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SnowWitney's favorite FMLs
by kebaby / 06/19/2010 at 7:19pm / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous
by anonymous / 06/18/2010 at 1:25pm / United States (Florida) / Health
by AnRom / 12/17/2009 at 4:58am / United States (California) / Animals
by Sub / 12/03/2009 at 8:14pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Love
Today, at 2 in the morning, a noisy work crew started up in the parking lot next to my apartment. What were they doing at that ungodly hour? Installing a light that now shines right into my window. FML
by theropod / 11/15/2009 at 2:45pm / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 10/03/2009 at 9:03pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy
Today, I was picking my daughter up at day care. She was outside playing kick ball. A red ball rolls over to me, and trying to impress the kids, I kicked it over the slide. I turn around to see three crying six year olds. It was their hamster ball. FML
by Anonymous / 08/05/2009 at 1:10pm / United States (New York) / Kids
by jcesom / 07/29/2009 at 1:53am / United States (West Virginia) / Miscellaneous
Today, I brought my lunch to work in the only box I had lying around my apartment - a small one from FedEx. When I went to the bathroom before lunch, I returned to my desk to find that one of my coworkers had mailed my lunch back to my apartment. FML
by fedexed / 07/27/2009 at 3:12pm / United States (California) / Work
by Loveless / 07/19/2009 at 9:06pm / United States (Illinois) / Love
by Dumbass / 06/20/2009 at 2:01am / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was was leaving the library when I noticed an elderly woman being mugged. I was about to leave on my bike, but promptly went to help her. After I managed to scare off the mugger, I helped her to her car. As I was heading back to my bike, I notice the mugger riding off on it. FML
by rukus / 06/15/2009 at 11:25pm / Canada / Transportation
Today, I was at the extremely crowded gym when someone came up behind me and shouted in my ear scaring the living shit out of me. I jump into a karate pose in front of everyone. No one was behind me. It was a new song starting on my headphones. A trainer asked me if I needed an ambulance. FML
by dearme / 06/01/2009 at 9:53pm / United States (North Carolina) / Health
Today, my boyfriend of 2 years took me to get a tattoo done with his name on. He paid for it. After it was done he told me it was over between us and he thought it'd be a nice reminder of him for me. FML
by Angelofkarma / 05/25/2009 at 2:05pm / United Kingdom (Essex) / Love
Today, it's my birthday. I have gotten three calls all day. The first one was my fiancé, saying he wanted his ring back. The second one was my best friend, confessing to me that she had been sleeping with my fiancé for the past three months. The third was the dentist's office singing me a happy birthday. FML
by Anonymous / 05/14/2009 at 1:43pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous
- 1Today, I found out my parents have been slipping birth control pills into my morning orange juice… 2Today, I found out my husband has been catfishing my sixteen year-old brother for over a year. FML 3Today, I babysat a kid who was such a bratty little prick that I actually considered walking out on…