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SnowWitney's favorite FMLs
by thedri11 / 05/30/2012 at 9:52pm / United States (California) / Money
Today, I was cutting the grass, it was really hot and I fainted. I woke up to see my mom standing over me. I thought she was going to freak out and call an ambulance. Instead she said, "Good, you're up. Now you can finish." FML
by Aw522 / 05/30/2012 at 7:07pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous
by HorcruxDelight73 / 05/26/2012 at 7:00pm / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was choosing my soft drink at a restaurant. The kid in front of me was too short to reach the lids so I handed him one. His mom rushed over, pried it out of his hands, threw it away, and yelled, "She's filthy, don't use that." FML
by td1078 / 05/24/2012 at 11:50am / United States (Maryland) / Kids
Today, before I went into surgery, the patient next to me just finished the same procedure I was going to get. As he woke up in the recovery area 10 feet away, I was getting my final prep before the operation. On my way into the operating room I was comforted by his screams of agonizing pain. FML
by lubey / 05/19/2012 at 6:02am / United States (North Carolina) / Health
by Nice / 05/01/2012 at 9:58am / Canada (Ontario) / Work
by anon / 04/28/2012 at 10:31am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous
Today, after several years of having her help me out by doing household chores, I bought my fifteen-year-old daughter a new pair of jeans. Her reaction was to squeal, "Master has presented Dobby with clothes. Dobby is free!" FML
by Anonymous / 04/13/2012 at 10:06pm / France / Miscellaneous
by jesifairy / 04/13/2012 at 12:46am / Australia / Love
by thatscreamerguy / 04/03/2012 at 7:11am / United Kingdom (Surrey) / Geek
by elisabeth_pwnes / 03/16/2012 at 6:38am / Norway (Vestfold) / Love
by wtbfiber / 03/05/2012 at 12:12am / United States / Health
by Anonymous / 03/04/2012 at 7:59pm / Australia / Miscellaneous
- Today, during an episode of King of Queens that my boyfriend has seen more than once, I decided I'd… Today, my 15-year-old daughter's pregnancy test came back positive. I wanted to know who the father… Today, my boyfriend came onto me in a romantic gesture. We ended up having sex, forgetting that the…