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SneakyDeath's FML badges
A new Thumb
You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
SneakyDeath's favorite FMLs
by Lordy / 08/03/2016 at 7:33am / Saudi Arabia / Work
Today, I woke up to an angry and threatening email from a porn company. Apparently, I took a sleeping pill last night and wrote a nasty email to the company about how they mistreat women. The best part: I used a web contact form instead of an email, so I have absolutely no idea what I wrote. FML
by damn you Ambien / 08/03/2016 at 1:48am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by nullpointer / 08/03/2016 at 12:38am / United States (California) / Animals
Today, I started my first day at a job. First thing my manager does is ask me if I knew the fastest way to kill someone there, then told me with a straight face all of what would occur when dumping a person's head into the deep fryer. Then the psycho assigned me to the fry station. FML
by TheVagabond_SRG / 08/02/2016 at 2:46am / United States (Texas) / Work
by SilverAuthor / 07/29/2016 at 6:53pm / United States (Michigan) / Money
Today, I learned that the hardest part of marrying a historian is choosing baby names. His top choices derive from two Roman magistrates, two abbesses, a tenth-century author, and an obscure Greek official. I already let him name our pug, for whom he chose the name "Tertullianus." FML
by NeitherHrotsvitNorErkembaldus / 07/29/2016 at 5:21pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 07/29/2016 at 4:33pm / Miscellaneous
Today, I had to spend two hours in the car with my mother. That doesn't sound so bad until you realize she's the kind of person who can, and did, spend nearly half an hour ranting about how the Big Beautiful Woman porn niche is the root of obesity in America. FML
by Toroka / 07/29/2016 at 2:59pm / Love
Today, I've owned my dream car for 11 days. Someone backed into it while it parked at work, and drove away without leaving a note. A man at a nearby business knows who did it but won't tell me because it was one of his customers. FML
by icefly / 07/29/2016 at 11:39am / United States (Florida) / Transportation
Today, I confessed to my boyfriend that I have no sex drive, but faked it to avoid hurting his feelings. It was after he confessed he is not attracted to women, but forced himself to have sex with me because he didn't want to admit he is gay. FML
by Anonymous / 07/27/2016 at 6:36am / Ukraine (Poltavs'ka Oblast') / Intimacy
Today, I finally got together with this great guy I've had a crush on for a while. He told me before that he is quite inexperienced, which usually doesn't bother me at all. Turns out "inexperienced" translates to "I will include your nose and chin in our kissing" in this case. FML
by Kiss-a-thon / 07/27/2016 at 6:01am / Germany / Love
by for my brother in law / 07/27/2016 at 3:10am / United States (California) / Intimacy