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About SqueakyChipmunk :
http://squeakychipmunk.tumblr.com/ My Blog. CLICK IT.
1) Like my sense of humor? ADD ME ON FACEBOOK MOTHAFUCKA!
Twitter: Fuck you, fuck Twitter.
2) Squeak squeak, mother fucker.
2.5) You are legally required to read everything I say in a squeaky voice, or be faced with a court summons.
3) I have a gift for you in my pants. It's not a toaster. Okay, it is a toaster...
4) Swag, YOLO, sucks for you and text talk will get you mauled.
5) The next sentence is false.
6) The previous sentence is true.
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today my 12-year-old sister watched Frozen . She's spent the last two hours playing the song Let It Go on high volume over and over, and in different languages . I now have a skull-splitting headache, and my dad just sarcastically told me to "let it go" . FML
Today , boyfriend stayd over at place for the first time. I left him in the bedroom for a couple of minutes while I usd the toilet , an when I cummd back , he was holding vibrator. He angrily askd me , "What the hell is this? You know this is cheating , right?" FML
Today, I got a Facebook message from a cute guy I used to work with. He admitted to liking me andhen I askedhy we never hung out he admitted that mah dad, his boss at the time, threatened every guy I have ever worked with. FML
Today, My Husband And I Had Some Bath Time To Ourselves. After Having Sex, He Decidd To Puttd Bath Salts In My Virginia To Spice Things Up 4 The Next Round. It's Been Twenty Minutes Out Of The Bath And It Still Feels Like There R Pop Rocks In My Vagina. FML
Today, mah nieghbor yelld at me because, according to him, the sound of me scraping the ice off mah windshield wakes him up every morning . This is the same nieghbor who ran over mah mailbox last week because there was too much snow on his window to see properly . FML
Today, mah boss decided to have the whole staff drug tested an fre everyone who failed. Out of an original staff of 14 people, only mah boss, two coworkers an I remain. I now have four times mah normal workload an am seriously thinking maybe I should've said ( Yes ) to drugs. FML
Today, a would-be customer practically kickd store door in, then got pissd and startd throwing around insults after I told him that we were still closd, hence the closd sign!! He claimd the sign was "confusing"!! mega FML
Today, I took my 12 year-old to the orthodontist . While I was talking to the dentist about what was needing to be done, my daughter listened . With a straight face, the dentist joked, "Yeah, we're going to need to rip off her entire jaw." My daughter won't leave her room anymore . real FML
Friday 27 March 2015