About Star928 : Hahahabananaha people think im weird.
But why be boring?
Mobility
You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
Up and coming moderator
It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
Who’s the fairest of them all?
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
Today, my colleague yet again misused the word "literally." It's driving me insane. I have to work opposite him and hear him say things like he's just "literally shit himself inside out." FML
I agree, your life sucks (14476) - you deserved it (3346)
On 05/21/2012 at 10:11am - work - by Rebecca (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I tried to swallow a spoonful of cinnamon. I ended up vomiting chunks of burgers, all while bleeding from the nose and suffering throbbing testicles. I then had to clean it all up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5252) - you deserved it (36077)
On 05/18/2012 at 3:41am - health - by TLJ321 -
Today, I was in the hospital with rib injuries after being rear-ended by a truck. The doc said, "Well, you'll probably feel like you've been hit by a truck for a while." Everyone laughed, except me. When I said he was being insensitive, he replied, "Calm down, I'm just ribbing you." FML
I agree, your life sucks (11019) - you deserved it (19362)
On 05/16/2012 at 6:29pm - health - by ...... (man) - United States
Today, I was told the Mandarin greeting that my new Chinese friends at school taught me was not really a greeting at all. I've been proclaiming "I'm a dumb bitch" every time I've greeted them, almost every day for the past month. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17521) - you deserved it (5683)
Today, a pigeon got into my apartment. After knocking over a very expensive vase, it panicked, rammed itself against a window, and shat all over the floor as it tried to get out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13826) - you deserved it (1151)
On 05/12/2012 at 12:01pm - animals - by Eric Ngan - Singapore
Today, I had to pick my son up from school after he beat the crap out of another student. The words that made him go nuts were apparently, "You mad, bro?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (18787) - you deserved it (2619)
On 05/11/2012 at 3:30pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Sweden (Vastra Gotaland)
Today, my wife made my hand bleed by stabbing it with a fork. I'd only tried to take some fries from her plate. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10578) - you deserved it (18956) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 05/08/2012 at 11:48pm - misc - by Mouhahaa (man) - France
Today, I walked in on my daughter attempting to iron her pants with a hair straightener. She's 17. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15750) - you deserved it (4059)
On 05/08/2012 at 2:08am - kids - by SomePeoplesKids - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I got a parking ticket while I was in the car. I didn't even notice it happen. Ninja cops do exist. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16064) - you deserved it (4368)
On 05/07/2012 at 10:52pm - money - by Anonymous - United States
Today, the Star Wars Cantina song had been stuck in my head since I woke up, as my brother was humming it. I finally managed to get it out of my head. Then my mom started to whistle it. It's stuck in my head again. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11975) - you deserved it (3020)
On 05/07/2012 at 7:52pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)
Today, the father of my child couldn't understand why he had been laid off from his job as a painter's assistant. He couldn't find a broom or vacuum, so he "cleaned" a carpet by laying down strips of painter's tape and pulling it up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14199) - you deserved it (2336)
On 05/07/2012 at 11:57am - work - by notrocketscience (woman) - United States (Louisiana)
Today, I went to a river near my house. They have several swing ropes that you grab and then jump into the river. As I was about to let go of the rope, my leg got tangled and I was held underwater. My mom watched and laughed for a while before she came to help me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15423) - you deserved it (2156)
On 05/07/2012 at 1:25am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, my turtle, who had a little portion of the garden all to herself, died. My 5-year-old nephew wanted to "be like Mario" by jumping on her. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28376) - you deserved it (1554) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 05/05/2012 at 6:06am - kids - by Grindyloo -
Today, the school nurse called me in. She said she knew I was pregnant and she was worried about how it was affecting my grades. I'm not pregnant. Apparently I'm just stupid and fat. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23204) - you deserved it (3652)
On 05/04/2012 at 8:25am - health - by CharlieOrion (woman) - United Kingdom (Northamptonshire)
Today, my Dad and I killed a cockroach with a large metal pole. It was the most bonding experience we have ever had. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14028) - you deserved it (1467)
On 05/02/2012 at 11:29pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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