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This isn't what should be happening
You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.
Judgmental
You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.
A new Thumb
You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.
Today, I was playing some CoD online, when I realised I'd started humming an annoyingly catchy Bieber tune. Before I could come to my senses and pull out my mic, a bunch of my teammates started sarcastically singing along. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4709) - you deserved it (15395)
On 08/31/2012 at 3:20pm - misc - by bieberyoulittleSHIT (man) - United Kingdom (York)
Today, I got a perm in an attempt to prove to my family that I'd been doing well with my life since I last saw them almost a year ago. I ended up going over for dinner looking like Bozo the Clown thanks to my idiot stylist, and my brothers wouldn't stop mocking me about it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5415) - you deserved it (12168)
On 08/31/2012 at 3:57am - misc - by Bozo (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, I had to explain to my teacher that Czechoslovakia is no longer a country. She kicked me out of class when she found out I was right. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20284) - you deserved it (1103)
On 08/30/2012 at 2:33pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Maine)
Today, I finally confronted my boyfriend and asked him if he was cheating on me. He got flustered and said, "Technically, I'm cheating with you, not on you." FML
I agree, your life sucks (24361) - you deserved it (1762)
Today, my boyfriend told me that he had once been possessed by demons, and that he now sleeps with a knife under his pillow for protection from, "The dark spirits that are feasting upon his soul." I'm not sure that I'll be sleeping over anytime soon. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14528) - you deserved it (1473)
On 08/28/2012 at 11:56am - love - by StillBetterThanTwilight (woman) - United States (Minnesota)
Today, I turned on the TV just in time to see my picture on the news. I have no idea what they said about me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23175) - you deserved it (1720)
On 08/27/2012 at 2:45am - misc - by masterman - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I accidentally decoded the system my parents use for talking about sex while I'm around. It's a substituion cipher, using literary references. As they're both lit. professors, this has me perpetually grossed-out and wondering, "Are they really talking about Anne Frank, or anal fisting?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (17375) - you deserved it (1307)
On 08/26/2012 at 5:21am - misc - by ewww (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, my dog was diagnosed with depression. I got him to help with my depression. I guess we can just be miserable together. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20919) - you deserved it (1749)
On 08/24/2012 at 11:45am - animals - by alix - United Kingdom (Buckinghamshire)
Today, after my shift at the police station, I went on a date with a girl I recently met. We had a great date, that is until I opened the car door for her, and out of habit, pushed down on her head as she got in. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29379) - you deserved it (7936) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 08/23/2012 at 4:28pm - love - by thekriss - Sent from mobile version
Today, my pregnant wife broke down in tears over the fact that since moving to Brazil for my job, we don't have regular access to macaroni and cheese. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15736) - you deserved it (4156)
On 08/20/2012 at 6:06pm - health - by stupidbullcrêpe (man) - Brazil (Sao Paulo)
Today, at my job at the mall, our music malfunctioned and now will only play the same three songs over and over again. Our manager won't let us turn it off because "the customers won't notice". FML
I agree, your life sucks (14405) - you deserved it (141)
On 08/20/2012 at 12:31pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Singapore
Today, I was so bored that I actually read the iTunes store's terms and conditions. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24879) - you deserved it (5474)
On 08/16/2012 at 3:50pm - misc - by cardsftw - United States (California)
Today, I was out drinking with some friends in a Safeway parking lot, when I saw a familiar-looking vehicle pull up beside us. It was my dad, who angrily got out and demanded that I come home. I'm twenty-four, and now the laughingstock of my social circle. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9633) - you deserved it (14610)
On 08/14/2012 at 1:27pm - misc - by luvonsarah - United States (Oregon)
Today, my dad got so drunk that he had an intense argument with the microwave, resulting in him threatening to ground me after I tried to calm him down. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13992) - you deserved it (1028)
On 08/14/2012 at 12:14pm - health - by Todd - United States
Today, my boyfriend used various infomercial phrases like, "Wait, there's more!" during sex. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20120) - you deserved it (3032)
On 08/14/2012 at 1:16am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Nebraska)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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