Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

SpicyDuck

Online | Search for a member

SpicyDuck

53Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 19 September 1992 (22 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 12235
  • Number of comments : 369
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 19 posted

About SpicyDuck : Today, you tried to hit on me thinking this was a dating site. FML

SpicyDuck's page activity

Visits<b>nerdtron430</b> - 2 hours ago<b>dreamingof</b> - 20 hours ago<b>iT_Cereal</b> - yesterday at 5:19am<b>leopardwilliam</b> - yesterday at 1:08am<b>Laeffy</b> - the 08/27/2015 at 9:26pm<b>callcopse</b> - the 08/26/2015 at 12:07pm<b>kevinivek</b> - the 08/23/2015 at 7:51pm<b>Zatert</b> - the 08/21/2015 at 12:31pm<b>jjumprope</b> - the 08/21/2015 at 9:33am<b>EyRaB</b> - the 08/20/2015 at 2:19pm<b>jtfrisch</b> - the 08/18/2015 at 6:02pm<b>beeferjay</b> - the 08/14/2015 at 8:26pm<b>Jake42100</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 7:42pm<b>lennon_</b> - the 08/11/2015 at 4:01pm<b>LOUNGE_LIZARD</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 9:33pm<b>theadamz117</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 4:08pm<b>Nahpets</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 9:38am<b>dave_e_jones</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 7:01am

Fucked!<b>MrsWinchester</b> - the 08/09/2015 at 10:10am<b>christofferkamal</b> - the 08/09/2015 at 10:06am<b>FoxHunt9119</b> - the 08/09/2015 at 7:01am<b>bridges13</b> - the 08/09/2015 at 5:35am<b>jtfrisch</b> - the 08/09/2015 at 3:14am<b>lil_jimmy</b> - the 07/03/2015 at 11:56am<b>giantsfan2010</b> - the 06/30/2015 at 6:16pm<b>sprinkle90</b> - the 06/11/2015 at 6:00am<b>taylorzgoines</b> - the 06/04/2015 at 5:00am<b>Codyfootball</b> - the 05/22/2015 at 11:15pm<b>Mukuro</b> - the 05/21/2015 at 10:22pm<b>Echoa21</b> - the 05/16/2015 at 5:15pm<b>Planking_potato</b> - the 05/08/2015 at 9:55am<b>lesleyromer</b> - the 04/18/2015 at 3:14pm<b>Radgears47</b> - the 04/14/2015 at 4:40pm<b>chandler88</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 5:58am<b>j_mitchell25</b> - the 04/08/2015 at 8:28am<b>Mauer_jon</b> - the 03/30/2015 at 11:23pm

SpicyDuck's FML badges

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of SpicyDuck's badges

SpicyDuck's favorite FMLs

Today, my drill sergeant was yelling at me and asking me questions. I got a question wrong, and he asked me if I am a "Shit Sandwich". I replied "Yes sir, with extra cheese." I'm running miles till the day I die. FML

#21457342
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24485) - you deserved it (8943)

On 08/17/2015 at 9:55pm - work - by BarhydtBran - United States (California)

Today, I woke up panting and drenched in sweat from a horrible nightmare. I'd been dreaming that bright, colored shapes were falling from the sky and I couldn't make them all neatly align with one another on the ground. I guess I should stop playing so much Tetris before bed. FML

#21453585
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20829) - you deserved it (4446)

On 08/08/2015 at 6:56pm - misc - by I love L (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I had a dream about a giant spider crawling around in my mouth. I woke up to find that dreams sometimes do come true. FML

#21445902
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28580) - you deserved it (1806)

On 07/23/2015 at 9:05am - animals - by dirtbikeguy (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I had a dream about a giant spider crawling around in my mouth. I woke up to find that dreams sometimes do come true. FML

#21445902
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28580) - you deserved it (1806)

On 07/23/2015 at 9:05am - animals - by dirtbikeguy (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, at 3 in the morning, I was getting out of bed to use the bathroom, when my boyfriend grabbed my arm, looked at me wide-eyed and begged, "Don't... They'll take your skin..." He doesn't remember saying it, and now I'm scared shitless to use the bathroom at night. FML

#21439825
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27741) - you deserved it (2387)

On 07/10/2015 at 11:49pm - misc - by Julianapilikusplatosophophes (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my intern was given his own office. I have been asking to move out of my cubicle for nearly four years. FML

#21434251
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24940) - you deserved it (2087)

On 06/30/2015 at 5:57am - work - by bosslady (woman) - Belgium (Brussels Hoofdstedelijk Gewest)

Today, another idiot was admitted to my hospital with a foreign object up his ass. Yet again, the excuse went along the lines of "I tripped and fell on it." Please, someone tell me how you can accidentally trip anus-first onto the end of a cucumber, which just so happens to have a condom on it. FML

#21432533
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31785) - you deserved it (2304)

On 06/26/2015 at 9:21pm - work - by Idiot says "HIPAA violation" (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my husband was involved in a horrible series of accidents; he repeatedly slipped and fell into my best friend's vagina. FML

#21382840
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45982) - you deserved it (3357)

On 03/28/2015 at 5:20am - intimacy - by soontobewidow (woman) - Turkey (Istanbul)

Today, my boss used Siri to settle a debate we were having in our team meeting. Siri responded by calling him "Daddy". FML

Today, my girlfriend gave me my first handjob. I was nervous, so when she went to do it, I panicked and yelled, "Firmly grasp it!" She then couldn't stop laughing because it was a line from SpongeBob. FML

Today, I stumbled across one of my son's English assignments. Apparently, he decided to submit a haiku about how electrical outlets are technically "whores" because they hook up with countless cords for a "charge." I don't know whether to be amused or furious. FML

#21285975
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35241) - you deserved it (5179)

On 10/26/2014 at 10:42pm - kids - by MySonThePoet (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I was having sex with this amazingly hot guy. Things got pretty intense, and right as I was about to orgasm, the gold crucifix came flying off his necklace and sliced my eyelid open. Message received. Well played, God. FML

#21262317
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45569) - you deserved it (7168)

On 09/21/2014 at 7:27am - intimacy - by Sinnersinner - United States (California)

Today, I asked my dad to take me to the store so I could get some feminine hygiene products. When we got there, he went running down the aisles yelling, "Help! My daughter's bleeding to death! Where're the tampons?!" FML

#21261392
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42335) - you deserved it (4088)

On 09/19/2014 at 6:38pm - health - by tbree - United States (California)

Today, I learned that while other people drunk call their exes, I drunk adopt cats. Seven cats, to be exact. FML

#21248352
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43629) - you deserved it (10434)

On 08/30/2014 at 7:56am - animals - by cat lady (woman) - Norway (Rogaland)

Today, I came home and saw my cat all snuggled up with another cat on the sofa. I thought it was the cutest thing ever, until I remembered that I only have one cat. FML

#21191841
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43073) - you deserved it (4767)

On 06/28/2014 at 8:09pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)



FML's blog

  • Pauline's illustrated FML
  • Come on, no need to make that face ! Yep, it's sadly the last, mournful days of Summer. People are packing up their beach balls and flip flops, putting their caravans back into storage and trying to forget…

Friday 28 August 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: