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SquishFish

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SquishFish
  • Town/Country : lost moon of poosh, the universe
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 4 February 1996 (18 years)
  • Number of visits : 2361
  • Number of comments : 78
  • Number of FMLs : 1 confirmed out of 4 posted

About SquishFish : About me: I love fish custard, Doctor who, obscenely long scarves, and I hate pears. I love legend of Korra and Avatar :) my favorite web series are VGHS and Most Popular Girls in School. I want to open up y own bakery someday, however I will never serve anything with pears in it.....

Amy: I started to think you were just, like, a mad man with a box.
The Doctor: Amy Pond, there's something you better understand about me 'cause it's important. And one day your life may depend on it. I am definitely a mad man with a box.

And five, very important, five. Don't let me eat pears. I *hate pears*. John Smith is a character I made up, but I won't know that. I'll think I *am* him and he might do something stupid like eat a pear. In three months I don't want to wake up from being human and taste that.


RUN!

SquishFish's last visitors

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SquishFish's FML badges

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

See all of SquishFish's badges

SquishFish's favorite FMLs

Today, my mum found out she's pregnant. I would be happy for her, if she knew who the father was. FML

#20060753
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20970) - you deserved it (1480)

On 09/06/2012 at 6:21pm - health - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, it's day two of my two-month summer job on a Mediterranean cruise ship. I'm incredibly seasick, and the ship is still docked. FML

#20060408
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16600) - you deserved it (3857)

On 09/06/2012 at 12:51pm - work - by SummerJob (woman) -

Today, I met my boyfriend's parents for the first time. They jokingly asked me if I was only with him for his money. I didn't hear them properly so I just smiled and nodded. They now think I'm a gold digging bitch. FML

#20060240
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20217) - you deserved it (8700)

On 09/06/2012 at 8:46am - love - by Ashley - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I locked myself out of the house I was house-sitting. An hour later, and my fifth attempt at climbing the fence, I figured I'd try the door one more time. Turns out I was turning the handle the wrong way and the door wasn't locked in the first place. FML

#20060053
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5050) - you deserved it (16610)

On 09/06/2012 at 2:39am - misc - by ohhhemmgee - United States (Nevada)

Today, I told a girl that she had very pretty eyes. I then had to rinse pepper spray from my own. FML

#20059533
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17134) - you deserved it (1533)

On 09/05/2012 at 9:34pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada

Today, my girlfriend dumped me because I didn't take her pet rock seriously. FML

#20058507
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21042) - you deserved it (4306)

On 09/05/2012 at 4:14am - love - by steve (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my grandparents took me out for dinner for my birthday. After singing, "Happy birthday dear..." they froze. I had to say my own name because they'd forgotten it. FML

#20058422
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20719) - you deserved it (1322)

On 09/05/2012 at 2:12am - misc - by holymoly - Canada (Alberta)

Today, at a supermarket entrance, a seemingly drunk old lady said, "Sir?" as I passed by. I just ignored her and walked in. When I walked out with my groceries fifteen minutes later, several people were standing around her, calling for an ambulance. She'd passed out on the ground. FML

#20057390
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6745) - you deserved it (45481)

On 09/04/2012 at 1:26pm - misc - by Anonymous - Netherlands (Utrecht)

Today, I realized my husband and I have been fighting a lot lately, so to show him how much I care, I got a tattoo with his name on it. He hates it. FML

#20057350
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5005) - you deserved it (33725)

On 09/04/2012 at 12:44pm - love - by noname1025 - United States (Colorado)

Today, my fiancé and I were having sex. I've been secretly taking Welsh lessons as a surprise for him, so when I was getting close, I whispered the Welsh for "Don't stop." He pulled out and accused me of cheating on him with his best friend. He won't believe anything else. FML

#20057019
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27393) - you deserved it (3791)

On 09/04/2012 at 3:54am - intimacy - by gingerbetty - United Kingdom (Swansea)

Today, my little sister came home crying because someone had shown her a video about the Slender Man. Trying to calm her down, I explained to her that he wasn't real, just like Santa Claus. She looked up at me and said "Santa's not real?" It's been 3 hours, and she hasn't stopped crying. FML

#20053719
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10585) - you deserved it (26083)

On 09/02/2012 at 6:07am - kids - by The Horrible Older Sister - United States (Arizona)

Today, a small kid looked at me, screamed in terror, and hid behind his dad. I was just walking down the same aisle in the store. This is far from the first time it's happened. FML

#20051755
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17607) - you deserved it (2398)

On 09/01/2012 at 12:07am - kids - by KidKillah - United States (California)

Today, I had my boss over for dinner. Knowing that I was angling for a promotion, my fifteen-year-old son spent the dinner uttering lines such as "What's the point of showering before bed?" and "Bitches ain't shit but hoes and tricks." My boss was not impressed. FML

#20051346
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19305) - you deserved it (3995)

On 08/31/2012 at 7:16pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend texted me, saying, "I'm running a bath. Wanna come over and learn about water displacement?" I excitedly drove over, thinking he wanted to have some fun. No, he really did want to teach me about water displacement. FML

#20047830
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29430) - you deserved it (5864)

On 08/29/2012 at 12:38pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I was giving a tour of my boat to a man who seemed interested in purchasing it. Everything was going great. That is, until, the motor stopped running in the middle of the ocean. FML

#20047299
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16014) - you deserved it (1748)

On 08/29/2012 at 12:52am - money - by anon - United States (Maine)



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