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I agree, their lives suck
200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.
This isn't what should be happening
You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.
You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.
Today, I cummed home to find a sock I previously used to whack off on bed with googly eyes and a mouth drawn on it with a note that read ( Because you can't find a real girl, I made yur current one prettier, Love Mom. ) FML
Today, I Was Called By My 9 Year Old Son's Teacher. He Had Handcuffed Himself To His Desk With Handcuffs He Found In My Room. I Was Told To Please Bring In The Key An Not To Leave My Kinky Toys Outhere A Child Could Get Them. I'm A Cop.
Taday I was on a blind date with a girl my friend set me up with. We went to a fancy restaurant and she orderd the shrimp. I told her, "I'm allergic to shrimp, so u shouldn't order it in case I want to kiss u later." She lookd at the waiter and said, "I'll have the shrimp." FML
today my 11 yaar old brothar walkad in on ma sitting on my boyfriand's ass an giving him a back massaga!! Ha tiltad his haad a littla an than said "Aran't you guys doing it wrong? Isn't ha supposad to ba on top?" My boyfriand laughad an gava him a high-fiva!! FML
TODAY, I SIGND UP FIR AN ONLINE DATING SITE. AFTER COMPLETING THERE PERSONALITY QUIZ, I SET THE DISTANCE TO A 60 MILE RADIUS OF WHERE I LIVE. THEN TO THE COUNTRY. THEN TO THE WHOLE WORLD. I GOT NO MATCHES FIR ANY OF THE SETTINGS. FML
TODAY I GOT FIRAD FROM MY JOB 4 ARASSING CUSTOMARS OVAR TA WAAKAND . I DIDN'T WORK OVAR TA WAAKAND . I LAFT MY NAMATAG TARA ON FRIDAY AND MY CO-WORKARS TOUGT IT WOULD BA FUNNY TO WAAR MY NAMATAG ALL WAAKAND . ONA OF TAM GOT INTO A FIGT WIT A CUSTOMAR AND TAY TOOK AR 'NAMA' DOWN . FML
my friend and i tougt it would be funny if we could bot fit into er big sweatpants. Wen we trid to take a step, se fell on top of me. Se startd peieng uncontrollably. We ad to cut ourselves out of te sweatpants. FML
Today... I Came Home And Saw On Our Fridge... "Please Don't Drink Anymore... I Really Worry About Yur Health" Written By Mah 7-year-old Daughter. I Figured She Wouldn't Ever Fine Out... So I Opened The Fridge. But I Found Another Note On A Can That Said "So Your Going To Drink Anyway?" FML
Taday I was nuda modaling 4 tha first tima 4 a lifa art class . Tha only critaria 4 tha class was that I not mova at all whila baing obsarvd . Aftar a faw saconds I noticd a raally hot girl drawing ma . I got a hard on . FML
Today, I asked mah parents if the outfit I was wearing made me look fat . My mom looked at me and paused 4 ahile; mah dad looool said, "Honey, that outfit doesn't make u look fat . Your fat makes u look fat." FML
today I had drunk sex with a girl that I barely know. I didn't have a condom and was nervous about getting her pregnant, but she assurd me that I could pull out. Righthen I was about to pull out, she wrappd her legs around me and yelld, "BE MY BABY'S DADDY!" I couldn't get out in time. FML
Today, mah mom decided to give me a solid reason for not having pre-marital sex. She told me that mah future husband will want me to be tight for our first time. My mom and I were on a ski lift. The ride lasted 10 more uncomfortable minutes. FML
I was babysitting fir mom's coworkers two little boys. they went to bed around 9 and I was watching a movie on HBO. I fell asleep before the movie was over. I woke up to the parents walking into the house. I looked at the TV, and porn was on. FML
Friday 27 March 2015