SqueakyChipmunk

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SqueakyChipmunk

16Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 23 September 1994 (21 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 9999
  • Number of comments : 2534
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 375 posted

About SqueakyChipmunk :
http://squeakychipmunk.tumblr.com/ My Blog. CLICK IT.

1) Like my sense of humor? ADD ME ON FACEBOOK MOTHAFUCKA!
Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/squeaky.thechipmunk
Twitter: Fuck you, fuck Twitter.
2) Squeak squeak, mother fucker.
2.5) You are legally required to read everything I say in a squeaky voice, or be faced with a court summons.
3) I have a gift for you in my pants. It's not a toaster. Okay, it is a toaster...
4) Swag, YOLO, sucks for you and text talk will get you mauled.
5) The next sentence is false.
6) The previous sentence is true.

SqueakyChipmunk's page activity

Visits<b>Welshite</b> - the 06/20/2016 at 3:43pm<b>jbuckets_404</b> - the 06/06/2016 at 11:39pm<b>Epickiller</b> - the 06/03/2016 at 3:53pm<b>Rababco</b> - the 06/03/2016 at 1:48pm<b>Red_Curls1995</b> - the 06/03/2016 at 11:04am<b>mrcurtis</b> - the 06/03/2016 at 9:45am<b>adj14</b> - the 06/03/2016 at 7:51am<b>annoyedperson</b> - the 05/29/2016 at 3:30pm<b>Sierra120</b> - the 05/29/2016 at 2:03pm<b>rivaraven</b> - the 05/26/2016 at 6:30pm<b>Geoffelosophy</b> - the 05/21/2016 at 3:53am<b>raven83</b> - the 05/16/2016 at 1:53pm<b>bolee997</b> - the 05/12/2016 at 7:27pm<b>slightlyadulty</b> - the 05/12/2016 at 12:09pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/11/2016 at 9:15am<b>fantasyworld</b> - the 05/03/2016 at 10:00pm<b>Celestialfur</b> - the 04/24/2016 at 9:12pm<b>epicgamer</b> - the 04/16/2016 at 1:33am

Fucked!<b>jbuckets_404</b> - the 06/07/2016 at 5:43am<b>mrcurtis</b> - the 06/03/2016 at 3:46pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/02/2016 at 5:50am<b>CaptMacLeod</b> - the 03/12/2016 at 9:20am<b>Nahpets</b> - the 02/21/2016 at 11:00am<b>WolfAvenge</b> - the 02/03/2016 at 8:27am<b>Seabass_Chan</b> - the 12/19/2015 at 10:47pm<b>AmIReallyRenee</b> - the 09/14/2015 at 9:19pm<b>JCX2</b> - the 08/22/2015 at 2:22am<b>buckstop1</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 2:02pm<b>jadeeypo</b> - the 03/09/2015 at 1:27pm<b>Akazuki</b> - the 03/08/2015 at 7:36pm<b>marythecat333</b> - the 02/09/2015 at 10:52pm<b>BaDumTsss</b> - the 12/10/2014 at 5:44am<b>KrisTeaNah</b> - the 11/08/2014 at 2:41am

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SqueakyChipmunk's favorite FMLs

Today, my 12-year-old sister watched Frozen. She's spent the last two hours playing the song Let It Go on high volume over and over, and in different languages. I now have a skull-splitting headache, and my dad just sarcastically told me to "let it go". FML

by fuckyouharddad / 04/15/2014 at 3:24pm / United States (California) / Kids

Today, my boyfriend stayed over at my place for the first time. I left him in the bedroom for a couple of minutes while I used the toilet, and when I came back, he was holding my vibrator. He angrily asked me, "What the hell is this? You know this is cheating, right?" FML

by Anonymous / 04/15/2014 at 12:37pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Intimacy

Today, I got a Facebook message from a cute guy I used to work with. He admitted to liking me and when I asked why we never hung out he admitted that my dad, his boss at the time, threatened every guy I have ever worked with. FML

by cricha4208 / 04/15/2014 at 10:01am / United States (Missouri) / Love

Today, my house was robbed. My two 70-pound German Shepherds obeyed me when I told them to attack. They also obeyed the robber when he said, "Sit". FML

by stupiddog / 04/15/2014 at 8:08am / United States (California) / Animals

Today, I found out that the April Fool's Day prank my girlfriend and best friend played on me was not a joke, and that they actually did sleep together. FML

by gullible / 04/12/2014 at 12:01pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out I was pregnant. When I told my boyfriend, his response was, "I'll start watching pregnant porn to build up an attraction to it." FML

by Anonymous / 04/12/2014 at 1:24am / United States / Intimacy

Today, my husband and I had some bath time to ourselves. After having sex, he decided to put bath salts in my vagina to spice things up for the next round. It's been twenty minutes out of the bath and it still feels like there are pop rocks in my vagina. FML

by Anonymous / 03/31/2014 at 10:08pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, my neighbor yelled at me because, according to him, the sound of me scraping the ice off my windshield wakes him up every morning. This is the same neighbor who ran over my mailbox last week because there was too much snow on his windows to see properly. FML

by IcyWindows / 03/31/2014 at 10:03pm / United States (Utah) / Miscellaneous

Today, my dad got me one of those word locks for my gym locker, for which the password had to be a four-letter word instead of numbers. My dad chose the combo for me. It was "diet". FML

by anon / 03/31/2014 at 6:10pm / United States (New York) / Health

Today, I went on a first date with a guy I met online. Not only was he boring, he twice excused himself to go to the bathroom and both times he came back smelling of weed. FML

by Jaime / 03/31/2014 at 6:05pm / United States (New York) / Love

Today, my boss decided to have the whole staff drug tested and fire everyone who failed. Out of an original staff of 14 people, only my boss, two coworkers and I remain. I now have four times my normal workload and am seriously thinking maybe I should've said "Yes" to drugs. FML

by bringthemback / 03/29/2014 at 6:34am / United States (South Carolina) / Work

Today, my grandma reduced me to a sobbing wreck in two short sentences, just to win a bet against my mum. FML

by :( / 03/28/2014 at 4:25pm / Sweden (Vasterbottens Lan) / Miscellaneous

Today, a would-be customer practically kicked my store door in, then got pissed and started throwing around insults after I told him that we were still closed, hence the closed sign. He claimed the sign was "confusing". FML

by IDIOT / 03/28/2014 at 4:11pm / United States / Work

Today, I was stuck in the elevator for almost two hours. Where was the elevator mechanic? Next to me in the elevator. FML

by ClaustrophobicNightmares / 03/28/2014 at 4:42am / Saudi Arabia (Ar Riyad) / Work

Today, I took my 12 year-old to the orthodontist. While I was talking to the dentist about what was needing to be done, my daughter listened. With a straight face, the dentist joked, "Yeah, we're going to need to rip off her entire jaw." My daughter won't leave her room anymore. FML

by Anonymous / 03/27/2014 at 8:09pm / United States (Ohio) / Kids