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StarElise

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StarElise
  • Town/Country : UK
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1212
  • Number of comments : 31
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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StarElise's favorite FMLs

Today, while on the phone with a client at work, I was planning on saying either "Yeah." or "Uh-huh." Without thinking, I combined the two and ended up saying "Yee-hah," like a cowboy. FML

#6550671
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10457) - you deserved it (28229)

On 12/01/2009 at 12:25pm - work - by Jen (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I kissed my iced over window to know what kissing Edward Cullen would be like. My neighbor saw. My first reaction was to come up with a cover story. I licked the window and wiped my sleeve over it to look like I was cleaning it. My neighbor came over later and gave me an early Christmas gift. Windex. FML

#6472262
388 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6749) - you deserved it (78087)

On 11/27/2009 at 12:12am - misc - by obsessed (woman) - United States (Iowa)

Today, I was snuggling with my boyfriend on the couch. We ended up falling asleep, and when I woke up I felt a slobberly substance running down my face. It turns out, my boyfriend drooled so much, it filled my ear and overflowed onto my face. FML

#6422671
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32088) - you deserved it (3117)

On 11/23/2009 at 4:11pm - love - by TheGirl (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was at a party where I ate bowl of disgusting snacks because I didn't want to drink on an empty stomach. I spent the next twelve hours trying to prevent the world from collapsing into millions of demonic shards, cause apparently that's what a large dose of magic mushrooms does. FML

#6298765
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16744) - you deserved it (29753)

On 11/14/2009 at 8:37am - misc - by swedishdude (man) - Sweden (Skane Lan)

Today, I cut my finger open with a spoon. After waiting for 4 hours in the emergency room, the doctor told me I was missing too much flesh to qualify for stitches. He then called 2 other doctors in to examine it. Apparently they had a contest for patient with most ridiculous injury. I won. FML

#6036159
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31144) - you deserved it (6819)

On 10/28/2009 at 4:03am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was in my car studying on the campus parking lot. It was cold outside so I had the windows up. I had a severe upset stomach and was privately drowning in my own flatulence. Moments later, my crush knocks on the window to ask me something. I had to roll the windows down. FML

#6035910
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23413) - you deserved it (4773)

On 10/28/2009 at 3:19am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, a friend of mine got a bit drunk, but said she was fine and didn't feel drunk at all. I took her keys anyway and said she could sleep on my bed, while I slept on the floor next to the bed. I was rudely woken up in the middle of the night to her rolling over and vomiting on my face. FML

#5975036
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29100) - you deserved it (5780)

On 10/24/2009 at 2:27pm - misc - by marz88 (man) - United States (District of Columbia)

Today, I was informed by my next door neighbor that they heard me singing in the shower last night. I laughed and she told me that the family gathers in their upstairs room closest to my bathroom window to guess which song I'm singing. Every night. FML

#5971275
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26787) - you deserved it (5476)

On 10/24/2009 at 6:27am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Hawaii)

Today, I had lunch with some important potential clients at a fancy restaurant. I really wanted to make a good impression. When the piano music stopped, I started clapping while looking around for the pianist. Apparently, it was a CD. FML

#5953871
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7793) - you deserved it (26488)

On 10/23/2009 at 1:01am - work - by E.S. (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, for my two month anniversary, my boyfriend surprised me with a "present". He then lifted his pant leg. He had carved my initials into his leg with a knife. FML

#5937926
250 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47417) - you deserved it (4556)

On 10/21/2009 at 11:16pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my house got robbed, while I was upstairs taking a dump. FML

#5910203
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40291) - you deserved it (5294)

On 10/20/2009 at 6:56am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I had to take a dump. While looking for a book to read, I sneezed. The force of the sneeze caused me to shit my pants. The glob of dung then ran down my leg before falling out of my shorts onto my carpet, all in less than 5 seconds. Nothing in my life has prepared me for this. FML

#5828114
223 comments

I agree, your life sucks (84211) - you deserved it (13910)

On 10/14/2009 at 1:01pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my boyfriend bought me a beautiful pair of very expensive diamond earrings, along with a card that read, "To my beautiful brown eyed Princess." My ears aren't pierced, and my eyes are green. FML

#5733211
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35942) - you deserved it (3241)

On 10/09/2009 at 12:22am - love - by rhythmbandit (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I went upstairs to scold my boys for running in the house because someone could get hurt. As I turned around to come back downstairs I tripped and fell all the way down to the landing at the bottom. I could hear them laughing in their rooms. FML

#5715718
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21894) - you deserved it (5585)

On 10/08/2009 at 12:30am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was babysitting my niece when we decided to play hide and seek. I went in the shed, and waited. After waiting a while, I went to go back inside to see what was happening. I saw my niece had locked all the doors and was eating cookies on the kitchen bench. FML

#5699135
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8938) - you deserved it (26306)

On 10/07/2009 at 6:42am - kids - by vbscb (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)



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