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Subakie's favorite FMLs
by Randomspaghetti / 09/15/2016 at 5:11pm / United States (Utah) / Miscellaneous
Today, at work, I needed to fart and thought it would be fast and silent, so I let it rip. I was wrong. Everyone turned around and looked at me as my fart rolled on for a good 10 seconds. The worst part, I screamed, "It wasn't me!" while I was still farting. FML
Today, I went to a store to buy some noodles, but hey were out so I left empty handed. When I left, the store the alarm went off so I was called back in, and they searched my bag. They didn't find any stolen goods. They did find a dead mouse my cat must have left for me, though. FML
by NotAThief / 08/14/2016 at 6:03pm / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous
by dvddtraveller / 04/22/2016 at 5:25pm / United States (California) / Love
by BenFiggy / 04/21/2016 at 9:28am / United States (New Jersey) / Kids
by mel / 03/25/2016 at 9:20am / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was taking the train home from another unsuccessful job interview. As I was sitting there, I felt the urge to yawn, but before I could raise my hand to cover my mouth some guy stuck his finger in it. FML
by tittyboomboom / 03/24/2016 at 9:16am / Australia / Transportation
by NotBeingPaidEnough / 03/03/2016 at 8:17am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Work
by cutiecuppiecakez / 02/29/2016 at 4:04pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, my mum wants me to see a psychologist because I've been acting strange lately. If by "strange" she means "not wanting to die any more", then sure. But thanks, I could've used that psychologist 3 years ago when I asked for one. FML
by Anonymous / 02/26/2016 at 3:22pm / South Africa (Eastern Cape) / Health
by anonymous / 02/25/2016 at 4:55pm / United States / Health
Today, after having my husband ask if I 'had any plans' for the weekend, and him mentioning that he got me something special, he played his PS4 for hours, ignored me, then finally took a break to hand me a tiny box of chocolates. I can't even be mad because he looked so proud. FML
by marriedbutlonely / 02/14/2016 at 9:36pm / United States (Washington) / Love
by BlueSuit / 02/14/2016 at 2:20pm / United States (New York) / Work
by Sgt_Jackrum / 02/05/2016 at 5:27am / United Kingdom (Sandwell) / Intimacy
by Lord_Nick / 02/03/2016 at 10:13pm / Canada (Quebec) / Miscellaneous
- 1Today, I took a test. I got up to turn it in, and accidentally bumped into another student. We both… 2Today, I tried to fire the worst worker I've ever had over the phone because he never shows up for… 3Today, a week after dropping my car off for the third time in a month at the dealership because of…