About StreetcarProphet : Right, even when you don't like it.
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StreetcarProphet's favorite FMLs
by ladylarni / 04/07/2012 at 4:20am / Australia / Love
Today, I was making love to my boyfriend, when he said "I love you, baby." I told him to go deeper, but instead of doing so, he decided to completely kill the mood by stopping and saying it again in a Barry White type voice. FML
by anonymous / 04/01/2012 at 2:38pm / United States / Intimacy
Today, I confided to my dad that my girlfriend had dumped me for another guy. He said "good" and explained that given how overpopulated the planet is, he's actually disappointed that I'm not gay. His advice was: "just wank it off and move on". FML
by sad / 03/30/2012 at 6:21pm / United Kingdom (Cardiff) / Love
by ohno / 03/25/2012 at 9:11am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Intimacy
Today, I was babysitting this 12 year old. We were watching a movie, and he was being an angel just laying with his head in my lap. He fell asleep so I closed my eyes and had a little nap. When I woke up he had taken my shirt off and was feeling up my boobs. FML
by Anonymous / 03/25/2012 at 8:09am / Australia (Victoria) / Intimacy
Today, as I was walking my dog, two cute girls from my school were walking towards me on the sidewalk. I thought it would be appropriate to wave and give a smile. My dog thought it would be appropriate to viciously bark at and mount one of the girls. FML
by PicklesMcRaptor / 03/25/2012 at 7:59am / United States (Florida) / Animals
by SG / 03/24/2012 at 8:14am / United States / Intimacy
by Chey / 03/22/2012 at 6:13pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 03/05/2011 at 6:43am / France (Alsace) / Love
Today, my boyfriend was inside a cell phone store talking to a sales guy while I waited outside. I sent him a text, not realizing that the guy was using his phone to call customer service. A topless photo of me shows up on his phone when I text him. The sales guy looked. Twice. FML
by LLCoolBean / 03/03/2011 at 3:32am / United States (North Carolina) / Intimacy
Today, I got rejected by two different guys. One was my ex-boyfriend who said he wanted to keep our friendship, and the other was a guy I went on a date with who faked a European accent the whole time during our date despite him being born and raised in Texas. FML
by Apparentlycreepy / 03/03/2011 at 2:24am / United States (Texas) / Love
Today, my friend and I taught a very involved healthy nutrition program to underprivileged youths at a local center. We even made them a healthy snack at the end of the program. Within minutes of the program being over, we catch some of our fellow volunteers feeding the kids Oreos. FML
by Pickle / 03/03/2011 at 1:58am / United States (Illinois) / Work
by Worstjob / 03/02/2011 at 7:35pm / United States (Idaho) / Work
- 1Today, my neighbor's 4-year-old daughter came up to me and asked if she could have my dog. When I… 2Today, after working for Uber for a few weeks I realized that my driver rating was dropping. After… 3Today, I received a phone call, angry at me for not calling my dad on Father's Day. When I told her…