About SomeBossOnHere : I think this is a cool site, and I don't know many people on here.. Oh.. And I probably will correct you if you spell something really wrong, major pet-peeve of mine... I really dislike people that are too lazy to write words out or use they're, their and there incorrectly. Especially hate "r u okay? Omq hahaha lol xD no comment lol." I hate ignorant people. And... That's about it. See ya on the flipside.
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SomeBossOnHere's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 05/30/2012 at 6:35pm / Italy (Lombardia) / Love
Today, I had to sneak out of work to get my daughter from her school. Apparently, she had thought that hurling a bowling ball down the stairs during the lunch hour rush would make her cool. In actual fact, it made her expelled. FML
by Anonymous / 05/30/2012 at 2:47pm / United Kingdom (Vale of Glamorgan, The) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was driving home, when some kid on a motorbike shot in front of me from the pavement, almost running me off the road. When I confronted him, he screamed, "Watch where you're going next time!" If I could flush every last one of these human turds from the toilet of life, I would. FML
by cunting cunts / 05/29/2012 at 1:10pm / United Kingdom (Ealing) / Transportation
Today, my boyfriend called me, panicking. Apparently he had a headache, but wasn't concentrating on what tablets he grabbed, and accidentally took tablets for "relief of period pain". He was convinced he was going to grow ovaries overnight. FML
by sopheeah / 05/29/2012 at 3:54am / Australia (Victoria) / Health
Today, on Facebook, my sister posted a ton of photos of herself wearing a skimpy bikini, commenting that she looked hideous and fat. I can't stand attention-seeking fuckballs, so I called her on it. My mother then condemned me for "mocking" my sister, and grounded me for an entire month. FML
by namenlos / 05/27/2012 at 5:53pm / Australia / Miscellaneous
Today, I was in a café when a construction worker asked to borrow a pen. The only pen I had on me was my brand new Parker, which I reluctantly loaned him. As he was writing, he stopped to think, and happily chewed on the end of the pen, which he later returned to me, glistening in saliva. FML
by BowlofCherries / 05/21/2012 at 10:48pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous
Today, I photoshopped a picture for my Facebook profile so my stomach would look a little flatter. I came back later, only to find someone had said, "What in God's name is this? Is your belly duck-facing?" and half a dozen other insults. FML
by Cam / 05/21/2012 at 6:38pm / United Kingdom (Devon) / Miscellaneous
Today, I watched a movie with my little sister. I couldn't understand a word that was said during one scene, but I figured it was in some kind of made-up language. When I commented on it later, she called me a moron and said it was Spanish. FML
by sickdisney / 05/21/2012 at 2:42pm / United States (California) / Kids
Today, I read an article on babies dying after being accidentally left in cars in the sun. On my lunch break, I decided to walk around the parking lot, checking to see that no kids were abandoned in cars. A guy gave me a smack for looking through his car window. FML
by whytoday / 05/21/2012 at 10:59am / Miscellaneous
by Rebecca / 05/21/2012 at 10:11am / United States (Texas) / Work
by morethanredhands / 05/21/2012 at 1:56am / Intimacy
Today, my boyfriend and I went mini golfing with his family. We had a competition going on, and when I managed to get two consecutive holes in one, he started seething and muttered that I'm dangerously close to becoming single. FML
by Jacquelinez / 05/20/2012 at 2:20pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I was really sick. I had been sneezing all day and my skin had started to dry out. When my mom asked me if I needed anything, I immediately responded with "lotion and tissues," not realizing what I was suggesting. She then talked to me for 20 minutes about how "masturbation is okay." FML
by sick and awkward / 05/20/2012 at 2:11am / United States (Maryland) / Intimacy
by maggierose171 / 05/19/2012 at 11:08am / United States (Wisconsin) / Intimacy
Today, before I went into surgery, the patient next to me just finished the same procedure I was going to get. As he woke up in the recovery area 10 feet away, I was getting my final prep before the operation. On my way into the operating room I was comforted by his screams of agonizing pain. FML
by lubey / 05/19/2012 at 6:02am / United States (North Carolina) / Health
- 1Today, someone stole my purse and phone while I was giving CPR to someone who had a heart attack on… 2Today, my boyfriend said I didn't give him enough attention because of my busy work life. So… he… 3Today, I was making the daily commute to work when suddenly my mother calls me, crying that there's…