Submit your FML story
- - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Online | Search for a member
About SteamyPenguin : I am Steamy of the House Penguin, the First of Her Name, Protector of the Towers of Catnip, Catleesi of the Great Litter Box, Rubber of Bellies and Scratcher of Chins, Flea Banisher, The Unscratched One, Feeder of Three and Mother of Cats.
When you play the Game of the Flower pot, you win, or you wait around until your sister hops off.
You see, sonny boy, moderating FMLs is a bit like running a marathon.
One more and it's business time
You've received 68 likes on your profile. Kinky.
A new Thumb
You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.
Today, I complimented a player in a game who protected my ass the whole match. As a joke, I told them to marry me. Turned out the person was a horny 40-something lesbian stalker who spent the next 5 hours sending me pictures and trying to find out where I live. FML
Today, my husband told me he doesn't see the point in trying anymore, and that he no longer loves me. I was devastated. He stayed on the couch while I went to bed. Ten minutes later, he said, "Do you mind? I'm trying to sleep." and asked me to shut up. FML
Today, I invited a guy I've been crushing on for ages to my house, and I really wanted to make a good impression. We were sitting in the living room having drinks when my cat came in, dragging a pair of my dirty underwear and dropped them right in front of us. FML
Today, I took my 5-year-old daughter to the play place at McDonalds but I had to keep her busy, instead of letting her play. A mom was teaching her 3-year-old daughter how to pole dance, using the play place's poles. FML
Friday 24 July 2015