Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

SouthernPride95

Offline (the 02/14/2015 at 4:05pm) | Search for a member

SouthernPride95

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 4186
  • Number of comments : 102
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 9 posted

About SouthernPride95 : I drive a big ole truck i l'm just a bible thumpin redneck if you don't like it tough i like to wave the rebel flag around and i like to fish i also like to watch Dale Jr race every sunday in NASCAR i also dip good ole Copenhagen the best dip in the world

SouthernPride95's page activity

Visits<b>Jay0501</b> - the 04/21/2015 at 8:13pm<b>knightofdarkness</b> - the 04/16/2015 at 9:55pm<b>_Willa_</b> - the 04/11/2015 at 3:51am<b>TrashSnail</b> - the 04/02/2015 at 6:13pm<b>augenblake</b> - the 03/27/2015 at 7:59am<b>ProgMetalMan</b> - the 03/25/2015 at 12:48am<b>fuckercakes</b> - the 03/16/2015 at 9:22am<b>jenamalone</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 2:58pm<b>Sklinetobe88</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 2:19pm<b>maximus_prime</b> - the 02/16/2015 at 8:37am<b>TheDude992</b> - the 01/30/2015 at 11:23pm<b>JulietMarie</b> - the 01/27/2015 at 6:44am<b>ariastyles12</b> - the 01/13/2015 at 3:03pm<b>abattior</b> - the 12/29/2014 at 5:00am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 12/24/2014 at 8:21pm<b>flupsht</b> - the 12/24/2014 at 7:42am<b>AHzulu</b> - the 12/04/2014 at 4:27am<b>_liam_72_</b> - the 11/26/2014 at 7:45pm

Fucked!<b>maximus_prime</b> - the 02/16/2015 at 2:37pm

SouthernPride95's FML badges

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

See all of SouthernPride95's badges

SouthernPride95's favorite FMLs

Today, while at the urinal doing my business, my trousers fell all the way to the ground. As I bent down to pull them back up, my boss walked in the bathroom and thought I was mooning him. FML

#14702634
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24307) - you deserved it (3407)

On 01/24/2011 at 9:33pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, while walking across campus, I stopped to look at my reflection in a window. I straightened my bra straps and then turned to the side to dig a wedgie out. It wasn't until I heard peals of laughter that I realized I couldn't see IN the classroom, but they could see OUT. FML

#14678100
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12794) - you deserved it (32655)

On 01/22/2011 at 8:35pm - misc - by RBHSWedgieGirl (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend of over one and a half years told me he won't give me a hand job because "it's awfully wet down there," and he isn't "a fan of other people's bodily fluids." FML

#14619610
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29636) - you deserved it (5944)

On 01/17/2011 at 10:19pm - intimacy - by No O-face (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my husband's old fraternity brother came to visit. He fell out of his car, puked, then passed out drunk in our driveway. We got him to the bathroom where he fell asleep. He woke up at 4am, wandered around the house naked, pooped in my trash can, then passed out again. FML

#14445248
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30280) - you deserved it (3535)

On 01/02/2011 at 11:14pm - misc - by Kristin (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I tried to contact my birth mother, who abandoned me when I was three weeks old. After months of tracing, I finally plucked up the courage to call her. She told me to "f*ck off and die". FML

#14310097
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49989) - you deserved it (6672)

On 12/23/2010 at 11:13am - misc - by unfortunategeek - United Kingdom

Today, I was driving with my dog. Looking out the half-open window he stepped on the switch, the window went up, causing his head to get stuck. I looked down and he had scared the shit out of himself, all over my shirt. FML

#14208425
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25859) - you deserved it (9270)

On 12/14/2010 at 11:24pm - animals - by fufu_mutt (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my boyfriend thought it would be funny to speak Parseltongue to my vagina to "prepare the Chamber of Secrets for entry". FML

#14190460
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41996) - you deserved it (10169)

On 12/13/2010 at 12:35pm - intimacy - by Wisconsin love - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, whilst driving to the store, an idiot driver found it to be okay to drive ridiculously fast in below freezing temperatures on the ice and snow. As he passed my car, I angrily gave him the finger. And then I realized I was wearing mittens. FML

Today, I went to use the public restroom. As I saw the toilet paper was out, I could see there was some hanging down from the other stall. As I went to grab it, I felt a hand grab mine and a voice ask seductively, "what were you reaching for?" FML

#13940137
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28118) - you deserved it (9240)

On 11/22/2010 at 7:18pm - misc - by reesemaster (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, at work I was looking for my lost wallet. After hours of looking I gave up and went home. The wallet then shows up in my mail box with an envelope marked "To the asshole." I opened the letter and it was filled with poop. My wallet too. FML

#13811167
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27415) - you deserved it (4470)

On 11/12/2010 at 2:06am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my family and I were watching Mulan, and I mentioned that I've always had a crush on Shang. After going into detail about how I would "marry his sexy voice" I decided to look up this mystery dream man. To my surprise he was played by Donny Osmond. I will never live this down. FML

#13807463
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8395) - you deserved it (23621)

On 11/11/2010 at 9:40pm - misc - by hot4donny (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my mother, my aunt, and my two sisters are all on their periods. I can't even brush my teeth in my own house without being treated like a criminal. FML

#13641509
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42951) - you deserved it (4781)

On 10/29/2010 at 8:10pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I found dried cum in my hair - after being at work for two hours. FML

#13572879
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13945) - you deserved it (43814)

On 10/24/2010 at 3:31am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was sitting in a lecture about the history of the KKK and the problems it has caused, when the weirdest and quietest kid leans over my shoulder and says "I'd burn you first..." and winks. FML

#13455190
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33638) - you deserved it (3291)

On 10/15/2010 at 2:00am - misc - by racist - United States

Today, I was sitting in a lecture about the history of the KKK and the problems it has caused, when the weirdest and quietest kid leans over my shoulder and says "I'd burn you first..." and winks. FML

#13455190
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33638) - you deserved it (3291)

On 10/15/2010 at 2:00am - misc - by racist - United States



FML's blog

  • FML's Question Time #2: School
  • We tried this before and it went pretty well, so here's another blog section for everyone to have give their opinion on a popular but controversial subject. OK, we're not debating a…

Thursday 23 April 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: