooyou101 - United States (Kansas)
Today, I'm recovering in the emergency room. How did I get here? Intoxicated at a coed party, I saw a hole in the host's shed and thought it funny to christen it a "glory-hole", only to be bitten by what may well have been a black widow spider. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4310) - you deserved it (29121)
On 11/28/2012 at 1:09pm - health - by Widowmaker - United States (Nevada)
Today, my husband quit his job as a university professor and picked up the graveyard shift at a rat farm so he could have more time during the day to play World of Warcraft. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23565) - you deserved it (1979)
On 11/28/2012 at 1:32am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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