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SquishFish

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SquishFish
  • Town/Country : lost moon of poosh, the universe
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 4 February 1996 (18 years)
  • Number of visits : 2405
  • Number of comments : 78
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 4 posted

About SquishFish : About me: I love fish custard, Doctor who, obscenely long scarves, and I hate pears. I love legend of Korra and Avatar :) my favorite web series are VGHS and Most Popular Girls in School. I want to open up y own bakery someday, however I will never serve anything with pears in it.....

Amy: I started to think you were just, like, a mad man with a box.
The Doctor: Amy Pond, there's something you better understand about me 'cause it's important. And one day your life may depend on it. I am definitely a mad man with a box.

And five, very important, five. Don't let me eat pears. I *hate pears*. John Smith is a character I made up, but I won't know that. I'll think I *am* him and he might do something stupid like eat a pear. In three months I don't want to wake up from being human and taste that.


RUN!

SquishFish's last visitors

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SquishFish's FML badges

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

See all of SquishFish's badges

SquishFish's favorite FMLs

Today, I saw a man lying on the street. He seemed unconscious, so, being a nurse I went over and found he had choked. I removed the object from his throat and used CPR to revive him. My reward? A mouthful of vomit. FML

#5754979
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34903) - you deserved it (4259)

On 10/10/2009 at 8:07am - misc - by Nobody (man) - Singapore

Today, I made a tuna sandwich. It was really nice , so I looked at the label to see what brand it was. Turns out it wasn't tuna. It was fancy cat food. FML

#5636942
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10899) - you deserved it (38690)

On 10/04/2009 at 3:50am - animals - by Rizzle (man) - New Zealand (Wellington)

Today, I called my dad to ask why my university tuition had not been paid. He said that "my school was too expensive and he couldn't afford it." He then asked me if I would take in his mail while he was away. He was taking his new wife to Hawaii, apparently it's beautiful this time of year. FML

#5603956
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31311) - you deserved it (2150)

On 10/02/2009 at 1:18pm - misc - by ill (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my soon to be mother-in-law sent me a birthday present. It was a necklace for me to wear at my wedding. The pendant is a well known lesbian symbol. I'm a woman and I'm marrying her son. FML

#5392687
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33413) - you deserved it (2433)

On 09/21/2009 at 12:32pm - love - by whasian (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my fiancé, his mother, my father and I went out to celebrate my birthday and our recent engagement. After dinner, my father and future mother-in-law revealed to us that they had secretly been dating and were talking about also getting married. Anybody want cake? FML

#4996665
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41804) - you deserved it (2333)

On 09/02/2009 at 10:47am - love - by BDayssuck (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I got to go back into my house after it had been tented. Suddenly, a foul stench filled my house. My husband checked all around the house and finally checked under the house. There were more than 12 dead stray cats under our house, and guess who was in charge of pulling them out? FML

#4947813
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34892) - you deserved it (3109)

On 08/31/2009 at 3:37am - animals - by ahdeadcats - United States (California)

Today, I broke my mother's Tiffany lamp from the 1920's. Practically crying, I raced onto the computer to try to find one to order before she comes back in three weeks. The lamp is worth over twelve thousand dollars, and the only way I'm getting one is if I lived 90 years ago. FML

#4255235
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42294) - you deserved it (22290)

On 08/03/2009 at 1:24pm - money - by someexplanationrequired (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I found out I was pregnant. When I told my boyfriend that I couldn't believe this happened he said, "I'm not going to lie, I didn't always pull out fast." FML

#3711192
377 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17723) - you deserved it (77015)

On 07/13/2009 at 5:17am - intimacy - by air (woman) - United States (Utah)

Today, I found out I was pregnant. When I told my boyfriend that I couldn't believe this happened he said, "I'm not going to lie, I didn't always pull out fast." FML

#3711192
377 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17723) - you deserved it (77015)

On 07/13/2009 at 5:17am - intimacy - by air (woman) - United States (Utah)

Today, I called my boyfriend and when he answered, I said the dirtiest thing I could think of to him on the phone. After a long silence, I heard, "Lacey? Is that you?" I accidentally called my dad. FML

#3664691
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16994) - you deserved it (63325)

On 07/11/2009 at 11:13am - intimacy - by crazyt446 (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I come home to find my nephew holding pieces of my new $3,500 Sony Video Camera. He told me he threw it out the window because it was a portal for aliens. FML

#3527232
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43022) - you deserved it (2822)

On 07/06/2009 at 2:41pm - misc - by AidenFromSweden (man) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, I sent out my monthly curriculum list to the parents of the kids in my math class so they can see what their children will be learning. I usually end my e-mails with the phrase 'math is power'. Now, 154 parents got an e-mail saying 'meth is power'. FML

#3505255
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36019) - you deserved it (19624)

On 07/05/2009 at 2:16pm - misc - by shit... (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I went to the movies. After it was over I got up and noticed a designer purse sitting on the ground in the back row. I opened it to look for anything that could give me a address so I could return it. The owner came back, assumed I was robbing her, and punched me in the nose. FML

#3196366
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36103) - you deserved it (5343)

On 06/25/2009 at 2:00am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I wrote a poem for this guy I am falling for. Before telling him that I wrote it, he read it and then laughed at how "corny and stupid" it was because he would "never date someone who could come up with something that lame." The poem was about how vulnerable he makes me feel. FML

#2793513
217 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43624) - you deserved it (13419)

On 06/11/2009 at 2:12am - love - by seablue (woman) - United States (Florida)



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