Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

SouthernPride95

Search for a member

SouthernPride95
  • Town/Country : Knoxville, Tennessee
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1441
  • Number of comments : 93
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 9 posted

About SouthernPride95 : I drive a big ole truck i like to play the tuba im in marching band i like to wave the rebel flag around and i like to fish i also like to watch Dale Jr race every sunday in NASCAR i also dip good ole Copenhagen the best dip in the world

SouthernPride95's last visitors

king_of_LAdante_53Schizomaniacthebloodlegiondstark26kaetgreyy_gooooseBatgirl124thebestintheworl

SouthernPride95's FML badges

The rules are the rules

Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by our moderating team.

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of SouthernPride95's badges

SouthernPride95's favorite FMLs

Today, I lost my anal virginity because my boyfriend "slipped". FML

#11117532
350 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50281) - you deserved it (20655)

On 06/11/2010 at 12:56am - intimacy - by anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I put on some goggles on in the pool, only to go underwater and see an old man "discreetly" jerking it. FML

#9152447
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31751) - you deserved it (3790)

On 03/17/2010 at 2:12am - intimacy - by today -

Today, at a debate tournament based on domestic abuse, my partner yells out, "Has anyone considered that maybe the women DESERVED to be beaten?" FML

#9141842
254 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34935) - you deserved it (5523)

On 03/16/2010 at 8:46pm - misc - by Username - Sent from mobile version

Today, my girlfriend of 3 years left me for a guy whose favorite color is camouflage. FML

#8612745
277 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28766) - you deserved it (3496)

On 02/24/2010 at 10:29am - love - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I tried to see if you can kick yourself in the nuts. You can. FML

#8581671
240 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4729) - you deserved it (58197)

On 02/23/2010 at 4:28am - misc - by nutcracker (man) - Slovenia (Bohinj)

Today, I was letting my boyfriend of 4 years tie me up and do stuff to me. After finishing on my face, he then left. My parents had to untie me. FML

#7609277
332 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34938) - you deserved it (9140)

On 01/27/2010 at 8:35am - intimacy - by chanclepants - Sent from mobile version

Today, I opened the cabinet to take a pill for my headache. After taking the pill, I turned around and smashed my head on the open cabinet door. FML

#7475893
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18919) - you deserved it (5366)

On 01/21/2010 at 3:20pm - health - by imalwaystired - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was riding my dorm elevator from the 5th floor to the 1st by myself. Since the elevator is really slow, I pulled my pants and underwear down just for kicks. Just then, the door opened to let a girl on at the 4th floor. FML

#7450090
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4409) - you deserved it (71543)

On 01/20/2010 at 12:27am - misc - by embareassed (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, as I walked into my class, someone shouted at me, "Wild Snorlax Appeared! Use Your Ultra Balls!", since I am overweight and everyone in class laughed at me. I got made fun of by Pokémon nerds. FML

#7442333
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32222) - you deserved it (6962)

On 01/19/2010 at 7:03pm - misc - by snorlax (man) - United States (California)

Today, while using the bathroom on an airplane, someone walked in on me wiping my butt. That person just so happened to be the stranger I was sitting next to. It was an 8 hour flight. FML

#7145421
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24391) - you deserved it (6861)

On 01/04/2010 at 12:40pm - misc - by GeorgiaBOYY (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was at work and I had to take a dump. Since I was the only person in the bathroom, I started singing, "I'm taking a poopy-poop poop poop poop." I was not the only person in the bathroom. FML

#7050962
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7561) - you deserved it (55073)

On 12/31/2009 at 3:06am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my future father in law motorboated my breasts as I bent down to give him a hug goodbye. The rest of the family stood there laughing. This is what I'm marrying into? FML

#6665915
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19858) - you deserved it (2589)

On 12/08/2009 at 3:35pm - intimacy - by umm - United States (Texas)

Today, I was on a stationary bike at the gym. I got into a conversation with a very attractive female gym-friend. I felt something cool "down below". I looked down and saw one of my testicles had sneaked out of a hole in my shorts, I quickly looked up only to see her staring at the same thing. FML

#6665165
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14514) - you deserved it (3188)

On 12/08/2009 at 2:09pm - intimacy - by fatguyinalittlecoat (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, a friend of mine and I were talking about how hygienic we are. She mentioned she hadn't shaved her downstairs in a while. I was looking at the computer when she said this so when I turned to look at her I saw she had pulled down her pants and underwear. I was face to face with hairy muff. FML

#6646693
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18293) - you deserved it (3304)

On 12/07/2009 at 4:30am - intimacy - by roxyriley - United States (Arizona)

Today, I fainted for the first time in my life. I was in the shower. With my girlfriend. Apparently, my brain and my erection had a battle for who got the most blood, and my erection won. FML

#6583595
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20665) - you deserved it (3003)

On 12/03/2009 at 12:50pm - intimacy - by Silent - United Kingdom (Hampshire)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Bénédicte's Illustrated FML
  • "If drawing stuff is the food of love, then get a better pencil." That's not a real expression, I just made it up because I needed a good opening line. It's not even that good of an opening line, but…

Thursday 10 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: